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John Travolta’s Baby Will Destroy Us All

At only two months old, John Travolta and Kelly Preston’s new baby Ben was already flying planes back in January. Since then he’s taught himself the piano and will probably move on to advanced military strategies if I’m reading this right. “Extra” reports:

“The baby was playing this tiny piano we got him, and we were so blown away!” Preston said. “A lot of times kids will bang it, but he was using his fingers.”

While Scientologists have a long-documented history of pulling shit straight out of their ass (See: The New Yorker exposing the church’s penchant for rampant forgery including L. Ron Hubbard’s military records.), I think it’s safe to say we’re witnessing the early years of their new Messiah. I mean, Christ, he’s flying planes and playing pianos at barely half a year old! Read more… Keep reading »

Charlie Sheen Is A Wizard

Charlie Sheen has apparently convinced Brooke Mueller to move into a mansion in his neighborhood so it’s easier for him to see his kids between coke sandwiches and is even working on getting Denise Richards in on the same deal. So basically he’s taking Clam Manor in a less alarming direction – for now. He’s very persuasive. RadarOnline reports:

According to a source close to the situation Charlie wants to buy BOTH of his exes, Brooke and Denise Richards mansions at the swanky gated complex, Mullholland Estates, where he currently resides.

And Brooke Mueller is extremely keen on the idea, as a source tells RadarOnline.com exclusively that she is “planning on taking Charlie up on his very generous offer. Brooke thinks its a great idea because Charlie can see their twin sons on a daily basis.

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