Profile for Sexpert Lindsay

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The Nookie Know-It-All: Big Lipped Lass

“I have seriously huge labia and I am way concerned that guys will think my vagina is ugly. Am I being ridiculous?” — Labia Majorly Majora, San Francisco, CA

Yes you are!

Labia majora (the technical name) vary greatly from woman to woman. No two vaginas are alike…which means there are tons of women out there with big labia, small labia, and somewhere in between. Whatever kind you have, rest assured that you are not abnormal. Keep reading »

The Nookie Know-It-All: Orgasm Stats

“What percentage of women have an orgasm during intercourse? The stats I’ve read really seem to vary, with some studies making it seem kind of rare. Is that true?” – Curious About Climaxes, Cleveland, OH

General statistics (which vary as much as your orgasms do) show a whopping 75% of women failing to reach orgasm during intercourse. 12% percent NEVER EVER achieve one, even through self-stimulation.
A lot of this has to do with knowing your body well enough to determine what turns you on and what doesn’t. I didn’t achieve my first orgasm until my mid-20’s, and didn’t find a partner I could have regular orgasms with until I was almost 30 (I’m 29 now, so you do the math).

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The Nookie Know-It-All: Do All Guys Love Oral?

“Do any guys NOT enjoy oral sex? Do they enjoy it more than actual sex? — Seeking Sucking Stats, Duck, NC

A guy that doesn’t like oral sex is like a monkey not liking bananas. If they ever found one, they’d put it in a museum instead of a zoo. Very few people (girls and guys) don’t like oral sex. I mean, who doesn’t want to sit back and relax while someone else does all the work? But that doesn’t mean we want oral sex all of the time. I’d say guys prefer an 80-20 ratio of sex to blow jobs.
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The Nookie Know-It-All: His Pleasure Zoneage!

“What are some hot spots on guys’ bodies?” — Hand Me A Map, Athens, GA

I don’t know if you know this, but an area called “the penis” is a definite hot spot on a guy. Usually licking, stroking, or inserting this area makes the guy go CRAZY.
Aside from that, there are a few other key areas on the male physique… Keep reading »

The Nookie Know-It-All: Chronic Diddler

“If I masturbate too much will I be unable to get off when a guy goes down on me?” — Solo Satisfier, Baltimore, MD

Unlike guys, the more a girl masturbates the more likely she is to have an orgasm during sex (intercourse or oral). Masturbating might actually help you achieve an orgasm FASTER. The more we know our bodies (and what movements turn us on), the more we’re able to translate that experience in the sack.

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The Nookie Know-It-All: Lost Orgasm

I’ve been dating a guy for about a month and a half. Every thing is great — similar outlooks on life, we share a lot of opinions on things etcetera — except for one thing. In that time period, during our above average sex life, I’ve climaxed once. ONCE. His technique is just fine, but for some reason its not happening. Typically oral sex does the trick for me, but even that’s not working. Now I feel like there’s so much pressure on it to happen that it makes it even harder now. Thoughts? Advice? New techniques? — Have You Seen My Orgasm?, Brooklyn, NY Keep reading »

The Nookie Know-It-All: Pregnancy Signs

Uh, I think I might be pregnant. What are the earliest signs of pregnancy? How soon after conception will a home pregnancy test work? — Bun In The Oven?, Burlington, VT

The # 1 sign of pregnancy is a missed period. It might sound super obvious, but unless women are on the pill they can sometimes miscalculate their period and not recognize when they’re late. Other early symptoms include breast tenderness, darker areolas, morning sickness (aka vomiting or nausea), strong aversions to smells and foods, general fatigue, low back pain, constipation, and frequent urination. Keep reading »

The Nookie Know-It-All: Potty Sex

If you’re going to have sex in a public restroom, is it better to use the women’s or the men’s? — Lovin’ In The Loo, San Jose, CA

If you’re at a Minneapolis airport and happen to be a Senator, I highly recommend using neither. But if you aren’t, I think you should ask yourself this simple question: Who’s cleaner? Guys or girls? I think we all know the answer to that one. Guys seem to think a bathroom is a place where you can pee freely on the seat and take a massive dump without even lighting a match. If the thought of that makes you want to drop your britches, than have at it. If not, I suggest you use the women’s.

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The Nookie Know-It-All: Morning After Etiquette

Whenever I sleep over at a new guy’s place, I am never sure what to do/how to act in the morning. Am I supposed to leave? Am I supposed to stay and pretend to be sleeping? Also, how do I hint to a guy who has slept over that it’s time for him to leave? — Awkward In The Mornin’, Dallas, TX

Isn’t it weird how awkward conversation over eggs seems way scarier than letting some dude put his penis in you? It’s because the morning-after usually signifies what direction (if any) this new relationship will take. That’s a lot of pressure before 9 AM! Your safest bet is to take the guys’ cue when you wake up. If Mr. X is already dressed and halfway out the door when you’re just starting to rub the sleep out of your eyes, than you know it’s time to say goodbye. If you wake up to Mr. Y offering you a pair of his boxers and bunny slippers, than make yourself at home and stay awhile.

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The Nookie Know-It-All: Love Bites

I’m having a problem with hickeys, and I was wondering if you could tell me how to get rid of them—fast. — Bruisey, Providence, RI

Are you dating a 12-year-old? Do people STILL give hickeys? I’ll stop sounding like a grandma…but one more thing: If you want to get rid of them so fast, why are you letting someone give them in the first place? As soon as you feel Dracula heading for your neck, get out the garlic and tell him to lay off! If that doesn’t work, try this two-part method the next time you get a neck gift:

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