I can sum up my feelings on “Twilight” with one brief anecdote: I was coaxed into going to the second (third? I don’t remember) movie with a friend for her birthday and bolted when she went to the bathroom half an hour in. Sneaky! Pretty mean, too, now that I look back on it.
The fact of the matter is that the teenyboppin’ vamp series just doesn’t do it for me. Ashley Greene doesn’t particularly do it for me, either, but I’m starting to warm up to her: of all the movies’ stars, she seems to be the most sartorially inclined, and it helps that, much unlike that harpy K. Stew (I kid, I kid), Ashley always looks comfortable in her clothes and happy to be where she is. I’m really into that — you’re rich, you’re famous, you’re beautiful — just smile, damn it! Keep reading »
The Television Critics Association’s Summer Party is underway as we speak, and the brightest young stars of Showtime, CBS, and the CW are turning out for the occasion. To my delight, this guarantees beauty fodder en masse, and the fresh-faced ladies who regularly grace the small screen have not been known to disappoint. Jaime King has been in the business for some time, but the former high fashion model keeps it low-profile these days — there’s a good chance you won’t recognize her unless you’re a fan of “Hart of Dixie,” in which she plays the antagonist to Rachel Bilson’s main character. Keep reading »
Vanity Fair releases its Best Dressed list annually in the September issue, and each year the results are less surprising than they are, well, wholly expected. It’s the typical Hollywood-meets-high society fodder: nubile French starlets, rap moguls, heiresses, oil magnates, real estate tycoons, athletes, and royalty regularly monopolize the coveted ranks without so much as batting a diamond-studded, private jet-flying eye. Really, nobody who makes the list particularly cares whether or not they make it, because they don’t have to. As for the top spot, well, that goes to Kate Middleton this time around — is there anything more predictable? Keep reading »
There is no shortage of bizarre products and tools claiming mystical weight loss properties that will have you dropping pounds as if the basic rites of diet and exercise never existed. My personal favorite pitch thus far is that of SlimScents, which urges you to, and I quote, “harness the POWER of an EXCITING new research breakthrough” to “sniff yourself thin.” Convincing, no?
Alas, my beloved SlimScents have been upstaged by the latest and greatest in fraudulent weight loss technology: Prends-moi, now available on the British market, is “the world’s first slimming fragrance,” designed to “slim with pleasure” using ingredients that release endorphins already present in the body to trigger a “pleasure message” within the brain. (Also noteworthy: egregious overuse/abuse of the word “pleasure.”) Keep reading »
Relax, you guys: the code red alert for Jessica Biel’s bangs trauma has been lowered to third-degree orange! Just kidding, they still look terrible, but at least she’s is figuring out how to work with her unfortunate fringe, no? As seen at the photocall for her new movie “Total Recall” (a remake of the original 1990 film), this is one of my favorite looks that I’ve seen on Jess: soft-focus skin, very little on the eyes, and a rich pink-red lipstick (which seems to be Chanel Rouge Allure Velvet in La Fascinante) to bring the focus to her full lips and make her hazel eyes look greener. From the ears down I love the cool, beachy waves she’s sporting, but the bangs must go. I repeat: the bangs must go.
In the world of runway and celebrity beauty, the term “bare-faced” doesn’t actually mean a face that’s, well, bare. In fact, its real definition is much to the contrary — it’s a face full of makeup that imitates the look of flawless naked skin, the reality of which very few people can lay claim to. Luckily, perfect skin is a surprisingly simple look to achieve, requiring little more than a few hardworking products and the right tools to apply them. Once you know how to fake a naturally smooth, glowing complexion, it’ll become your canvas — you can accentuate your perfect base with a bright matte lipstick or smoky eye, or make like Stella and pile on the blue mascara for a mod take on vivid color. The opportunities are endless. Get the details, after the jump … Keep reading »
“Oh, this old thing? Psh. It’s Dior.” John Galliano may be an anti-Semitic coot with pigtails and an ill-advised pornstache, but he is also a design hero … or villain, depending on who you ask. Regardless, I will be wearing this crustacean couture look to my next blue-tie event. Get it? Like those blue bands they use to hold the claws together? Hahahaha. Ugh. [World of Wonder]
Rachel Weisz is so beautiful it’s stupid, and I think much of her allure has to do with the fact that she lacks the eerily perfect symmetry of most Hollywood faces — she has a really unique, almost strange look to her that is beyond compelling. After all, Daniel Craig put a ring on it, and though there was a significant amount of scandal surrounding that whole situation, it seems to me like the circumstances were very different from what the general public took from it (which, it must be said, definitely applies to most celebrity “scandals”). But I digress, because all I really have to say is: how gorgeous are these photos from the British actress’s September cover of Marie Claire UK? Those eyes! That hair! If I could have anyone’s face, I would probably choose Rachel Weisz, because look. Since I am ostensibly unable to do that, I’ll settle for trying to make myself look like her by piling on the bronze eyeshadow and contouring the hell out of my cheekbones. After the jump, check out my product picks for recreating Rachel’s smoky, subtle beauty — I know you don’t want to think about this, but it’s truly perfect for fall. Keep reading »
Taking proper care of your skin can be costly, that’s for sure, but there’s no reason you should have to empty your pockets for it. If you’re tempted by the restorative perfecting promises of overnight treatments like La Mer The Regenerating Serum, $260, but find the price not quite as crush-worthy, look no further than Kiehl’s Midnight Recovery Concentrate, $44. Anyone familiar with Kiehl’s products will know that their comparatively lower price tag doesn’t mean they’re any less effective than the big-ticket stuff; in fact, unlike La Mer’s formula, the Midnight Recovery Concentrate is clinically proven to restore radiance, reduce oil production, and improve fine lines as well as uneven texture. This paraben-free, 99.8% naturally-derived treatment also contains healing squalane, soothing lavender oil, and glow-imparting evening primrose — sounds far more credible than La Mer’s fabled Miracle Broth™, which in actuality I suspect is probably just a cocktail of chemicals with fancy packaging and celebrity endorsements.
In my most solitary personal moments, there is nothing I like better than to watch “Jersey Shore” with my pants off and my mouth dumbly ajar, spooning with a bag of Lay’s. That shit fascinates me. My many private observatory hours of guilty pleasure screening have naturally led me to pick favorite cast members, episodes, couples, and fights, which is the hallmark of reality TV, no? Its very core intention is to make you invest time and energy into watching and thinking about these characters, who are actually real people, and that in and of itself is stranger than any fiction.
Anyway, whatever — my fave is the artist formerly known as Jenni Farley. JWoww has a sensitivity and lucidity to her that that the other housemates lack, and I was actually pleasantly surprised by how intelligent she seemed to be at many intervals. I also thought in the first couple of seasons that she was so naturally pretty, but things only got weirder and weirder from there. Why won’t this (no longer) perfectly good-looking girl stop messing with her face? Is it insecurity? Does she actually think she looks … better? Case in point: here she is, being the case study in how not to wear makeup, and what plastic surgery not to get. I’m sorry, but this is straight-up sad.