Picture this. You’re surrounded by demons in the mist of an enchanted forest. The Pirate King Sirron has overtaken the portal to Hell and has, through dark magic, bent Demogorgon the Demon Prince to his will. The full force of the Underworld is against you. You, a strong bull-man Paladin Knight, accompanied by a Dwarf, a Cleric, an Elf and a Sorcerer (respectively named Ryan, Phil, George and Steve). This, my friends, is Dungeons & Dragons.
Perhaps this is not where you’d expect to find a bright, bubbly, blonde, violently-sexy and overly-confident comedian. But a few months back, I found myself in this very scenario, sitting in a room full of nerds. One of three girls in the whole place—and the only one that looked like she’d been out of her apartment in the past three months—I realized that, by default, I was an absolute babe. Whoa, I thought to myself. I am the Megan Fox of Dungeons & Dragons right now.
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All Jill wants is true love, and she’s willing to pay big to make it happen. Jill, you see, is the owner of Extensions by Jill, a hairstyling salon in New York City’s East Village. And she’s offering her clients a very special deal. If you set her up on a date, she’ll give you 20 percent off her services. If the date goes well, you get another 2o percent off. If she and the guy you set her up with really hit it off — like, wedding bells hit it off — you get free hair services for life. Not a bad plan, and she’s made this video, with very soft Barbara Walters lighting, to prove it.
As Jill explains it, she’s looking for a smart, funny guy who’s the perfect mix between Stephen Colbert and Jeff Goldblum. That shouldn’t be too hard to find, right? So ladies, do we know anybody for Jill? And what’s the craziest deal you’ve ever made to get set up? [Hair For Love]
Ladies, if you ever start to date a guy who fits one of the descriptions in this slideshow, be wary: these six guys come with baggage. But wouldn’t you know it, women aren’t always gentler when it comes to relationship heartbreak, so we’ve thrown in six types of women who won’t make dudes happy either. We’ve got all your backs.
One of the hazards of writing on the Internet for a living is how everything will show up on a Google search. On a day-to-day basis, I’m mostly an open book writing about my opinions, my sexuality, my depression, and even my love life. My private life is private, but a lot of topics that other people consider private are the very things I write about daily.
There are times, however, when I regret being as open as I am. Not everyone is accepting; my openness makes me vulnerable towards people I barely know. I’m still human and I still care what people think about me. Sometime a girl wants people to get to know her good parts first and the rest of her human-being-messiness sl-o-w-ly. Nowhere is this more apparent than in dating — especially online dating, where as soon as you find out someone’s last name you Google it and make sure they’re not a serial killer. If a gentleman caller Googles me, there is lots to read. Imagine how an ordinary person feels about her employer finding her Facebook page and then imagine the guy who have a crush on having access to your id.
Yet, to a certain extent, blogging acts as a “douchebag filter” by keeping certain guys away. Recently I was chatting with a fellow I met online who I’d really been into until … well … he completely blew it before we’d even met. How’d he screw up so bad? He wrote to me in an IM conversation, and I quote, “But how could I ever date someone that if my parents Googled her, there is writing that she likes to be called a slut?”
How indeed. Our IM conversation, for your perusal, after the jump: Keep reading »