Tag Archives: dating

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend’s Never There For Me”

Shortcuts” is a new feature of “Dear Wendy” in which I answer readers’ letters in two sentences or less because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Here we go with round three … Keep reading »

Girl On Girl: Have I Become A Stereotypical “Angry Lesbian”?

A few weeks ago, my girlfriend and I were in a pizza place and a group of big, drunk guys wearing sports jerseys and smelling of beer walked in. We were just leaving and as my girlfriend stood up, I looked at her and thought, “Wow, I’m so lucky to be dating her.” I couldn’t resist leaning over and pecking her on the cheek. Before you freak out, I didn’t suck on her neck or stick my tongue down her throat. I said peck. On the cheek.

But the boisterous jocks went silent and one of them whispered, “lesbians.” My girlfriend and I smiled and I rolled my eyes. Seriously, how could anyone be so juvenile? But as we were walking out the door one of the guys yelled something like, “Hey, do you girls like DILDOS!?!?” and the whole group just cracked up. Swearing, I turned back, determined to give those jerks a piece of my mind. But my girlfriend grabbed my hand and pulled me across the street.

“I was surprised you kissed me in front of them,” she said once I was done cursing. “I mean, you knew that would happen.” Keep reading »

Girl Talk: One-Nighters Are Not For Me

I have had my share of one-night stands. In fact, a significant percentage of the people I have slept with in the nearly 10 years since losing my virginity have been one-time deals. There was that guy at Mardi Gras — hold on … have to ask my friend what his name was … damn, she doesn’t remember either. Laird! His name was Laird, right? Anyway, there was Andrew, my realtor, who showed up at my apartment in the middle of the night and I was like, “Hey, why not?” The second guy I had sex with was also a one-night stand — his name was Sean. He was really good-looking and when it was over he said it had been “lovely” and I remember he had a cute face, but I cannot remember how we ended up in bed together.

What I also didn’t remember, until recently, was that most of these one-night stands didn’t make me feel very good the next day. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “Should I Move For My Boyfriend?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years now. We are both 25 and have lots of love and respect for one another. I am currently working in L.A. at a job I really like. He’s graduating soon with his Ph.D. in Economics and is deciding to go back to school again for a second Ph.D. at Columbia where he just got accepted. Although I think it’s great that my boyfriend is so academic and ambitious, I am struggling with the idea that he is moving 3000 miles away! He says that when he goes, he would like me to quit my job, get married and move there with him. My issue is that I’m afraid if I do move to New York with him, I’ll regret quitting my job if it doesn’t work out but I’m also afraid that if I don’t go with him, I might miss out on a future with him. I’m not too fond of long distance relationships so this is really putting a strain on me because either way I feel as though I have to give something up in order for this relationship to continue. We have discussed options of him finding a job and staying in California, but since the job market has been extremely tough this year he believes that going back to school will put him ahead of the pack once the economy picks back up. What should I do? Any advice would help! — Torn

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Dealbreaker: He Said I Needed Grooming

Tobey* was the perfect guy to date right after my divorce. He was cute, fun, and had a body like a gymnast. He was younger than I was, but not too young. He liked the same things I did: eating good food, going to the movies, and strolling around Manhattan. He was a great kisser and even better in the sack.

Then he told me I needed grooming.

Not just any grooming. Down there grooming. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “Couples Are Moving Way Too Fast These Days”

I am 24 and my boyfriend is 29 and we have been together for two years. We are very in love. (Sick, I know!). He is my best friend, and we spend almost all of our time with each other, but we don’t live together. Why do people get a strange look on their face when they find out we don’t live together? What has the dating world come to when two 20-somethings can’t just be in a relationship with each other? Why do we have to combine space, belongings, finances and lives even more than we already do when we start dating someone? I would love a reassessment of how a “normal” courtship is supposed to go. I know that we are doing what’s right for us—not rushing into anything, not taking the step that so many have, only to see it blow up miserably. (My sister is a great example of this and even worse my boyfriend, who was married for two years when he was not even older than I am now!) What’s normal these days might not be right! — Appalled by Modern Times

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Mind Of Man: The End Of Dating

I am canceling dating. That’s right. The public negotiation for sex, commitment, and marriage between two strangers that begins with “Do you want to go out Friday night?” is now officially over. Kaput. Adios!

It’s too much drama. Stress. Money. It’s nothing but awkward conversations, uncomfortable clothes, and mediocre Thai meals. Nobody seems to enjoy it anymore. Women are bitterly disappointed by the whole process. Men are apathetic towards it. It’s a broken system where no one gets what they want. It’s all push and no give. Women talk about dating the way they’d talk about a root canal. Men don’t even talk about it. In fact, my gender has pretty much already canceled dating – referring to it, instead, as “hanging out.”

What’s the point? Keep reading »

Girl Talk: The Phone Call Rule

At brunch on Sunday, my friend Liza explained to me what she calls “the phone call rule.”

“Now that I’m out of the ‘one-night stand’ game, I have a rule that if I hang out with a guy that I’m dating, even casually, and we engage in intimate activities, I tell him that I would appreciate a phone call from him the next day.”

“Really?” I asked, my jaw kind of dropping.

“Yeah. I politely tell him that a phone call the next day represents respect,” she said. “It doesn’t have to be a long phone call, or anything. I just want him to ask me if I’m doing OK or tell me he had a good time or whatever. Is this really too much to ask?”

My first reaction was, “Yes.” Then again, this is coming from a girl who felt weird asking a guy I had just engaged in “intimate activities” with to help me find a cab at 3 a.m. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Dated A Psychotherapist

If you had brain cancer, would you date a neurologist? Would you sleep with a chiropractor to ease your chronic back pain? Around my twentieth birthday, I was hit with a sudden onset of crippling depression and anxiety. After two years, several doctors and a veritable rainbow of colored mood-altering capsules, I still felt hopeless. With no cure in sight, I fell for a psychotherapist. Keep reading »

10 Time-Tested, 100 Percent True Dating Theories

Yesterday, I stumbled across this list of dating theories from an anonymous dude who claims to have over two decades of dating experience. That’s a confirmed bachelor, all right. Most of his theories were funny (“Women Who Begin Emails With ‘Hey You’ Are Crazy”) and some were straight-up genius (“Drinking Red Wine On Dates Is The Best”). This got me thinking about some of our favorite dating theories over here at The Frisky. Check out our assorted theories after the jump, and share yours in the comments. Keep reading »

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