Skin woes: I am intimately familiar with them. I enjoyed the first two decades of my life with a face as smooth, pale, and unblemished as an egg shell. I fielded endless compliments about the condition and clarity of my perfect skin, as well as many an elderly person croaking in my general direction that I “SHOULD NEVER GO OUT IN THE SUN.” And when old people tell you things, you listen. Then, about a year ago, everything changed. (I would appreciate if somebody could please hold my hand while I talk about this.) While in the past I hadn’t weathered much more than a whitehead or two every so often, I started developing swollen, excruciatingly painful cystic acnes (not a scientific term) that would never come out from underneath my skin. They would just linger there, taunting me, until I hauled ass to the dermatologist and got them injected with cortisone for the small price of an insurance copay.
The story does not end here. I guess my previously perfect skin had just had it with me, or the fact that all I ever seemed to be doing was eating Chinese food and chain-smoking (ugh, I know, I was sick of me too), because it hasn’t been the same since, even despite my having made some significant Lifestyle Changes. I definitely don’t get as many terrible cysts as I used to, praise god, but my face is full of texture and other stuff that I don’t like. Because my number one priority is always, without fail, presenting what I like to refer to as “a united front,” I got really, really good at concealer instead of sitting around looking in the mirror and crying about it. Just kidding, I sat in front of the mirror and cried about it first, then I got really good at concealer. Keep reading »
Samantha Brick, meet Laura Fernee, another woman afflicted by the same horrid condition as you — being too beautiful. You two could start a mutual self-appreciation society. Fernee said she quit her job as a medical researcher because she’s too pretty, and her male colleagues were constantly harassing her.
“I wanted them to recognise my achievements and my professionalism but all they saw was my face and body,” complained Fernee toBritish paper The Mirror. “I was constantly asked out on dates, or found romantic gifts and notes at my desk. I found it sleazy and uncomfortable. Even when I was in a laboratory in scrubs with no make-up they still came on to me because of my natural attractiveness.”
And the women? The women were much worse.
Keep reading »
I’ll spend 45 minutes (easy) perfecting my cat-eye in the morning, but I stopped “doing” my hair before I even started. I have a long, plentiful mane (seriously, it is a mane) that takes an entire day to dry naturally and an hour to blow-dry, so I’ve always been the type to wash it at night, sleep on it, and work with whatever weird lumps and bumps have developed come morning. Now, I like to think that I am the pioneer of what I’m about to divulge to you, but that is highly unlikely; I just happened to figure it out for myself. (But also I’ve never been the pioneer of anything before so please just let me have this.)
If you have shoulder-length hair or longer, and would like for this hair to dry into smooth, perfect waves with literally no effort or styling whatsoever, FOLLOW ME. (Also, if you haven’t listened to the album An Awesome Wave by alt-J, go do that. But first, follow me!) Keep reading »
Hey, do you think this lip gloss ad from Vbeauté might have anything to do with … well … vaginas? Nah. What about that dress? No vaginas there either, right? [Refinery29]
Beyonce sure has a lot going on lately (and, um, all the time): a massive tour, a controversial trip to Cuba, a rumored second pregnancy… But regardless of how much Queen Bey has on her plate, she never misses a beat when it comes to looking flawless, whether she’s rolling in to a Nets game or a red carpet event. Mrs. Carter’s flame-embellished gown at the Met Ball was a polarizing choice, but her makeup for the evening? Universally gorgeous. A few tips and tricks, after the jump… Keep reading »
They aren’t the sexiest or most exciting beauty product — not by a long shot — but facial wipes are an absolute necessity. If you’re prone to late-night laziness or, um, unforeseen sleepovers, a pack thrown in your purse can mean the difference between a fresh face and eyeliner on your cheeks in the morning. As a longtime connoisseur of both crashing wherever and staying out all night, I’ve found myself at many a drugstore closely examining the best of their cleansing wipe offerings. Given that my skin is, at any given point in time, either congested and acne-prone, red and irritated, or dry as the desert, I have purchased and tried approximately All Of Them. Here are my 5 top choices in the category… Keep reading »
I don’t know if I’ve ever mentioned this before, but I am Pale. Like, really pale, so pale it warrants a capital P for emphasis. I glow under black lights; practically all of my veins and arteries are peeking through my flesh braying for you to notice them; when I go out in public without makeup on perfect strangers ask me if I am okay. (I am fine.) However, I will melt in direct sunlight, and the fake bronze look of artificial tanning just does not appeal to me, so I long ago fully embraced my fairness with open (white) arms. In fact, I quite like it, and I quietly resent anyone, friend or foe, who tells me off-handedly that I “need a tan.” No, I don’t — I just need a little bit of bronzer, and then I’m back to looking human again.
I’m a dope hand at contouring because I’m obsessssssed with cheekbones, but my full-face bronzing technique leaves something to be desired (I stick a huge, fluffy brush in the pan and just slap it all over my face, whatever). Consider this remedial how-to my effort at learning with you.
Keep reading »
When the weather is warm and sticky, the last thing you want to do is wear your hair down. A typical ponytail or topknot gets old fast, so why not take a cue from one of these pretty ponytails? Tossed to the side or roughed up at the crown, your summer look can go from basic to bomb in seconds flat. Draw some inspiration from these 10 celebs …
Why would you care about the beauty products your mom uses? Because look at your mom! She looks great! She must be doing something right. We’ve picked some of the beauty products our moms — and probably yours — use. Take a look and go slap some of that cold cream on. Keep reading »
Exhibit A: I am not an expert on tanning, or anything even remotely having to do with tanning. My skin glows under those neon lights at the bowling alley. I am, however, sort of an expert (I flatter myself) on faking a healthy summer glow, when the last thing I am in actuality is healthy and/or glowing. Yep, I’m a bronzer connoisseur, and not Snooki-style — I’m all about all bronzers subtle, sheer, and “natural”-looking. Basically, anything that will help me to look less like I just clawed my way out of a mole tunnel. Whether you’re pale pale pale like I am, or just in need of a boost, these 5 bronzers will let the light in … Keep reading »