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This Week In Insanely Pricey Celeb Purchases…

In case you had forgotten that celebrities are not just like you, we have a bunch of recent evidence for you:

  • Madonna’s daughter Lourdes turned 16 recently, and as we all know, 16 is a big deal. So of course her mum bought her … an apartment, the Daily Star reports. It seems the teen has been rebelling lately, and for some reason Madonna figured the solution would be to let her move out. But don’t worry, the apartment is only a few blocks away from Madonna’s in Manhattan, and is of course close to the Kabbalah Centre. Read more…

Jessica Timberlake? Biel Is Taking Justin’s Last Name

Jessica Biel? Try Jessica Timberlake. “Yes, I’m changing my name” after getting married, Biel tells People. “My professional name will still be the same, but for life, yes, I think it sounds great. I think I really won the jackpot of names.” For people who tried to keep their wedding secret, Biel and Timberlake sure can’t shut up about it. The actress also tells People, “It’s hard to find that one person in the world. Once you find that person, go for it. That kind of commitment is very special.” Read more…

New Ann Coulter Brouhaha: Mitt Nice To “Retard” Obama

Ann Coulter must have been feeling ignored, because she’s dropped a bomb that’s managed to anger even her fellow conservatives. Last night after live-tweeting the debate, Coulter posted, “I highly approve of Romney’s decision to be kind and gentle to the retard.” Among her critics: Michelle Malkin, who tweeted, “What a stupid, shallow thing to say, Ann.” Malkin’s Twitter site, Twitchy, rounded up some of the negative backlash and noted, “She sure doesn’t speak for us.” Read more….

Congressman Joe Walsh Says “Life Of The Mother” Never An Issue

Looks like Joe Walsh won’t be getting off Jon Stewart’s list of the craziest guys in Congress any time soon: Last night in a debate with his opponent, Democrat Tammy Duckworth, the Illinois rep and Tea Party favorite explained that he is “pro-life without exception.” He continued, “Understand though, that when we talk about exceptions, we talk about rape, incest, health of a woman, life of a woman. Life of the woman is not an exception.” Duckworth accused Walsh of allowing a woman to die rather than get an abortion, and Walsh said that was unfair. After the debate, he explained further to the press, NPR reports.

  • He told CNN: ”This is an issue that opponents of life throw out there to make us look unreasonable. There’s no such exception as life of the mother, and as far as health of the mother, same thing, with advances in science and technology. Health of the mother has been, has become a tool for abortions any time under any reason.”
  • He told WGN: “With modern technology and science, you can’t find one instance … there is no such exception as life of the mother, and as far as health of the mother, same thing.” Read more…

Five-Second Rule Pretty Much Bogus

If you were laboring under the delusion that the “five-second rule” had any basis in scientific fact, well, keep dreaming. Germs latch onto food a lot faster than that, according to a new San Diego State University study co-funded by the cleanly folks at Clorox. Researchers dropped baby carrots on floors, countertops, sinks and more, and found that germs routinely beat the five-second clock, CBS Atlanta reports. Read more…

Megan Fox & Brian Austin Green Welcome Baby Boy

Megan Fox pregnant photo

Megan Fox managed to keep it a secret for almost three weeks, but she revealed today that she gave birth to a baby boy on Sept. 27, Us reports. Noah Shannon Green “is healthy, happy, and perfect,” Fox wrote on Facebook. He’s the first child for Fox, 26, but husband Brian Austin Green, 39, has another son from a previous relationship. A source told Us in the past that Fox “is amazing with Kassius,” who is 10. Read more…

Scott Brown Pays Homeless To Be His “Supporters”

The Scott Brown campaign has admitted that it has been paying homeless people to demonstrate in Boston’s working-class Roxbury neighborhood with signs declaring themselves “Obama Supporters for Brown.” Benjamin Thomas, the former city elections commissioner running the operation, tells the Boston Herald that these “supporters” are paid a per-diem that “works out to” about $8 an hour, financed through the GOP’s MassVictory program. But he insists that all of them would support Brown even if they weren’t being paid. Thomas, who is black, says the program is designed to appeal to black voters.  Read more…

Beyonce To Perform At The Super Bowl Halftime Show

Beyoncé sang the national anthem at the 2004 Super Bowl, but she has yet to perform at the iconic halftime show—until 2013, according to an AP source who says she’s slated to take the stage this time around. An official announcement is expected tomorrow. This season’s Super Bowl will be held Feb. 3 in New Orleans, the city’s first championship game since Hurricane Katrina. The AP speculates that Beyoncé could collaborate with husband Jay-Z or her Destiny’s Child bandmates. Read more…

Conspiracy Theory: Paul Ryan Cribbed From Nirvana

We’re going to suggest taking this one with a shaker full of salt, but the Internet is buzzing with accusations that Paul Ryan stole the kinda-vaguely touching anecdote he told about his daughter during last night’s debate from, of all people, Kurt Cobain. In response to a question about abortion, Ryan told the story of how he’d nicknamed his daughter Liza “Bean” because when he saw his wife’s first ultrasound “our little baby was in the shape of a bean.” Read more…

Is Taylor Swift Cheating On Conor Kennedy?

Just when you thought Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy were going to skip off into the sunset together come not one but two rumors that Swift has been stepping out on her young man. Star magazine reports that Swift had the nerve to cheat on Kennedy with his cousin, Patrick Schwarzenegger, according to Radar. (Avid Swift-watchers will recall that Patrick was her first rumored love, before reports switched to Conor.) Sources say Taylor and Patrick were making out at a Kennedy family event, and that the family now considers her a “hanger-on” and “despises” her. Read more…

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