Profile for Kiki T

In Bed With … “The Bachelor”‘s Jason Mesnick

Note: I just have to say that I, Kiki T., being of sound body and mind, in no way would ever want to get “In Bed With” this guy, but, like watching a car accident, curiosity makes you do (and write) some messed up things. In case any of you like car crashes too, here’s one for you…

VITAL STATS
Born: July 5, 1976 in Cleveland, OH
Sun Sign: Cancer
Ascendant: Unknown
Moon: Libra
Mercury: Cancer
Venus: Cancer
Mars: Leo

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Ask The Astrosexologist: Should I Ditch My Husband For My Online Lover?

I will start off with the players: Me, Leo 8/11/72, born approx 8:30pm, Eugene Oregon; my husband, a Virgo, 9/5/76, born in Kitchener Ontario, and the lover, a Gemini, 5/23/77, born in Poughkeepsie NY.

My husband and I married very quickly after being friends for a long time — there had always been some chemistry and attraction, but once we were married things really went downhill. It has reached the point that I don’t want to make the effort because I resent him so much, and also the lack of response and attention from him has affected my self-esteem. We ‘took a break’ in August, this was a huge relief for me. For a variety of reasons it is not possible for us to separate completely yet, and we continue to live together. He wants to reconcile, I do not think I will ever be able to be happy in this relationship. To his credit, he is very committed to me and willing to work on the relationship, but I just don’t feel like he’s ever going to get it — get me, and that is a very lonely feeling within a relationship.

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For The Week Of March 9-15, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Embrace your independence, because as of right now, that will be the only thing that will lead you back to sanity. If you spend too much time listening to your honey go on and on about whatever he thinks is right, you will eventually start questioning yourself — and darling, no need for that. You’re right, he’s wrong. Give it time, you’ll get to say, “I told you so.”

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

If it sounds like guilt, feels like guilt, know it as guilt. Don’t feel bad for decisions you have to make for you, because this is your life and you’re entitled to feel as happy as you want to. For anyone that doesn’t see it that way, know they have no place in their life, no matter how deep your history goes with them or how good you want to view them.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Your life is finally heading to new heights of fun, bringing back your optimist — hallelujah! Go ahead, make up fantasies and get lost in. Dream up all fantastical scenarios to go head over heels on. While they might not happen, the inspiration alone is worth ODing on because through it, other great accomplishments will come through and no matter what, will land you on your feet.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Keeping your composure will be your biggest task this week, as someone who thinks himself as an authority figure will spout off information that’s not his to share, putting you in an uncomfortable position. Sure, we all put our foot in our mouths, but if there’s no remorse, that is when you know that person as a jerk and to make necessary steps to avoid further incrimination.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Let loose and have a little more fun than usual. This means putting that nagging disciplined voice of yours on mute and taking on a more devil may care attitude, as it’ll be the times you feel trouble coming on that’ll put you in the most prime place to get that little somethin’-somethin’ that’ll give you your groove back.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

When it comes to sharing, you might be its poster child, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. Face it, being generous can be a thankless job, especially if you are dealing with spoiled patrons that don’t seem to get that your kindness is not a right, but a privilege. Of course, being a martyr without anyone asking isn’t required either; so think twice before opening yourself up too much.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

They’ll be no holding you back when it comes to airing out your opinions. Seems somewhere along this week, you’re going to snap and let all the venom ooze out of you until you get your point of contention in its place. While this might burn a bridge, feel relief that you’ve crossed it enough times to never have to go back anyway.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Any paranoids you have in regard to health issues, deal with them now. Otherwise, your paranoia this week will be heighten to a new level of dysfunction, putting you in a ringy state of mind that won’t only make you a bitch to everyone around you and a self sabotaging maniac to yourself. Yes save yourself by dealing with obvious priorities.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Good news is on the way. Chances are a friend will have something interesting for you, which is a direct win for you or can inadvertently set you onto a path that will lead you to something you’ve been wishing for. Whichever the case, this will mean having to listen closely and even in-between the lines if you must. However, once you hear what you need, it’ll be obvious.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Your Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde will be flip-flopping all over themselves, trying to get in face time with everyone you know, making you one crazy mixed bag of nuts. Of course, chances are you have an odd variety of people around you, making it easy to pick out the freaks that get off on this kind of thing. After all, why waste this level of insanity on just yourself?

