Looking back on my wedding planning, I realize how many of my decisions were to make other people happy. My day was special and I felt like the star of the show, but I had to make sure that I stayed in budget so my dad wouldn’t have an aneurysm, that the menu wouldn’t trigger any allergic reactions from my guests, and that the band’s play list would make for a party to remember. But when it came to the honeymoon, there was nobody to think of except me and my new husband, and the closer we got to the wedding, the more I couldn’t wait to get out of town. Endless time for sex, zero calls about headcounts, and did I mention tons of sex? I totally began to understand why people elope. Keep reading »
“Don’t you have a daddy?” the professor sitting across from me asked. I smiled a little. Was he was joking? Or hitting on me? Nope, he was serious and thought my father was paying for my legal education. Though I’ve been independent for years, my law school’s financial aid office had a similar attitude, telling me “ … most students have relatives helping them … ” After a JD, MBA and a third master’s, I’ve found there’s significant latent knowledge about financing grad school, but no one to fill you in. Here’s how it goes … Keep reading »
Not everyone is as lucky as Elizabeth Gilbert, of Eat Pray Love fame, to spend a year in exotic locales to recover from a bad breakup. As a 30-year-old New Yorker returning to singledom after a string of long-term relationships, I can only dream of consulting a Bali guru to show me the right path. With graduate school loans, rising rent, car payments and the need to hold on to my job in this shaky economy, the thought of getting away to reflect and restore seems out of reach and, in Gilbert’s case, very expensive. But it doesn’t have to be. Here, I put together nine affordable things a newly single gal could do to feel better and possibly find love again. Keep reading »
There are necessities, like running water, and then there are “necessities,” like HBO and a weekly pedicure. When you’re single and supporting only yourself, you have every right to declare keeping your toes in the latest shade of blush a priority. But once you join budgets with your partner, it’s important that you both agree on which expenses qualify as non-negotiable.
When my husband and I recently re-evaluated our budget, I was ready to slash the cable bill – we have Netflix, and I tend to watch shows a season or two behind. He balked; he’s an avid Atlanta Braves fan and I didn’t realize that without extended cable he couldn’t catch the games during the (never-ending) baseball season. Similarly, he was willing to eliminate our home telephone, while I hesitated at not having a landline in case of emergencies. Having to make these kind of joint decisions just comes with the territory of a shared address, but compromising can be tricky. Toni Coleman, licensed psychotherapist, relationship coach, and founder of Consum-mate.com, offered this advice about creating a household budget you – and your partner – can live with. Keep reading »
At one point in her life — when she owned a two-bedroom condo, two cars, and enough wedding china to serve two dozen people gazpacho at the same time — Tammy Strobel, 31, asked herself if all that “stuff” actually made her and her husband, Logan, happy.
Then, she gave it all away. Read more … Keep reading »