Profile for Wendy Atterberry

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http://www.citywendy.com

Dear Wendy: “I Could Never Date A Man Who’s Hired A Hooker”

As a feminist, I’m on the fence about prostitution being legalized. On one hand, I do not feel that is is right or OK for a woman to just sell her body for a price. On the other, if prostitution is legalized, women can be a lot safer and get off the streets, making it easier for cops to catch pimps and sex slave holders. Though I feel this way, I could not be with a man or woman who has ever bought somebody for sex, especially if that person was a woman. The thought of them thinking that it’s totally OK to go up and buy a human being as if she were an object just does not sit well with me. There is no other way around it, if I found out that someone went to a prostitute, it would be a dealbreaker. I know a guy who is a widower and goes to one and he says he just does not have time for a relationship so he goes to these legal places for sex. I can see his point, but I’d want a man who would treat women with the same respect and care that he would want the women in his life to have for men. Am I stupid for feeling this way? — Feminist Against Prostitution

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Dear Wendy Updates: “Once Bitten” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Once Bitten” who began an affair with an engaged man who had already dumped her once for the woman he would later propose to. “I know that the typical advice is ‘they never leave their wife,’ but I have loved this guy since we met and keep hoping that he’ll ‘choose me.’ When I’m with him, I always tell myself that being in love with him is enough. Then he goes home and my heart breaks,” she wrote. After the jump, find out if her boyfriend indeed chose her or if she finally got the courage to leave him for good. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “What’s The REAL Reason He Doesn’t Want To Date Me?”

A week ago I met a really nice guy and we hit it off right away. We both are newly single and expressed to one another that we were just looking for someone to go out and spend time with. We went on our first official date a couple of days ago and it went very well. I was pretty certain that we’d see each other again because at certain moments during the date he would make references to future dates. Well, a few hours after the date he texted me saying that while he had a nice time with me and liked me he wasn’t ready for any kind of commitment and wanted to keep his options open. He also said that he felt like if we continued to see one another we’d likely end up in a serious relationship, and that that’s not what he wants right now. I know the answer here should be obvious to me, but it just really sucks! I have never connected this soon with someone before and we had a great first date and I could tell he was into me, but now suddenly I’m rejected because he likes me too much? He said he didn’t want to hurt me and that I deserve a lot more than he can give me right now. Do you think he was he being genuine and really looking out for me? Or was this just his way of saying he’s not into me without actually saying it? — Bummed After First Date

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Dear Wendy: “I Don’t Want Kids, But My Live-In Boyfriend Does. Are We Doomed?”

I have been in a wonderful relationship with my boyfriend for about a year and a half. We moved in together about a year ago and it has been going great! He is financially responsible (although we both deal with school loan debt), fun to be around, and has a great family. We have talked about getting married in the next few years and buying house, and I would love to be his wife for the rest of my life. But … I don’t ever want to have kids. Now, I know I am only 25 (as is he) so we have a ways before I have to start thinking about it, however, he is very family-oriented and has mentioned his desire to someday take a child with him to sports games. I made it clear to him that I have always wanted to adopt or foster older children rather than have my own kids but he has never really stated an opinion on that option. I’m worried that if we get married, he will make the assumption (as many do) that I will want kids eventually, and will start putting the pressure on me when we get closer to 30/35 at which point we’ll get divorced if I still don’t want kids. Is it safe to stay in a relationship with such a big difference of opinion, or the hope that I “might” someday change my mind? Is it too early to have a serious talk with him about it? I love him but am scared this is going to be the end of us. — No Kids, Please

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Dear Wendy Updates: “165 And Ready To Run” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “165 And Ready To Run,” whose boyfriend confessed to her that he was really bothered by her 8-pound weight gain and it was the reason he had been seeming distant. “Since he told me, he has been affectionate and loving again; he says he just needed to get it off his chest and now everything will be fine. But I’m pissed. Is it worth it for me to put up with his shallowness?” After the jump, find out whether she decided to keep putting up with his shallowness or if she MOA’d. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Refuses To Introduce Me To His Friends And Family”

My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months, but he won’t let me meet his friends or his family. He has told me his friends dislike me for the sole reason that I am his girlfriend. It’s not even that I take up too much of his time — he see’s them every day and I only see him one day a week. His friends haven’t met me, yet they try to start fights with me and are mean to me on Facebook. I asked him to please tell them to stop saying mean things to me on Facebook, but he won’t. Instead, he says to me “Stop being silly. Who cares?” Well, I care. One day we were in his bedroom, and we heard some of his friends in the living room with his roommate; I was gonna go out and say hello but my boyfriend said to me “No, they will rip your head off.” I just hate it. I’m not allowed to meet them, he lets them talk bad about me to his face and on the internet, and when I get mad, it’s all my fault. Another thing is I’m kept separate from his family. He has met mine but won’t let me meet his. One day we drove to his house and he just sat outside in the car. I said let’s go inside and say hello, but he wouldn’t. I had to sit in the car. What do I do? What does this all mean? — Kept in the Dark

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