Profile for Rachel Krause

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I Can’t Quite Put My Finger On What The Aerial View Of This Church Resembles

Aerial view of Christian Science church looks like a penis

Christian Scientists are not known for their sense of humor, but have a look at this bird’s-eye view of the Christian Science Society of Dixon, Illinois, and tell me that God isn’t laughing right about now. Furthermore, the congregation’s slogan is “rising up.” All of the jokes have already been made. I didn’t even have to do a damn thing. [via Gawker]

Britney Spears Is Apparently British For Halloween

Britney Spears does... something for Halloween
Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween from Britney Spears and her Madonna-esque faux-English accent, which she utilizes to recite the opening monologue of “Thriller” while cavorting, uh, creepily alongside green-screen ghouls and graveyards. I don’t completely understand what I’ve just seen, but Bert-Bert looks conscious, which is ALWAYS a good thing. [Jezebel]

Jude Law Gets His (NSFW-ish) Butt Out For “Dom Hemingway”

Jude Law stars in "Dom Hemingway"
Dom Hemingway!

I always manage to forget that Jude Law is actually a terrific actor. “The Talented Mr. Ripley”? “I Heart Huckabees”? “Closer”? So good! Jude’s latest role is as the titular “Dom Hemingway,” a gangster free after 12 years in prison, trawling the streets of London to collect what he’s rightfully owed. Richard E. Grant, Demian Bichir, and “Game of Thrones” beauty (and Frisky favorite) Emilia Clarke also star in what looks to be a violent, vulgar, and shockingly hilarious new film. “Dom Hemingway” premiered in London last night, but it won’t hit American theaters until next April. In the meantime, let’s hope this cheeky (literally) trailer can hold us over. Not safe for work, unless your place of work, like mine, is firmly pro-Jude Law’s naked bum. [via Celebitchy]

This Fake “Lord Of The Rings” Subway Service Advisory Poster Isn’t All That Far From The Truth

"Lord of the Rings" fake subway service advisory

Relying on the New York City subway system is sometimes like relying on a three-legged, one-eyed horse for all of your transportation needs. Trying to get from my apartment off the G train to a friend’s apartment off the L train on a Saturday evening is a trip that should theoretically take 20 minutes, but instead involves a half-mile walk and piling onto a shuttle bus packed with 200 other miserable, sweaty hipsters shouting at the sad-looking old people who happen to be standing by the doors. In particular, ever since Hurricane Sandy hit a year ago, trying to get from one place to another has been like trying to get to fucking Mordor. Keep reading »

Surprise! Footage From Kanye West’s Proposal To Kim Kardashian Has Surfaced

Surprise! Footage From Kanye West's Proposal To Kim Kardashian Has Surfaced
Where's Baby North?

What, did you really think footage of Kanye West‘s histrionic proposal to Kim Kardashian (“PLEEEASE MARRY MEEE!!!”) wouldn’t make it to the Internet in less time than it took for us to fully grasp just how foolish it is for Kanye not to insist upon a prenup? Trick question: nobody will EVER fully grasp the absurdity of that decision. So here it is, y’all, the “leaked” reel, shot by YouTube co-founder Chad Hurley, of the “greatest moments” from the super-intimate occasion. Naturally — naturally — much of it is set to Kanye’s own music. [Dlisted]

Pharrell Williams, 40, Knows The Importance Of Skincare

Pharrell Williams knows the importance of skincare

“You have to clean your face. You can’t sit around and assume it’s going to be OK. I wash my face every day — don’t be afraid to wash yours before you go to bed! … At the end of the day, you just have to take care of your face. I’m being honest with you.”

— This information from Pharrell Williams is absolutely critical, and do you know why? It is critical because that man, yes, the man pictured above, is FORTY YEARS OLD. Most dudes, in my experience, just don’t grasp the importance of washing one’s face, but Pharrell does, and it’s obviously paid off. Cleansing, toning, and moisturizing: it’s not just for the ladiez! [Into The Gloss]

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