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10 Signs She’s A High-Maintenance Girlfriend

10 Signs She's A High-Maintenance Girlfriend

Women who demand respect often get exactly that. And why shouldn’t they? We not only deserve it, we should expect it. But there’s a tipping point when a woman’s demands jump the shark from self-respecting to totally high maintenance, or, as I like to call it, highmay. There are the obvious one-name offenders: Madonna and her overnight full body saran wrapping, Cher and her multiple costume changes. And then there are women who demand maintenance in ways that are less obvious, but just as lethal. She is “the worst kind,” as Harry so clearly explained to Sally. “You’re high maintenance but you think you’re low.” So girls and guys, I’m going to be like your cool older sister who bought your sorry 15-year-old ass beer from the Quickmart and offer you a few tips on how to preemptively spot a high-maintenance girlfriend. Because those dudes I described yesterday have company. Gals, you can write your seemingly benign behaviors off as girly or cute, or you can see them for what they are—blinking red lights indicating you’re about to take the onramp to the highmay highway. Guys, ignore the warning signs at your peril—unless, of course, you’re a glutton for punishment; then ending up with a woman who’s just like your highmay mother is probably inevitable.

10 Gay Celebrity Couples Who Have Kids

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On Christmas day, Sir Elton John became a proud father, just like Joseph did oh so many years ago, minus the fact that Christmas wasn’t Jesus’ real birthday. Elton and his husband David Furnish welcomed Zachary Jackson Levon Furnish-John into the world with the help of a surrogate. It’s about time that Elton got his own tiny dancer. Sorry, Jess, I stole your joke. [Washington Post]

And for anyone who thinks gay people don’t make awesome parents, we’ve rounded up a few other gay (as in joyous) families!

The 14 Ladies Who’ve Posed For Playboy The Most

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Pamela Anderson is all about innovation. That’s why the buxom blonde will be on her 13th Playboy cover this January (top left). The 43-year-old has claimed the record for the most covers by one woman and the magazine has promised that she will be naked in the “Dolce Vita”-inspired photo shoot, which was shot at the Playboy mansion grotto in October. Apparently, along with the pictorial spread, Anderson voiced her support for Barack Obama and wrote a poem that went something like this, “Our best isn’t good enough — right now our eyes are far-reaching … Please let’s show the good in us… The brilliance… The wonderful… It’s abundant — it’s just not tapped as it should be.” I think Pam’s been as tapped as she could possibly be at this point, but kudos to her for having the bod to span decades of covers, since her first Playboy cover in 1989. I think her best one was in 1993, when she posed with Dan Aykroyd. [Celebitchy] Anyway, even though she holds the records, plenty of ladies have graced multiple covers and deserve their own accolades.

10 Of Hollywood’s Hottest Lesbians Under 35

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Actress Amber Heard, aka Seth Rogen‘s girlfriend in “Pineapple Express” and Johnny Depp‘s co-star in the upcoming flick “The Rum Diary,” came out at this weekend’s GLAAD 25th anniversary! The actress said she wondered if staying in the closet was contributing to “millions of hard-working, tax paying Americans” being denied their rights. The gorgeous young actress walked the red carpet with her equally attractive partner, Tasya van Ree, and said, “I think GLAAD is one of the many reasons that I, as a 24-year-old, can come out.” It’s super awesome that Amber is being heard (heh) and that she came out of the closet at such a young age when so many in Hollywood seem to wait until they’re outed. [Queerty] In celebration, we’ve rounded up some of the hottest lesbian celebs under the age of 35!

