Tag Archives: dating

Dater X: I Got Dumped For Christmas

Fine, I’ll admit it. I had many a daydream about how I was going to spend the week between Christmas and New Year’s. I was looking forward to a staycation and getting to spend lots of time with the Architect. We’d been dating for a month and a half and I imagined us heading out in the snow to museums, cuddling up on the couch to watch TV shows, going to parties as a couple, and having sleepovers where, for once, we could actually sleep in. So my stomach got that just-belly-flopped-off-the-high-dive feeling when he called on Christmas Eve and said, “Can we talk?”

Noooooooooo! Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: Goodbye For Good?

It all happened so quickly. And was over just as fast.

At 9 a.m. on Wednesday morning, I found myself unexpectedly waiting at the Gare du Nord, my heart beating out of my chest and my head spinning like crazy. It was only 12 hours ago that my ex-love, Alex, had come back into my life, and it took only a fistful of Euros and a three-hour train ride to close the distance—both metaphorical and physical—between us.

Strangely, it had been almost a year since Alex and I saw each other last. We’d struck up a blog romance last year and had such a profound connection that we had crossed the Atlantic a few times to see each other. Keep reading »

Why Am I Still Single?

I was on the phone with my friend Beth, a 31-year-old international sales exec at a major Hollywood film studio.

“I can’t believe a four-year relationship could end with us living on two separate coasts,” she said, “But he was traveling so much and I finally just told him, ‘This is not what I signed up for when I got involved with you.’ So, we’re officially separated.”

She sighed. I sighed.

“Anyway enough about me, what about you, Italian girl? I thought they worshiped American women in the land of pasta and love, why are you still single?” Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: A Celebrity Primer

The New Year is a time for taking stock, a time for looking back and learning as well as looking ahead towards a richer future, secure in knowing that the lessons we’ve learned this past year will help us lead a better life in the next.

Obviously, there is no better source for these life lessons than within the annals of celebrity gossip. Celebrities are richer than us, prettier than us, and—with rare exception—skinnier than us. We watch them onscreen and/or listen to their songs—why shouldn’t we learn from their mistakes?

Sadly for them, 2009 was a rough year for famous people in relationships. There were more breakups than there were deaths! But luckily for us, there are valuable nuggets of knowledge contained within almost every celebrity split … Keep reading »

GuySpeak/GirlSpeak: From Booty Call to Boyfriend?

We’re back again for another edition of GuySpeak/GirlSpeak, where we take a close look at the advice given by guys to girls over at GuySpeak, throw in our own two vagina-possessing cents, and then have you weigh in. This week’s scintillating question: Can you turn a booty call into a boyfriend?

This guy uses me as a booty call, but I really like him, so whenever he calls I go meet him. Should I play hard to get and stop answering his calls? He always avoids my questions about a relationship.

Read on for our guy vs. girl advice … Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: The Big Picture?

Christmas Day I woke up in an unfamiliar bed with a pounding headache. The hell? Where the eff am I? Then it all came rushing back: glass after glass of champagne at a boat cabaret on the Canal de la Villette singing along to Judy Garland songs. Most random Christmas Eve ever.

I snorted out loud—well, this would have to be the first time I woke up in a stranger’s bed and didn’t do something I regretted.

I closed my eyes again, trying to re-piece the evening. Where did it all start? Oh right, new friend Emily had invited me to this concert, and we’d had dinner at her apartment beforehand where we commenced with a bottle of champagne and a delicious squash/spinach/pasta dish she’d made. Then off to the boat where we were treated to free booze because her friends were the ones who put on the act.

At the end, it had been like an awkward but good third date … Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “How Long Should I Wait To Be Exclusive?”

Sometimes the advice for people who email me is so obvious I wonder if they just need to hear someone else say it to truly believe it themselves. Today’s column is dedicated to those individuals.

I have been talking to/dating this girl for a little over a year. We both agreed not to be exclusive, which was fine at the time. Now, a year later, I am ready for more. I told her that I am open to becoming more and her response was what I expected. She was not sure what she wanted. Over the last few weeks, she has made it clear that she is not saying no but that she is confused. Making comments such as “My friends think you’re great and that I am stupid, and I agree with them.” I understand she is scared of the commitment and I have no problem being patient, as I have told her. My question today is how long should I wait? I do not want to walk away from something I feel could be great. I know she wants to but is scared to make the “jump.” At the same time, I don’t want to put my heart on the chopping block. — Running out of Patience

Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “Why Is My Skin Color Such A Novelty To Men?”

This past week I met a guy while out of town for a cousin’s wedding. After hanging out together and talking over the course of the week, we finally hooked up the morning before I went home. During our post-hookup cuddle he tells me that I was the first black woman he’s ever been with (he was white) completely without provocation. The thing is, this is not the first time this has happened to me. In fact, it seems to be a recurring pattern in both dating and casual scenarios alike. And it isn’t just white guys that are guilty. I have had other races (except black men) also randomly confess this to me. This has left me with two questions: 1) Are these men really just thinking “OMG I’m talking to a black chick” while I thought we were getting to know each other as individuals? And 2) why do they feel the need to tell me this, almost always after sexual intimacy? I am biracial and my partner’s race has never made a difference, nor does it even cross my mind when I date a man of a different race, let alone bear such a burden that I feel the need to tell them about it. So what gives? I’m starting to feel like men only see me for my novelty factor. — Colorblind

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Girl On Girl: No One Believes Me When I Tell Them I’m A Lesbian

The other night my girlfriend and I were lying in bed and she said, “You know, sometimes I forget you’re gay. I mean, you just look so straight.”

“Crap,” I thought, “her too.” Then I rolled over so my back was to her and attempted to compose myself, to figure out how to explain, for the millionth time, that I have thought this over enough times to be fairly certain that I’m into women.
Keep reading »

Jewish Girl Seeks “Goyfriend” for Christmas

Up until I was six years old, my family celebrated Christmas. Although both of my parents are Jewish, our family was not particularly religious. They just thought Christmas was a fun holiday for kids. I still fondly remember my Miss Piggy star ornament sparkling atop the tree. Ahh, memories. Keep reading »

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