I’ll tell you where to find eligible, sensitive, loving, manly men are, and that’s Queens, which is like Brooklyn, if Brooklyn didn’t try so hard. This magical borough in New York City is positively thick with emo blog hacks from Texas. But if this gritty urban paradise isn’t convenient, then the next best place to meet men is, you know, wherever. Keep reading »
“Real Housewives of New Jersey” star Melissa Gorga is doing a social experiment this week on “Entertainment Tonight,” walking around the cruel streets of New York City in a fat suit. From 115 pounds to 400 pounds, Melissa’s transformation into an obese woman is meant to teach us a deep and meaningful lesson about discrimination in our society, which we already learned when Tyra Banks and Vanessa Minnillo did the same exact thing. Actually, we learned before that. You know, when we were children and people were mean to those of us who were fat (or different in some way). Oh, Melissa. This stunt is old. Stick to what you’re good at: making club tracks and sparring with your sister-in-law. Why is it that celebs are suckers for a fat suit moment? Click on to see some more famous females who’ve donned them. [Dlisted]
It’s easy to go bonkers around Halloween when every nine-year-old girl on the street dressed like a two-dollar hooker. I find that unnerving as well. But overly-sexy little girls’ costumes get the lion’s share of the attention where there really is a wide range of inappropriate costumes out there. Take, for instance, this Sexy Osama Bin Laden Costume. Too soon, guys. T-o-o s-o-o-n.
After the jump, 14 more costumes that are not for the easily offended. (Which begs the question, why are you on the Internet anyway?) Keep reading »
Does the skin around your eyes sag and cucumber slices and cold spoons just aren’t doing the trick? Don’t worry, wrinkle face, there’s a crazy, bizarre (and likely bulls**t) gadget for that! The Eye Slack Haruka is basically a vibrator for your eyes which, using its highly technologically advanced buzzing and heating powers, vows to take “years off you while lessening those tell-tell weary signs of age.” The downside is it makes you look like a jackass, but who cares? Now, I’m no scientist (although I did get extra credit in high school chemistry because my lap reports were so artistic), but it seems to me that the vibration would actually further loosen skin. Plus, I thought you needed cold temperatures to tighten skin, not heat. I remain unconvinced that this product will do anything about my puffy, sagging undereyes, but at $132 I hope it would at least give me an orgasm. [Japan Trend Shop via Gizmodo]
Look, we all know the drill when it comes to “miraculous” beauty products like the Eye Slack Haruka: You hand over your dollars, hoping for a visible change and get nothing, nada, bupkis. Here are 13 more beauty products that suck. Avoid them at all costs.
As long as I can remember, I haven’t liked change. I preferred to be unhappy or uncomfortable in routine rather than try something new because I was scared or didn’t know the outcome.
In 2009, after two years in non-profit media, rather than look for something new that put my journalism degree to use, I jumped at the chance of a promotion within the company.
Fast forward to 2011, and I was deeply unhappy with my position in Development. Keep reading »
All morning I’ve been listening to Kelly Clarkson’s quite enjoyable new album, Stronger, and found myself laughing aloud at the lyrics to the song ”Einstein. Ahem:
Our love divided by the square root of pride
Multiply your lifeless time
I’m going out of my mind
It was heaven when I finally figured it out alone…
Dumb plus dumb equals you
Dumb plus dumb equals you
Dumb plus dumb equals you
Indeed, there is no better way to tell a man to shove it than to diminish him with some lyrics containing some seriously fuzzy math. Dumb plus dumb equal you, BOO YA!
In honor of Kelly — and my favorite high school calculus teacher — here are some other bad math moments in music history.
Too many guys think I’m a concept, or I complete them, or I’m gonna make them alive. But I’m just a fucked-up girl who’s lookin’ for my own piece of mind; don’t assign me yours.
Michel Gondry’s riveting 2004 film “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” has a special place in my heart. It manages to be all at once uplifting, darkly hilarious, and depressing in its aching realism. Jim Carrey (as Joel Barish) is like you’ve never seen him before, a rare, thought-provoking talent who feels, really feels, the deeeeep misery of anyone who has ever fallen madly in love only to have their heart shattered. His girlfriend Clementine, portrayed so effectively by Kate Winslet, is neurotic and impulsive, but you’ll soon learn that there is so much beauty to be found in instability. The disjointed manner of the film sees Clementine through a rainbow of hair colors, ages, and personalities, each more unhinged than the last. First, find out how to channel her cavalier, colorful persona this Halloween, and then check out four other character-driven Halloween costumes. Keep reading »
We asked and you came through! We’ve got some of your best pet costumes and adorable animals on view. Click through to check out all the cute furballs. Keep reading »
I probably won’t win too many fans with this statement, but it’s been on my mind for the past few years. I don’t think second-, third-, fourth-time etc. moms should have a baby shower for every pregnancy. The baby shower should be reserved for new moms only!
Keep reading »
I had an abortion when I was 21. It was my senior year of college. I was living in NYC, working nights as an exotic dancer while interning during the day at a grassroots nonprofit for disadvantaged girls. I was cheating on my long distance boyfriend, we were having unprotected sex and I got pregnant. I was lying to everyone about everything. I was a total shit show: three perfect words to describe Cat Marnell, the xoJane editor who caught flack last week for a post she wrote about using Plan B as her primary form of birth control.
When I think back to the young woman I was then, I want to shake her. I want to shame her. I am angry at a woman who should’ve known better- who did know better, I find myself thinking even now — but who chose, instead, to know nothing. I was stupid and reckless and selfish, self absorbed and intent on my ways. The abortion wasn’t the worst of it, only a symptom of a greater sorrow. Simply put, I needed help.
Keep reading »