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

When it comes to basic communications with others, you’re going to have to take the high route — perhaps so high, that you might have to walk over them to get to a new plateau. To say the least, they’ll be several occasions where someone you thought had a chance will start talking out of their ass and if you don’t take it as a sign, you will only have yourself to blame.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

There will be many things that’ll irritate you beyond belief this week, but this isn’t the time to express anger back. Best to just see these misgivings for what they are and quietly mark them down as points against these wrongdoers. When the time is right and with the proper strategy, you will be able to unload, move ahead of these twits and get back to where you belong — on top.

Ask The Astrosexologist: Can’t Stop Pining For The Sag That Got Away

I am a Leo (born at 7:56 p.m. on Aug. 7, 1984 in Texas) who is still hung up on a Sagittarius guy (Dec. 14, 1977 in Wisconsin) after three years. I was ready to be in a relationship and my life was in a great place. Unfortunately, he wasn’t. A woman had left him for another guy a couple years before and he was still not over it. We hung out a lot as friends and we didn’t ever have sex, though we came close a few times. Then things got intense very quickly (mostly my feelings for him) and he withdrew from me. Also, he made comments a few times that made me see that he was still heart broken after the last girl and he actually seemed to directing his pain into anger at her and women in general. He became a real downer, and I started to get pretty depressed too.

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For The Week Of March 1-7, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

If you hear something that doesn’t sit right with you and you’re feeling like you’re being lead into the wrong direction, pay attention. Your intuition will be on and if you trust it, it’ll save you from a pending disaster. Stop thinking you have to make any more excuses to get by, because there is no more time to waste.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Forget trying to get on the same page as your partner. Emotional unrest is going to be a part of the week, as the past will come back to haunt. Feel free to take that jaunt down memory lane, if you are indeed the one to get that calling, as this is the time to exorcise those demons once and for all. If it is him, just sit back and let things happen as they will, things will fall back into place.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

A monkey wrench is going to be thrown into your routine, causing all sorts of delays and tipping off a few bizarre psychological hang-ups and even uncovering a few you didn’t know. To say the least, it’s a week of startling revelations of discovering you aren’t as brazen as you come across and that your tender side speaks way louder to the one that matters.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Just as you go cruising along, living on the crest of this wave of happiness, down comes reality and washes it all away. Not to say what’s left behind is bad, just tougher to deal with than what you’ve acclimated yourself too. Yes, the honeymoon is over and now it’s time to start dealing with the important stuff — your ego.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

When it comes to changing anything up in your home life, don’t. Making impetuous decisions won’t be in your favor. Best to consider options and make sure when you are acting out of determination, not desperation. If you must do anything, move important tasks onto other territory, as it’s fine to do other things, like taking a vacation or a spa day.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Any last minute info you hear, ignore it. While news may shake you up, most of the time it’ll be a false alarm. Panic is just part of this phase, but with no real outcome. Think of it as the universe testing your preparations for emergencies, as thinking fast on your feet is skill you’re going to have to hone to be able to get you off of them in the near future.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Slowly, sluggishness will creep into your brain, but don’t let it kill your motivation on long-term goals. While there’ll be some second-guessing going on, approach it as reworking, rather than demolishing. As you should know you are an extreme lady, but not everything is always so black and white, so this week, consider those grays.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

With love, you can’t always know immediately if you’ve made the right choice. This week though, payback starts to come around and gives you peace of mind you haven’t had in ages. Lucky are you to see the one you once would of pledged your heart unconditionally to turn out to be such a loser — karmic satisfaction 100% guaranteed.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Life happens in cycles and if you’ve been feeling as if you are on a never-ending treadmill of tedium and angst, things are finally going to switch — however, into reverse, so hold on tight. This means the universe is going to open up Pandora’s Box in some way and throw a little craziness into the mix, which can make you appreciate the finer points of boredom.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Love or another meaningless fling is your perfect escape, as aggravation with friends will be the culprit of your duress. They’ll irritate to the point of wanting to erase all your contact info and start anew. While you’ll have reason to feel this way, it doesn’t mean you’re perfect either. There is always a cause to every effect and to think your best on this matter, it’ll require a little sweat.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

You may want to rethink your sense of entitlement, because what you think you deserve isn’t even the prize that is up for grabs. A dose of humility will do wonders for you over the next several weeks, as you start seeing the path you are heading on isn’t the one you thought it might be — not to say it’s bad, just different.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Despite all the efforts you’ve put into helping another live a happier and more productive life; gratitude will be a rare commodity. While you can’t teach class to everyone, you can sympathize that they’ll never be as perfect as you and then rethink the extent of what you are giving. To be where you truly want to be, it means directing things on a two-way street.

