Tag Archives: dating

Dating Don’ts: In Defense Of Snooping

I used to be one of those self-righteous types who declared I’d sooner break up with a man than stoop to snoop. This stance wasn’t because I was noble or had never been tempted—I’m not and I have. I just remember all too well the day my mother read my journal aloud to my entire family. I was 17 and, as you can probably imagine, that book was bursting at the seams with embarrassing, angst-laden, mawkish, teenage drama. To say I was mortified … well, that doesn’t begin to describe the way I felt.

Since that day, I’ve always been very respectful of other people’s privacy, in particular my partners’ and, unfortunately, often to my own detriment. I’d listen to suspicious friends’ tales of hacking into their boyfriends’ emails or reading their texts and waste no time voicing my disapproval.
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The Best (And Worst) Cities To Meet Men

If you’re single and looking for a great guy, how many times have you cursed the city you live in for its lack of eligible bachelors? Maybe you’ve even contemplated moving somewhere else where the pickins are a bit more favorable. Luckily, The Daily Beast has taken all the guess work out of where your next home should be. They searched cities around the country and found the best (and worst) spots to meet men. Measuring cities with populations of at least 500,000, they ruled out suburbs (too many married men) and focused “primarily on which places had the highest numbers of eligible men, percentage-wise.” They also “gave credit to cities with the highest percentage of single men with four-year college degrees,” as well as those with the most places to meet men per capita, including gyms, bars, restaurants, clubs, and theaters (what, no dog parks??). In total, 36 cities were included in the “very scientific” study. After the jump, check out the top ten best and the top ten worst. Keep reading »

10 Things Guys Should Never Say If They Ever Want To See You Again

Ah, men. So endearing. So easily confused. We know we women aren’t the easiest people in the world to figure out, and it’s all too easy for a guy to open his mouth and say something that’s an instant dealbreaker. Whether the subject is sex, weight, or love, here are a few lines that should send you ladies running for the hills if you hear them from your dude. Feel free to add yours in the comments! Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: Breaking Up Is Easy To Do?

My only other relationship with a French guy was a short-lived fling towards the end of my junior year abroad in Paris. Knowing I was leaving soon, we started off light and casual, but a month into things he broke it off. We met up late (as usual) for a drink when he told me, “I’m not in love with you; therefore, I can’t make love to you anymore.” It seemed like the most absurd excuse—since when did hooking up with a girl who was leaving the country in two months necessitate love? Offended, I downed the rest of my gin and tonic, stood up and said, “I’m going.” It was perhaps my most “Sex and the City” moment. God, I was angry.

Up until now, I’d always looked at that experience as the most ridiculous way to break up with someone. Now, in a completely ironic twist, I decided to use the same strategy to break up with Mr. Cupid. Keep reading »

Can First Impressions Be Deceiving?

According to one of my former boyfriends, he absolutely hated me when first we met. I have to say the feeling was mutual. I had just gotten off a red-eye from New York to London and was tired, cranky, and hadn’t showered. No wonder he didn’t love me right off the bat.

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Girl Talk: Why Are Men Reluctant To Date A Woman With A Disability?

I recently met David through my blog. He was charming, witty and funny. After a bit of friendly Twirting (flirting via Twitter, the equivalent of computer footsie), he said he thought I was pretty funny too and even admitted to being a bit intimidated when I told him how strong my physical disability, Freeman-Sheldon Syndrome, had made my arms. This bone and muscular disorder has resulted in more than 26 surgeries to correct joint contractures, scoliosis and to straighten my leg muscles. You’d be amazed how strong my arms could get just from using a walker for 20+ years. They’re like giant muscles of steel, only smaller and dotted with cute freckles.

Well, this was a first, so feeling a bit bold, I asked him to guest-post from the male perspective on a question that has nagged me since my days in high school when I’d look at other girls and how the guys easily flocked to them. The question: Why are guys so reluctant to date – at the very least, approach – a woman with a disability? Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: The Liar Who Didn’t

A few days ago, I became convinced that Mr. C had gone on a date with another woman and lied to cover it up. The evidence:

  1. The morning of the incident, he had logged in to OK Cupid. It had previously been almost two weeks since he had.
  2. He kept changing our plans, sort of suspiciously. At first, we were to get a drink post-work, around 7:30. Then, he emailed to say that he was suddenly going to have dinner at his friend’s house, which is pretty much in the suburbs. He’d call me between 7 and 8 to set up something for later, around 9:30. Hmm … seemed unlikely to me that he’d make a 9:30 p.m. date back in the center of Paris.
  3. He didn’t call until 11 p.m. And he always, always calls when he says he will. And, he left his message in English. He always leaves voicemails in French. This one felt off and his excuses seemed rushed and disconnected.
  4. The next morning, he sent me an email apologizing, explaining what happened. He got very caught up in a game of Scrabble and had lost track of the time. His description of the Scrabble game just seemed a bit too detailed and contrived.

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Poll: What’s Your Number?

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Dating Don’ts: Why You’re Still Single

I’ve been writing relationship advice for nearly ten years now and the number-one question I get asked—by readers and friends alike—isn’t anything filthy or even fun. It is: “How come I can’t meet anyone?”

Depending on your situation, there are a variety of answers to this question, but mostly, finding someone to tongue wrestle with on a regular basis comes down to a combination of luck and timing. That said, there are things you can do to ensure that you never even come close to falling in love. Keep reading »

Quickies: The 5 Stages Of Relationships & The 100th Episode Of “How I Met Your Mother”

  • Relationships start out fun and full of laughs, but, eventually, they end in passive-aggressive battles. Which of the five stages of relationships are you in? [Maxim]
  • A panel of judges has deemed the neck an intimate part of the body after Wahid Sene tried to have his conviction for breaking into a woman’s apartment, stripping naked, getting into bed with her, and licking her neck overturned. [Gothamist] — Is this seriously a fetish for people outside the wannabe-vampire set?
  • Looking for a forum where you can kiss, f**k, and tell besides all the other popular social networking sites? Well, I Just Made Love lets you “say exactly when, where and, yes, how you got it on.” [Urban Daddy] — Seriously, when are we going to quit with the TMI?
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