Whether your summer breakup still stings, your fall heartbreak feels fresh, or your holiday heartache has yet to happen, one thing’s for sure. The holiday season is here and dealing with a broken heart can be especially tough during these “feel good” months. After all, there are holiday gatherings to attend, mistletoe to stand under (GASP – alone!), and happy couples cozying up to one another wherever you turn.
Even with your broken heart, you can still enjoy the holidays this year. Here are some tried and true tips for surviving and thriving the holiday season following a breakup. Read more…
Guest columnists and contributors are generously sharing their talents and insights while I’m taking some time to care for my new baby. Today’s letter is answered by freelance writer, Rachel East, AKA ReginaRey.
About six months ago, the man I thought I was going to marry left me unceremoniously for another woman. During the aftermath – the moving out and settling of affairs — he acted cruelly and horribly, cementing the split and making damn sure I didn’t come back. I spent much of the next few months depressed, having constant nightmares about him, unable to get out of bed and constantly self-medicating, because the reality of my situation was too much to face. I work freelance, and have been accepting just enough work to scrape by, wishing the end of every gig to come so I could get back into bed. Keep reading »
The holidays are the worst when it comes to breakups. If you’re in a relationship that’s in the pits, it’s often difficult to extract yourself from it in time to avoid having to get your unwanted significant other a present. So if your New Year’s resolution is to be single and mingling in 2012, we’ve got a few gift suggestions that will help give your boyfriend a clue of what’s to come.
One of the most difficult ordeals a guy can face is the delicate matter of ending a relationship that his girlfriend still wants to continue, especially if he still cares for her. There are some good ways to go about it, but infinitely more bad ones, and I’ve certainly plumbed the latter category more times than I’d like to admit over the years. So, in the interests of sparing men (and women) the mistakes I’ve made, here’s what I’ve learned from my past. Keep reading »
“I think we should break-up.”
“I don’t love you anymore.”
“We aren’t right for each other.”
Breakups can leave the lovelorn rattled for weeks, months and sometimes even years. But there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Grieving a relationship is not unlike grieving a death. It’s healing process. But one day, you will move on.
“The key to getting through a breakup is accepting that you are going to be a crazy maniac for the next three to six months of your life,” says Elina Furman, relationship expert and author of Kiss and Run: The Single, Picky and Indecisive Girl’s Guide to Overcoming Her Fear of Commitment. “There’s no skipping steps so even if you think you’re over it right away, you’re probably not.”
If you’re recently single, fasten your seatbelt. These five stages of grief can get pretty rocky. Read more…
Exes are exes for a reason. You have to remember that, even when you miss them — like I did this past week.
You may remember the crappy ex in question — the one who broke up with me over IM, stole a painting he’d given me as a present and generally made me feel like total crap for several months. Our breakup was quick and sharp (over IM, after all), but the months leading up to it were painful and heartbreaking. He was miserable and so was I.
Keep reading »
“It was tricky in that we split up and had to remain in a band. Whenever we play music together, it’s f**kin’ intimate, there’s no two ways about it. You cannot sing with someone and not be intimate. It just doesn’t work, and that’s why I’m not playing in the band right now. I’m still in the band, but I’m not playing with Mar right now. … [T]he one thing that me and Mar have always been with each other is very honest. Mar needed to move in the direction she moved, I needed to move in the direction I moved, but we’re still very good. The saddest thing that could happen out of all of this is that we’d stop being friends. That’s the worst-case scenario. If me and her are still buddies … you know, she’s had to deal with discomfort, too. She’s had to deal with me making decisions that have hurt her. So Mar getting married is something that I think is very good for her. If I could say anything about Marketa, it’s that this really suits her personality. To get married with someone who loves and respects her and who she loves and respects, to me, makes total sense. I’m very happy for her, genuinely. And I really like Tim, he’s a f**king gentleman.”
— If you didn’t fall in love with Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova falling in love with each other in “Once,” then, well, we recommend you get that checked out. But after the bandmates of The Swell Season won an Oscar for their song “Falling Slowly” — while being filmed for a documentary about the band, in fact — Glen and Marketa drifted apart from each other and ended their relationship. Now Marketa is married to a member of the Swell Season crew and Glen … well, Glen is pretty freaking mature about it, all things considered. Keep reading »