In Bed With … Hugh Jackman

VITAL STATS
Born: October 12, 1968 in Sydney, Australia
Sun Sign: Libra
Ascendant: Unknown
Moon: Gemini
Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Virgo

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Ask The Astrosexologist: Should I Try A Serious Relationship With My Virgo Man?

For four years I’ve been dating a man on and off. We were both very happy and we had great chemistry. He wanted to establish a serious relationship, but due to our hectic schedules, we cooled things off for a while. Now he wants to start dating me again and the chemistry is still there. He says he still has feelings for me, but I’m tired of the on and off again relationship. Do you think that this will become serious? My birth date is 6/20/67 at 12:38 pm and his is 8/24/75. – Uncertain Keep reading »

For The Week Of February 22-28, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Clicking with that special someone will make you feel as if you’re on top of the world. Having gone through many trials and too many tribulations, why be shy to express your feelings? Go ahead; indulge in all the silly things that being in love means, drawing hearts, special ring tones — because if ever there were a time to gush, it’s now.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Your management skills go under the wire again, as your honey once again hits a rocky patch. While you can’t be everywhere at once, being fast on your feet and honing your organizational skills is required. Sure, detouring chaos at a moment’s notice sucks, but perhaps this when you should start paying attention to these repetitious cycles and the cause and effect.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Finally, romance comes back into your life in a big way, reminding you once again why you are the sign of sex. Although it’ll feel like a glass of water after a long walk in the desert, pace yourself; more options are set to come — and although you might have made your pick already, there will be nothing wrong or hotter than letting your decision stew.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Stop putting off that phone call you know you should of made ages ago. This is your last time to redeem yourself to a wronged lover and it’s in your best interest not to let this chance go to waste. You’ll find distance has made the heart grow fonder and in this case, it’ll be in your favor as this is the time to wipe your marred karmic slate clean.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

You’ve always been realistic about your finances, perhaps a little too much so. This week, loosen up the slack and see that opening up those purse strings can now buy you a few adventures and opportunities that are priceless. If you’re attached, this means a mountain retreat weekend f*ck-fest; if single, this means a beach resort weekend f*ckfest.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Not everyone is out to get you and the sooner you realize that being angry isn’t the only way to get attention or feel edgy, the closer you’ll be to a place where unsettling drama isn’t the commodity and good times are. Seriously, the only thing that’s going down on you with these theatrics is your stock.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

A breath of fresh air is coming, as you’ll be seeing your way out of a sticky situation that you thinking you had no power. Seems now, there is nothing to lose when it comes down to being as bad as you want. So whip out the leather, put on your most dramatic f’ck me heels and lay down the law, because no one will be getting off quite the same anymore.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Your compassion will be rearing its little head, making you act in ways that’ll surprise someone close to you. While it might not be turning over a new leaf completely, it’ll at least shake up preconceived notions he had about you. Seems he’ll be able to understand that sweet soft spot of yours a little easier and wanting to touch it just a little bit more too.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

As you know, relationships are never perfect and as much as you’d like to think you’ve behaved properly throughout your affairs, there are always two sides to every story. With a reunion seeming inevitable, do look both ways before crossing that line. However, know that when you do, come out with both arms fighting.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

With your love life seeming a bit dubious these days, best to put your energy somewhere else. So, if you’ve been dabbling with the idea of being your own boss or some sort of big career move, go for it. The stars are aligned for you, lighting a new path, one in which you won’t have to keep looking over your shoulder. Enter this new direction and magic will follow.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Relish in your freedom, because if you don’t see that you control your fate, you might find yourself guilted into actions that are sub par in the happiness and self-satisfaction category. Sure, help if someone deserves it, but to just dole it out thinking you owe it to anyone — hell no! Being a good person doesn’t mean being obedient.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

This week, a situation will appear that’ll put your intelligence, savvy and charisma to the test. How you handle this situation will prove to be a major factor in your future. Don’t feel ashamed to ask questions or move slowly. In fact, the more deliberate your pace, the more exciting the build up and in this case, a little mystery will go a long way.

Ask The Astrosexologist: Should This Leo Wait For Her Virgo Man To Be Ready For Commitment?