10 Celebrity Couples Who Got Matching Tattoos … And Then Broke Up

Celebrity Couples Who Got Matching Tattoos ... And Then Broke Up

Love might be slightly less permanent than we’re taught to believe from fairy tales, but there are some things that last forever-ish. Like tattoos. History has shown that when celeb couples get matching tattoos, it’s a bad omen. Kelsey Grammer tempted fate this weekend when he he got his wife’s name “Kayte” inked on his waistline. Kayte Walsh didn’t go under the gun quite yet. Perhaps she’s planning to reciprocate with a matching tat once the twins are born … or once the ink is dry on his divorce papers. But once she does, they are in grave danger of splitting. I’m thinking tattoo parlors should instigate a rule where they only ink up celeb couples who have made it more than 20 years together, but then again, there’s always Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. I guess the celeb tattoo removal and cover-up business is good for the economy.  We’ve rounded up couples who got ink together but didn’t stay together as a warning to Kelsey Grammer and Kayte Wlash … and all of us. Don’t do it, people! [People]

Oksana Grigorieva, J-Woww, And Other Celebs Who’ve Said No To Playboy Offers

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Jenni J-Woww Farley might wear bedazzled boy-shorts as if they were pants, but she isn’t about to take them off for Playboy. She has turned down a request to pose for the mag, even though the offer was reportedly for $400,000. JWoww said, “I am not going to do Playboy in the near future… There is a better opportunity out there, which everybody will probably see soon.” Most think this “better opportunity” is a possible “Jersey Shore” spin-off show with her bestie, Snooki. Which makes us want to eat a pickle. [Huffington Post]

I guess we will just have to rely on our imaginations if we want to see J-Woww sans clothes. In her honor, here are some other ladies who turned down Playboy.

11 Celebrity Couples Who Didn’t Have Prenups

11 Celebrity Couples Who Didn't Have Prenups

“I want to make our wedding just about me and her loving each other. We want to get married in front of our friends and family and keep it normal. It ain’t about selling the pictures, it ain’t about doing no prenup.”

That’s what Russell Brand had to say back in October 2010, just days before he wed Katy Perry in an extravagant ceremony in India. Now, of course, it seems like Brand lucked out, at least financially. Last Friday, the comedian filed for divorce from Katy Perry (who didn’t want to file herself and offend her extremely religious parents) and the couples’ assets are up for grabs. Brand apparently stands to make, gulp, an estimated $20 million from the pop star’s fortune because, under California law, the state’s community property clause splits money and property acquired during the union 50/50 when there isn’t a prenup. Someone should have told Katy that rich “California Girls” cover their assets before walking down the aisle. It remains to be seen, of course, how this will actually play out in court and whether Brand will actually go for “his” half of Katy’s fortune. [Hollywood Life]

After the jump, more celebs who got married sans prenups. Spoiler alert: Most of their stories don’t end so well.

9 Celebrity Couples In Open Relationships

Celebrity Couples In Open Relationships

According to The National Enquirer, Rachael Ray’s husband, John Cusimano, is a regular patron of an exclusive, members-only NYC swingers club called Checkmate. What a great name, by the way. But back to their marriage. Cusimano was allegedly a member at Checkmate since before he married Ray seven years ago. Sources say he’s been spotted at the club at least six times, but never with Rachael.

“After a bit of socializing at the buffet and the bar, John would always make his way to the back room. And every time he was observed in the coed locker room, he never took a shower alone. He’d always stop by the club’s buffet before closing to grab a few bagels for the road.”

OK. I can no longer take this story seriously because of the bit about the bagels. He’s married to Rachael Ray, does he really need to pilfer bagels from a swingers club when he can just go home and have one of her 30-minute meals? I’m not buying it. Either way, having an open relationship is no big deal. Lots of couples do it successfully. Click through to see some more famous folks who are open to being open. [Dlisted]

8 Celebrity Couples Who Did Babies Before Marriage

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The saying goes “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage.” But celebrities do whatever the hell they want and sometimes just flip it. Just this weekend, our favorite jack***, Johnny Knoxville, married his girlfriend of two years, Naomi Nelson, just two days after proposing to her. However, the two welcomed son Rocko Akira Clapp last December. Knoxville, whose real name is Philip John Clapp, also has a teenage daughter from his previous 11-year marriage. [Celebrity Mania]

Knoxville is in pretty good company with other celebs who had kids and tied the knot later on. More after the jump.

6 Low-Key Celebrity Couples Who’ve Been Together Forevs

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