Profile for Rachel Krause

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The First Full-Length Trailer For Spring Breakers Is Seriously Nuts

James' Poetry Book
James Franco sold a book of poetry and the world weeps. Read More »
Selena And Bieber Split
Selena Gomez
Young love is dead, whatever whatever. Read More »
Emma Loves James
Check out Emma Roberts' T-shirt professing her love for James Franco. Read More »

The long-awaited “Spring Breakers” trailer has hit the web, and nothing I say could even come close to doing it justice. Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens, Ashley Benson, and Rachel Korine star in Harmony Korine’s latest vehicle as four bored college students who will do anything to go ham on spring break, and you can count on them looking nothing like they did at the premiere (above). A RiFF RaFF-channeling James Franco sports cornrows as rapper/drug dealer Alien, and I have no idea who Gucci Mane plays but he is most definitely in this movie. I think it looks rad — much better than expected, actually — and I can’t wait to see squeaky-clean Selena get her sleaze on. Ch-ch-check it out. Y’all wanna die tonight? [MTV] Keep reading »

Snoop Dogg Makes A Pretty Good Case For French Man-icures

Snoop's Daughter Sings!
Her music video is good, clean fun. Read More »
Snoop For Hot Pockets
A completely understandable endorsement. Read More »
Snoop What?
We can't keep track anymore. Read More »
Snoop And Cameron Diaz
What's their connection? Oh, he sold her weed once in high school. Read More »

Snoop Dogg Snoop Lion Snoop is a pretty confident guy, and he has every reason to be. He’s super rich, super talented, super handsome, and famous as hell. Like, so famous. The famousest. There are a lot of things I like about Snoop, but I think what I like the most is that he’s got the mind to decide, “You know what, I’m gonna rock some French tips today,” and he does it. He just goes ahead and does it. Hey, Snoop: call me. [Instagram]

Scott Disick’s Secret Modeling Past, Revealed

Dating A Douche?
Thirteen signs that you're dating a douche. Read More »
All Hail Lord Disick
Complete with a vanity cane. Read More »
Scott On Kourtney
Her design sense is out of "Beetlejuice." Read More »

I have a bizarre limerence for Scott Disick, the vaguely threatening, Patrick Bateman-esque father of Kourtney Kardashian‘s children. Maybe it’s because I’m from New England, but Disick’s combination of slick, preppy rich-boy style, unapologetic dogmatism, and self-reverential charm is exactly what I look for in someone to both lust after and loathe. What I didn’t realize, however, is that I’ve actually been crushing on Scott for ten years. Say whaaaaat. Keep reading »

Did Somebody Say Rare White Lion Cubs?

Baby Panda Checkup
baby panda
Watch Xiao Liwu the baby panda get her checkup. Read More »
Babies!

White lions are incredibly rare: a majority of their population is kept in zoos because of a (recently-dispelled) belief that they could not survive in the wild, and another large part are bred in South African camps for “canned hunting” purposes, which makes me want to say, “Fuck this whole being human thing.” There are only about 200 of them in the world, but these numbers got a healthy boost recently when twin female white lions gave birth to six cubs between them. They are, as you can imagine, to die for — and it’s easy to see why indigenous African priests recognize these beautiful creatures as direct messengers of the divine. Check out the cubs in this video, then hop on over to White Lions Homeland to learn more, and see what you can do to protect their future. [BuzzFeed]

Andy Milonakis And David Arquette Play With Beef For “Makeshift Gourmet”

Courteney And David Show
Are the exes creating a show about the relationship? Read More »
A Funny Rape Joke?
jamie kilstein
Jamie Kilstein tells one. Read More »
You probably won't die.

I like to think of myself as a very refined person with very refined tastes. Sure, I watch reruns of “Kourtney & Khloe Take Miami” on the treadmill, and you may find the errant Rihanna hit on my iPod. I also enjoy a Mike’s Hard Lemonade from time to time, and have a hard time cutting an apple. But besides all that stuff, I am an intellectual, a sophisticate, an epicurean, and a scholar. Yep. All of those. Which is exactly why I am so disgustingly ashamed by how much I enjoy the comedic stylings (if you could call it that) of Andy Milonakis, the former star of MTV’s “The Andy Milonakis Show,” who is instantly recognizable due in part to a growth-hormone condition that renders him forever 12. Aside from being one third of hip-hop group ¡Three Loco! alongside RiFF RaFF and Dirt Nasty, Milonakis is the host of a new web series, a cooking show called “Makeshift Gourmet.” The first installment chronicles Andy as he puts a high-end spin on Hamburger Helper using “elevated ingredients,” and better still, the weirdness of it all is punctuated by the appearance of a giggly, sunglasses-clad David Arquette, who eats raw Wagyu beef before participating in a “beef slap.” God love ya, Andy. And David, too. [Huffington Post]

Beauty Cues: Rose Byrne’s Simple Shaded Eyes

Rose Byrne!
Who is she anyway? Read More »
Well Played: Rose
These faux suspender straps are subtly sexy. Read More »

I’m pretty sure Rose Byrne could make clown makeup look ultra-glam, but that doesn’t mean that this simple contoured eye look is any less impressive. In a season filled with beauty influences on either side of the spectrum, from burgundy-lipped goth to luminous “is she even wearing makeup?” faces, this one lands safely in between. It might have something to do with the fact that Rose is in Australia right now, and I’m pretty sure it’s summer there. Still, this is a completely versatile, classic look that can be toned down for work or glammed up for play, whatever the season. Here’s how… Keep reading »

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