Tag Archives: dating

Girl Talk: I Am Going On A Sex/Dating/Drinking Sabbatical

After much thought and Advil, I have decided I am going on a sex/dating and drinking sabbatical. I went on a six-month sex sabbatical after my breakup from my fiance a few years ago — or, rather, I announced I was going on a six-month sex sabbatical and then it lasted for, I think, around two. It wasn’t a complete failure, in other words. Hilariously, I went on a sex sabbatical because all of my efforts to get laid were being thwarted and I figured I might as well decide to NOT have sex with a purpose.

Meanwhile, I have never taken a significant break from drinking. I didn’t start drinking until I was in college — I believe most people start in high school, so I was a late bloomer in more ways than one — and I remember the night I got drunk the first time as well as you can possibly remember a hazy night 13 years ago. The amount and frequency of my drinking has gone up and down over the years, but I generally consider myself to be a responsible boozer. I don’t drink and drive (easy when you don’t have a car!), I don’t say things I don’t mean, and, for the most part, I don’t do things I actually regret. Keep reading »

Why Isn’t Online Dating Working For Me?

Dear Dating Mom:

I’ve been using this “wink” feature on this online dating site. Problem is I never hear back from the men I send them to. What am I doing wrong?

Signed,

I’m just asking for a reply not a ring. Read more Keep reading »

Dater X: What If I Already Know My Green Zebra?

Ten years ago, after flicking my mortarboard in the air at college graduation, my best friend and I embarked on a rite of passage backpacking-through-Europe trip. Together, we traveled through France, Italy, Austria, Germany, and the Czech Republic, buckling under the weight of our backpacks and taking extra croissants from continental breakfasts at hostels in hopes that they’d last us through lunch. By day, we overdosed on museums and took roll upon roll of photos at historical sights. By night, we headed to plazas and parks to chug bottles of wine outdoors—something you can’t do here unless you want to get a ticket—and have deep conversations with people our age, both locals and fellow travelers. I was single for the trip, but somehow managed not to hook up once the entire month. I remember sulking about this fact at the time.

Fast forward to today, when an email popped up my inbox from my travel companion. She was forwarding me a message from some guy with an ultra Eastern European last name. Keep reading »

Teen Romance, Even Worse Than You Remember

Turns out you can blame more than just your crappy prom night on that d-bag who broke your heart back in high school! A University Of Maine study has confirmed that the quality of a woman’s early romances can be seen as an indicator for depression. If a girl is constantly looking for reassurance in the form of a boyfriend, she’s more likely to become depressed, especially if the guys she’s gotten involved with are jerks. The biggest red flags were nagging your boo to tell you they love you all the time, complaining about the same things over and over again, and the “totally deep,” er, excessive discussion of your personal problems. So, basically, anything you liked to do with your BF when you were a teenager was bad for you. Bummer. (Yeah, those cigarettes you sneaked count too, but they’re not part of this study.) Keep reading »

Women Play Games: Endgames. So What?

“Endgame: the stage of a chess game after major reduction of forces; also : the final stage of some action or process.” — Merriam-Webster

I guess you could say there’s an ongoing cultural “debate” over whether or not women play games. Most men say women play games. Most women say they don’t. Personally, I’ve been on this planet long enough that I have come to the conclusion that women do play games … but so what if they do?

I was trying to explain this to someone the other night. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: Facebook Ruined My First Love

Facebook is really great for reconnecting with old friends and finding out what your buddies are up to. What it is also great for: shattering every illusion you ever had about your first love–just like it did for me this weekend.

I first spotted Jeremy when I was a sixth grade student at a public magnet school in Fort Worth, Texas. He looked exactly like Jay Underwood, the guy who played Tia’s loser boyfriend Bug in “Uncle Buck,” which is to say that he was incredibly hot. I never spoke to him — NEVER — but I rode the hour each way to school with him every day. And, it turned out, his mom was my English teacher. She was firm, but friendly — and she was my only link to the strange but beautiful creature that was her son. Sometimes I would stick around after class to see if he would stop by.

I never spoke to Jeremy, until the very last day I lived in Texas. My dad is a nuclear engineer, and growing up we moved a round a lot — from nuclear power plant to nuclear power plant. I used to joke that we were the modern-day Joads (a joke that only works if you are a Grapes of Wrath fan). We were moving from Ft. Worth to New Jersey, and I finally worked up the courage to tell Jeremy how I felt. I wrote him a letter telling him how interesting and unique I thought he was. I told him I was moving but that I’d like to write letters to him, if he wanted. I slipped the notebook paper to him as I was getting off the bus on my final interminable ride home. Keep reading »

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