Profile for Steph Auteri

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Sex With Steph: I’m Married And My Sex Life Sucks

“I met my husband when I was 20 (he was 25). We dated for eight years, and then got married last year. I was totally insecure when we met. I stayed pretty insecure through most of my 20s. We went through some pretty rough times together (family deaths, job losses, etc). He’s a wonderful person and I could not have survived the tough times without him. But, I know I stayed in the relationship because I was afraid to leave. I was also a virgin when we started dating. We finally hit a smooth patch and decided to get married. Now, I’m regretting it.”

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Sex With Steph: It Hurts When I Have Sex

I’ll get right to it: I seem to be hymenally/orgasmically challenged, and I’m wondering if you can shed any enlightenment on what goes on for me. I enjoy all the sexy activities and play time, but I rarely am able to achieve orgasm. I don’t receive any stimulation from my clitoris being touched or vibrated against, there’s a little sensation when firm pressure is applied, but that’s about it. So masturbation and oral sex are sort of a dud for me. Intercourse seems to be the only way I receive pleasure, and from what I’ve deduced it’s my G-spot that’s liking the attention. However, the more intense the stimulation tends to be, it also feels oddly painful at the same time internally (sort of like cramps or a tummy ache) so most of the time I can’t climax because of the discomfort. My gynecologist has always assured me she doesn’t see anything wrong “down there” so I’m not worried about that. I’m pretty open about my sex life with my friends. None of them have ever experienced anything like this, and I’ve never read about anything like this before. Is this a common problem for some women? Am I alone here? Would love some feedback if you have it.

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Sex With Steph: How Do I Use Sex Toys With My Boyfriend?

Hi Steph! I just started dating a guy like a month ago. One night in bed he mentioned that he would be open to using sex toys. I love my toys as much as the next girl, but I’m afraid my rabbit would be intimidating since it is bigger than he is. I have never been with a guy who was open to using sex toys during sex…so I am in uncharted territory here. Any thoughts or advice? – SexToyClueless

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Sex With Steph: My Boyfriend Has A Low Sex Drive

My boyfriend of over a year has lost almost all of his sex drive. I’ve tried the typical methods (lingerie, porn, alcohol, sexy messages/talk, etc.) to get him interested in sex and have had less than a 20 percent success rate (which results in a 35 percent erection, at best). He insists that there’s no unresolved issues or problems and that the interest is there but physical desire is not. In spite of his lack of interest in sex, my libido is through the roof and out of control. The question isn’t whether or not to cheat or leave — it’s how can I get my guy’s battery recharged??? — Female with blue balls

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First Time For Everything: Sex Parties Helped Me Overcome My Intimacy Issues

I double-checked my bag: Wallet, bus pass, lip gloss. A bottle of cheap wine. A variety pack of condoms. My favorite vibrator and a pair of handcuffs.

My husband and I were attending our very first sex party and — by God — I wanted us to be prepared.

I wasn’t sure what to expect that evening. My libido levels had been low as of late, and intimacy with my husband was suffering. As someone who often relied upon a vibrator, was I really planning on possibly masturbating in public? Were Michael and I actually going to pull out that set of never-before-used handcuffs in a public setting? Was I going to allow myself to actually feel something? Keep reading »

10 Ways To Be Unproductive In The New Year

It’s already two weeks into the New Year, and people are still being all motivated and productive and infuriatingly resolved. One friend is detoxing with her boyfriend, while another is spending five hours a week volunteering for Unicef. Another is playing the piano at his local nursing home, and yet another has upped her hours at work, in an attempt to snag a promotion. And then there’s your co-worker, who has stopped using credit cards, and can therefore no longer accompany you to Banana Republic after work. How insufferable! At a time when everyone is toiling and laboring and spending 40 minutes a day on the elliptical machine, isn’t it time you made a promise to yourself to be…unproductive? More after the jump… Keep reading »

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