Profile for Judy McGuire

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Are You In Lust Or Love?

Sometimes I’m thinking that I love you/But I know it’s only lust. —Gang of Four

Think about it—they’re both four-letter words, both start with the letter “L,” and both can cause us to completely lose our freakin’ minds … it’s no wonder we get lust confused with love. But despite their similarities, love and lust are two very different animals. True, lust can evolve into love, and if you love someone, you (hopefully) lust after them, but it’s also very easy to fall deeply in lust with someone whom you’re never going to fall in love with. Here’s a handy guide for discerning the difference … Keep reading »

Porn Star James Deen On What Makes A Woman “Good In Bed”

Whether you’ve known him for 15 years or 15 minutes (naughty!), the first time you sleep with a new partner can be a pretty nerve-wracking experience. Though jitters can add to the thrill, they can also psych you out. I mean, you’re getting naked in front of a new person! One who’s presumably never seen that tragic unicorn tattoo on your left hip or noticed that your left breast is just a teeny bit bigger than the right. And now this guy … he’s going to put his presumably wrapped penis where? Yikes!

Luckily, we ladies don’t have to worry about premature ejaculation or weak wood, but still—who wants to be a lame-o in the sack? To ascertain exactly what makes a woman “good in bed,” I called in an expert: porn star, James Deen. Keep reading »

How To Be A Good Ex

Not to put too grim a spin on it, but it’s a fact that most relationships eventually end, and most of us have been on both sides of the breakup equation. Here’s a brief guide to handling being either end—the dumper or the dumpee. Keep reading »

When To Shut Up And When To Speak Up About Why You’re Breaking Up

When I discovered one long-term, live-in ex had been cheating on me—long after we’d split—I was shocked. I’d had my suspicions, but he’d always been so judgmental about philandering friends and sanctimonious about his own fidelity, I figured I was just the jealous crazy lady he kept accusing me of being. So when he broke up with me, I had no clue as to why and desperately tried to talk him into loving me again. (It was every bit as humiliating as that sentence would lead you to believe.)

I have yet to experience the pain-free breakup, but I wondered if knowing the truth about this situation would’ve helped me heal faster. I mean, I’ve been less than up-front with certain guys I’ve broken up with. So when isn’t honesty the best policy? Keep reading »

Can Your Relationship Survive Disasters Of Biblical Proportion?

I don’t care how in love you are. No matter how much naked-couple time you log, how often you finish each other’s sentences—even if you regularly eat up hours marveling at the beauty that is your unique, special snowflake of love, every relationship has its ups and downs.

Rare is the couple that can’t handle the highs. Sure, you hear about the occasional marriage that breaks up over lottery windfalls (or when the female half wins an Academy Award, ahem), but for the most part, good fortune is a breeze. It’s the rough stuff that puts your love to the test. And what could be harder to handle than the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse?!

Read on … Keep reading »

4 Questions To Ask Your Next Potential Boyfriend

My pal Stella* is going through a terrible breakup with a horrible man. Like most of us, Stella knows how to deal with their split (time, wine, chocolate, more wine, more time), but she was concerned about the bigger picture. Why had she gotten herself mixed up with this jackass in the first place? Or the moron before him? Or the cad prior to that one?

Being a sensible lady, Stella called her old therapist in order to get some perspective and guidance. Surely a licensed professional would have some clue.

Sure enough, she did. After giving my friend a dose of very tough love, Ms. Shrinky Dink gave her a list of questions to ask the next man she considers dating. According to the good doctor, the answers will tell her everything she needs to know before getting in too deep. Keep reading »

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