Okay, fine, her skin looks amazing, but I really want to come at Tay Tay with some cotton swabs, makeup remover, and a blending brush right about now, because all that rust eyeshadow is making her look rather corpse-y. On the plus side, her breasteses look fab! Harry Styles, boy, eat your clam-loving heart out.
Behold, “trainer to the stars,” close friend of Gwyneth Paltrow, and all-around jerk Tracy Anderson! This is the very same Tracy Anderson who believes she can “redesign” every body into a “teeny tiny dancer type” regardless of genetics, blames pregnant women and new mothers for “letting their bodies go,” and thinks that they could all really benefit from buying her exercise DVD. Especially that Kate Middleton. Now, I don’t much care for Tracy, but I do know this: she may consider herself an authority on fitness, but she is definitely not an authority on practical footwear.
I’ve done a pretty good job of convincing myself that I bear a certain resemblance to universal girlcrush Rachel Weisz. Nobody aside from myself has ever suggested that to me, but we have similar (large) noses, so I kind of took that idea and ran with it. Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t see it. Anyway, she always looks so freakin’ elegant, like she’s from another era. A cooler era! This Bottega Veneta dress fits her perfectly, the rust color is super-flattering to her complexion, and she’s pulling off that generally awkward below-the-knee length so well. Which shouldn’t be surprising, because I am pretty sure Mrs. James Bond can pull off aaaaaanything. I know, I know, she’s an incredibly talented and successful actress in her own right, not just someone’s wife… but she’s also Mrs. James Bond.
There are some fashion designers who have managed to attain celebrity status based on their individual personas in conjunction with their brand. Exhibit A: Karl Lagerfeld, the kooky, perpetually politically incorrect, semi-unintentionally hilarious Chanel designer and cat owner for whom I have set a Google Alert. But for every Karl Lagerfeld there’s 20 big-time designers who prefer to fly under the radar in varying degrees — some simply maintain a low profile while others don’t claim much of a profile at all (seriously, who is Martin Margiela and what does he look like?). And then there’s Roberto Cavalli. I had no idea just how eccentric the Italian designer was, but if the clothes say anything about the man, his unrepentantly outlandish collections and penchant for all things wild should have clued me in long ago.
Leave it to Harper’s Bazaar to profile Cavalli in their glorious “24 Hours with…” segment, which has me all but convinced that he would make the best crazy grandpa of all time. After the jump, a bit of insight into Cavalli’s average day… but I highly recommend reading the entire piece. You won’t regret it. [Fashionista] Keep reading »
If money were no object, I would probably be covered in gold, Midas-style. Actually, much less like Midas and way more like this Indian man who had a shirt made for himself using $230,888 worth of solid gold. To attract a wife. As you do. I guess I’m not that materialistic, but I do like nice stuff, and what’s nicer than gold, am I right?
Soon, people who like gold as much as I do will be able to put it somewhere it’s never been before (sorry, gold-plated dildos have been a thing for a while): in their hair! And not even like just an accessory; it will actually go in the hair itself. And not only will it be a testament to how filthy rich you are, it will also turn your white hair dark brown, for good, or at least until it grows out. That’s what science says! Keep reading »