I used to view Valentine’s Day as annual torture from pink fluffy teddy bears, questionable lingerie advertisements, and the Hallmark overlords. So much worse than the iron maiden. Every year, V-Day signaled the boys I dated to forget everything they knew about me and my otherwise sane girlfriends to either retreat into nauseous couple cute-love or singleton-induced hatred for the world. Keep reading »
Tag Archives: dating
Dear men everywhere,
I know in the past we’ve had our fair share of arguments, disagreements and maybe even a few bloody battles. I’ve probably called you all misogynists a few too many times and I know I often say things are easier for you than they are for the ladies. Sorry. I know it isn’t your fault that men tend to make more than women. And you, personally, are not responsible for the obsession with size 0 gals nor is it your fault that we’ve never had a chick president. I’ll admit: I hate on you guys a lot for no reason at all.
But, recently, I’ve come to appreciate you fellas and your trials and tribulations a whole lot more. Now, I know what you’re thinking. You think this is all tongue-in-cheek. You think I’m putting up a front, making fun of you. But seriously, man, I get it now. And what, you ask, has opened my eyes to all your pain and suffering?
Dating women. Keep reading »
I know, I know … the point is to have a magical, fantastical, romantical Valentine’s Day … the kind of evening that makes you tear up and blush in the re-telling, while your less-fortunate girlfriends snarl and gnash their teeth in envy.
Sadly, having the perfect V-Day isn’t easy. For one thing, unless you’re a narcissist, you generally have to rely on another party’s cooperation to truly make it work. For another, much like other festive occasions such as weddings and funerals, Valentine’s Day is an excuse for retailers and restauranteurs to jack up their prices. So unless this recession has left you and your man unscathed, the cost might be a bit of an ouchie. Then there’s the pressure. The shopping. Do you go with the fancy under-duds or fly freebird? Do you get him a gift or is he supposed to be the one doing the giving? So many questions, so few correct answers … Keep reading »
I don’t know much about men or dating, but I do have one thing down: staying broken up. I was recently asked by a friend, “How do you do it? How do you not call, text, or email him? Do you just not get the urge anymore, the minute things are over?” Oh, I get the urge. I just don’t give in to it. And I’m better off as a result — here are six ways I resist the desire to call, text, or email an ex.
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Whenever I walk down the street, I like to pretend that the music I’m listening to is my own personal soundtrack. The other day, a song popped up on my iPod that was so emotionally loaded with memories that it took me by surprise. It was the song I listened to on repeat for weeks during my freshman year of college, after a particularly dreamy encounter with a guy I was crushing on. For me, the song captured all the intricacies and excitement of that moment. It escalated my already-giddy happiness into a euphoria that beat any thrill I could get from dissecting the encounter with a friend. The music knew how I felt and carefully played with my emotions to make me believe that this song “got” me — like it was made just for me and that moment.
I truly believe that for every relationship, quasi-relationship, or sexual encounter you have, there is a song that perfectly encapsulates it. A song, no matter how annoying, whiny, cheesy, or sappy, that you can listen to on repeat because, durnit, that ditty knows exactly what you’re going through. After the jump, I’ve compiled a list of songs — taken from my personal experiences — which I feel categorize and exemplify specific relationships. Keep reading »
Over at the Daily Mail today, there’s an, um, interesting article about what you should and shouldn’t wear if you want to get lucky with your date on Valentine’s Day. The writer, you see, has been schooled by plenty o’ men and has learned designer duds and super high heels scream “high maintenance” to all men and will guarantee you’ll be spending the night alone. Find out what she says to avoid, as well as my suggestions, after the jump … Keep reading »
If you’ve been to bars in major metropolitan cities, chances are you’ve come into contact with a “pickup artist”: a dude who is trying to get your number by following a script. Whether he learned about pickup artistry from Neil Strauss’s book The Game or that VH1 show, “The Pickup Artist,” the guy macking on you is focused on one goal — getting women, including you, into bed.
But the opposite is not true in a “pickup artist school” for women: in fact, London’s Flirt Diva Academy focuses mainly on flirting. According to “flirt coach” Sue Ostler, flirtation is “lighting the spark to your personality and letting people see it shine through” and her Flirt Diva Academy services women ages 16 to 60 in classes like “Bag A Boyfriend” and the “Flirt Masterclass.” Or they can partake in a “Flirt, Schmooze & Shimmy” tour to hone their technique in the field at London’s hottest bars.
Helen Croydon, a journalist for the Times of London, braved the elements and a “Flirt, Schmooze & Shimmy” tour one evening. What she learned will surprise you …
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I met a guy off of a dating website recently. He is actually exactly what I’m looking for. Since we met, he has initiated most of the time we spend together. We talk about solid things — everything from weekend plans to our past relationships, families and goals. We have more in common than I ever expected. I feel great around him and happy, but the catch is he says he just wants to be friends. Although hurt, I told him it was perfectly fine because he’s a great guy and I’d love to stay friends. He looked at me and said, “Great! This means we have more opportunities to hang out — sporting events, movies, comedy shows…” and although he IS a great guy, I do have feelings for him. He totally friend-zoned me and I don’t know why. The only possibility is that he’s not physically attracted to me. I don’t know what to do; do I hang out with him and get over my feelings? Do I give him and our friendship time to see if something develops? We’ve only known each other for two months and it’s been great. I’d love to date him but he’s also admitted in the past to not wanting a relationship until he gets a few things taken care of at work, which will be this summer. What’s his deal? — Wanting More
While I was in NYC, a session with my old shrink told me that I really need to—as much as I hate, hate this expression—“put myself out there” more. “It’s not wrong to want to be in a relationship,” Dr. W reasoned. “It’s unhealthy, however, if you just sit at home all the time and do nothing about it.”
One of the best parts of my college experience at NYU was sampling from the buffet of dudes on campus. It seemed like eligible men were lurking behind every dorm room door, in every lecture hall, and at every bump-and-grind dance party. College life was rife with men, whether they ended up becoming friends or more. There were certainly enough to go around. Apparently, this is not the case for the new generation of college ladies. According to The New York Times, women are totally outnumbering men on campus. The stats say that female enrollment is up to about 57 percent at most major universities (except the Ivys, where men still outnumber women) since the 2000s. So what does that mean for collegiate dating life? It means it’s in crisis. Keep reading »