Speaking of Madonna … on August 5, a company called Gotta Have It! is putting on a rock n’ roll memorabilia auction. A lot of crazy crap is going to be up for grabs, but our favorite items are Madonna’s love letters and super-sexual voice messages to former boy-toy Jim Albright. There are 21 letters total (bidding starts at $3K), plus 17 minutes of voice recordings (bidding starts at $25K), and a 15-minute personal video of Madge shot while she was filming “Dangerous Games” (opening bid, $10K). In all these love tokens, Madonna says some pretty embarrassing things. After the jump, the most cringe-worthy. Keep reading »
The woman was… a living collect-them-all doll collection…. from Jellybean Benitez Madonna to Madonna of the Boy Toy Belt, Unshaved Leaked Photos Madonna, Madonna masturbating on a wedding cake, bouncing beside the waves in “Cherish,” dancing with the little boy in “Open Your Heart,” Who’s That Girl Eyebrows Madonna, Ideal Brunette Madonna (my favorite) saving Black Jesus in that incredible slip, Banned by the Pope! Madonna, “Vogue” Madonna, Fritz Lang Madonna, Wrapped-Plastic Sex-Book Madonna, Shame-Free BDSM Madonna, Sandra Bernhard–BFF Madonna, Bratty Letterman-Taunting Madonna, Self-Mocking Wayne’s World Madonna, the Madonna Who Ate Your Exotic Culture (“Vogue,” “Rain,” “La Isla Bonita”), Abused Sean Penn Madonna of the Helicopters, Contrarian I’m Gonna Keep My Baby Teen-Slut Madonna, Secretly Pregnant While Filming Evita Madonna, Underappreciated Dick Tracy/Sondheim Madonna, Water-Bottle-Fellating Truth or Dare Madonna (with Warren Beatty accessory), Bad Actress Madonna (Wax-Coated/Mamet), Momma Madonna, Kabbalah Esther, British Madge, and on and on….
But soon the bad Madonnas were pouring out in a rush: Lady of the Countryside Madonna, Tone-Deaf Antiwar Madonna, and particularly Hard Body and Plastic Surgery Madonna of the Purple Bodysuit…. There was Never Grow Old Madonna, turning 50. There was Healthy Yoga Madonna, which I couldn’t trust, because she was hard to distinguish from Baby-Cheeks Botox Madonna…
But while other female icons fade, fold, or fossilize into camp, for better or worse, Madonna seems determined to do something unsettling and new: spin to the center of the dance floor, till the end.
- Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have broken up because of conflicting schedules and different life paths. [Dlisted] — What a cop-out excuse! If two people really want to be together, then they’ll find a way to make it work. Maybe Kim is suffering from the “narcissism epidemic.”
- Dang, man! Tony Romo reportedly banned Jessica Simpson from his gated community, but a source says that was pointless because Jessica didn’t want to see him. She paid $19,000 to overnight her stuff from Dallas to L.A. [PopEater] — Well it’s nice to know dudes are just as petty as women. Let’s give them the “you’re crazy” label.
- Bachelorette Jillian made her choice last night on the season finale. We think she played it safe. [The Frisky]
Ahoy, Captain Cuteness! In a truly romantic gesture, Orlando Bloom is refusing to star in a fourth “Pirates of the Caribbean” movie because he wants to spend more time with his girlfriend. Admittedly, most men would opt out of work if their girlfriend were Victoria’s Secret model Miranda Kerr, but still, this kind of decision sounds more out of a chick-flick than real life. Apparently, Orlando’s “love-hiatus” is also his third effort to convince Miranda to be his wife. [Daily Mail]
Come on, Miranda! Turning down a multi-million dollar movie franchise to be with you has got to be a convincing factor. But Orlando is not the only celeb choosing love over all. After the jump our favorite celebrity love-aholics. Keep reading »
If you’re an avid “ANTM” fan like me, then of course you remember the seemingly sweet and likable Cycle 7 winner, Caridee English. I was sympathetic toward her after she revealed her childhood struggle with eczema, and I totally rejoiced when she beat that annoying, know-it-all Melrose. (I can almost hear her awful voice ringing in my ears, “I was so skinny as a child that I had to learn to make my own clothes!”) That’s why I was floored when I found out that Caridee might be America’s Next Top SLOB. An anonymous New Yorker recently outed her, claiming that she sublet her apartment to English and her boyfriend via Craigslist. When she moved back in after a couple of weeks, this unsuspecting victim found her apartment looking like a cross between a sorority house and a mental institution. Now that’s a reality show I’d like to see: “Reality TV Sublets Gone Wrong.” After the jump, the disgusting details of Caridee’s alleged trail of destruction. [Gawker] Keep reading »
Ladies, gentlemen: “Transformers” is not a movie about acting.
I know! It came as a surprise to me, too: I had always believed that “Transformers” aspired to be a sensitive exploration of the human psyche. As it turns out, however, it’s a movie about giant robots fighting each other.
So, no: “Transformers” is many things, but it is not a movie about acting. However, when its star Megan Fox said as much in an interview with Entertainment Weekly, it set off a firestorm of controversy, most of which can be summed up in the title of a post on the blog Zelda Lily (“Feminism in a Bra”): “Megan Fox Is An Ungrateful Bitch.” Keep reading »