“I’m a Leo girl (Capricorn Ascendant, Moon in Aries, Mars in Capricorn, Venus in Libra) and I’m extremely emotional. I’m dating a really great guy (Sun in Virgo, Sagittarius Ascendant, Moon in Aquarius, Mars in Leo, Venus in Libra) who is really into me. We have been together for over a year and have a great relationship. We rarely argue, still have an exciting sex life and I think we balance each other out very well. My emotional personality goes well with his practicality and discipline. However, our relationship started out while he was in the process of getting divorced — he and his ex wife have been divorced for eight months now. We’ve gone through numerous difficulties and have come out of those issues closer and stronger than before. My problem seems to be trusting him and controlling my jealous impulses. I want to put my wandering mind to rest and believe that he is faithful. I have no reason NOT to believe this, as he constantly speaks with me and tells me he loves and misses me, but sometimes I can’t help but think that he is sleeping with his ex or someone he works with.

He talks about the future constantly. However, he is skeptical about moving too fast because he thinks that was his issue with his ex-wife. He says that things will develop naturally over time. However, my impatient nature has me ready to move in with him right away. He frequently says, ‘It’s not the right time for us.’ I know I should be patient, trust him and give him time, especially since he just recently got divorced, but I can’t seem to lock my emotions down and trust that this is the right thing for us right now. Help!” – Leo Lady Keep reading »

For The Week Of February 16-22, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

This is your time to love and be loved. So, whatever issues has your head in a tizzy, let it go. Let bygones be bygones and realize that in the whole scheme of things, there is major love between you and your boo and you both are on the same page with all that truly matters. No, not all will be easy sailing, but for now, enjoy that someone does has your back.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Details matter. So don’t let your logic be glossed over by a pretty picture and ignore the substance that is lurking or lacking underneath. You aren’t and never have to be as desperate to think you can’t have it all. However, if you keep trying to lie to yourself and deny what you truly want, then inevitably, you’ll be fulfilling your own worst self-fulfilling prophecy.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Make a wish now. Chances of something beautiful happening is in your stars, but you’re going to have to know what you want to recognize it. Seems in the past, you’ve made demands and as soon as you get it, you drop it. This time around, the universe is pleading with you to think in the long-term and really be ready to take that next major progressive step.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Although you like fluttering about on the wings of whatever wind is blowing your way, you’re going to have to set your roots down for a little while and source out the scene. Seems your honey is feeling rather neglected and it’s now your time to shower him with some love. If you don’t have one, then take this as your cue to get feng shui on yourself and rethink your home base.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Expressing your feelings in new ways is your best bet to improve your current status. If you’re single, this is your time consider trying speed dating or online options. If you’re hooked up, time to get down to business with your baby to discuss the future and make some solid plans — with deadlines; whichever the situation, think of this week as the first week of the rest of your life.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Be happy with the material things in your life, as they are the mark of your successes. Let them be a reminder to what you’ve accomplished in your life solo. Then, if need be, be ready to compare to the prospects coming to your life this week—will they be the type to add to your kingdom or leeches that’ll only ruin paradise? Be smart; see the obvious for what it is.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

The post-traumatic stress of V-day will be wearing thin and you’ll be able to gather yourself to a more productive state of mind. You now know what to do and how to do it. Although the demons in your head keep trying to hold you back, think of it as the last hoop to jump through until you hit the promise land. Success is just steps away.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Your intuition will hit a whole new level of accuracy, that’ll make you think you should open your own psychic hotline. However, don’t disregard the weird information that comes in, just because it doesn’t add up. Sometimes it takes time to see the entire picture. So, no you aren’t going crazy, but yes, you’re going to have to be a little patient to piece it all together succinctly.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

If you’ve been considering having a gang bang, this is your luckiest time to jump in. Yes, if you want your love life to get a boost of excitement, you’re going to have to get more people involved. However, even something as small as asking friends to set you up on blind dates will do too. It’s realizing you aren’t alone, as sometimes it does take a village or at least, doing one.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

As your star rises, your honey’s might be at a stand still and that will mean passive aggressive spats of jealousy coming over the horizon to make you see a whole new side to him that will be a big turn off. Of course, nobody is perfect, but damn it, don’t you deserve something closer to it? Yes, and for that, be on guard to see how Mr. Once Perfect behaves over the next few weeks.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Stop thinking worst-case scenarios. If you keep going on that path, it’ll only mean self-sabotaging behavior and thinking you don’t deserve any better — and who has time for that? Be willing to put your suspension of disbelief to work and realize the world is a beautiful place that wants to give you everything you want, with no strings attached.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Forget the proper protocol when it comes to anything regarding sex, because when it comes down to it, the kind you’re going to want this week will be the kind that is worth putting all shame aside for. Yes, the passion, naughtiness and chemistry with whoever is on your radar is going to hit a new level of destiny and although it might not be forever, the memory alone is worth it.

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