Karma’s a bitch, dude. This morning, I was frolicking through Starbucks, smiling to myself about how awesome my life has gotten. On Friday, I’m moving out of my parents’ house and into my own apartment. Today I woke up next to my new Gentleman Caller the night after we decided to date each other exclusively. The sun is shining. The birds were trilling. Tra la la la la la la!
And then I ran into the woman whose ex-boyfriend cheated on her with me two years ago. A woman who didn’t respond to my multiple apologetic emails because, let’s be honest, she probably hates my putrid guts. Keep reading »
Blind dates are awkward for everyone. There’s enough to worry about without discovering that your date just so happens to be your long, lost sibling. Um … yeah. Try recovering from that awks moment. And here I was thinking I had had the most awkward blind date of all time. He told me he was under investigation by the FBI during our first drink. Keep reading »
This era of my Dating Amelia column (which has been a fixture on this site, off and on, for a couple of years) is not going to last long — just this one post, actually — as I am not really dating anymore. After taking a two month dating/sex sabbatical, I sort of fell back into the dating pool when I unexpectedly met someone awesome and it’s been, for lack of a better word, on ever since. But! Over the course of my sabbatical, I thought a lot about how I would approach dating once I started back up again and I consider following a few different rules that I had either never really considered before or failed at entirely. Here are five of them — two that I have kept and three that I tossed out, not because they may not be right for you, but because they weren’t right for me. Keep reading »
Dear guys of the world, I would like to share something top secret: the things you do while on a date are important if you’re hoping to have sex with us at the end of it. Each action falls into one of two categories: 1) Makes our vaginas wet. 2) Makes our lady business as dry as the Sahara. Not always literally, but your actions may directly affect our lady lubrication and willingness to share it with you. Your mission during said date should you choose to accept it is to “get our juices flowing.” At the end of the night, if you fall into the “makes us moist” category, we just might fall into bed with you. Imagine that. After the jump, some things to avoid if getting laid is what you seek. Keep reading »
So, a male porn star walks into a bar. I’m going to call him PS for short, to keep things simple. I’ve seen PS around Chicago before; a couple years back, we ended up at the same karaoke event until 6 a.m. But we hadn’t talked much until I ran into him at the aforementioned bar, attending a fundraiser for sex workers’ rights. See, I write about sex with a focus on S&M and I do activism around it as well, so I end up coordinating with sex worker activists a lot. Plus, sex workers totally know how to put the ‘fun’ in ‘fundraiser.’
As we sipped on drinks, PS and I chatted about sex education, work/life distinctions, and that sex toy demonstration at Northwestern that landed a professor in the center of a controversy. Keep reading »