Profile for Jessica Wakeman

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Disney Tries, Fails To Trademark Dia De Los Muertos

Twisted Disney Truths
The twisted truth behind five of your favorite Disney movies. Read More »
Disney Obsessed Bride
She dressed like Ariel from "The Little Mermaid" on her wedding day. Read More »
Working At Disney World
mickey mouse minnie mouse
What one woman learned while working for Disney. Read More »
  • Disney filed several trademark applications for the phrase “Dia de Los Muertos,” a holiday celebrated in Mexico and other Latin countries to honor the deceased, for a Pixar film. But after an outcry on the Internet, Disney put the kibosh on the project. [Southern California Public Radio]
  • Aurora, Colorado’s “Dark Knight Rises” shooter James Holmes will plead not guilty by reason of insanity. [ABC News]
  • Wade Robson, a choreographer for Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake, has reversed his prior denials and filed a lawsuit accusing the late Michael Jackson of molesting him as a child. Robson testified in Jackson’s 2005 molestation trial that he had shared a bed as a child with the singer, but was never molested. [New York Daily News]
  • Kristen Wiig’s “Saturday Night Live” promos are here! [NYmag.com]
    Keep reading »

Farrah Abraham’s Sex Tape Is More Popular Than Kim Kardashian’s Sex Tape

Watch Farrah's Sex Tape!
We got a seriously NSFW clip! Read More »
Review: Farrah's Porn
Amelia tried and failed to masturbate to Farrah and James' sex tape. Read More »
  • Mazel tov, Farrah Abraham, your sex tape with James Deen has crushed the numbers set by Kim Kardashian and Ray J. But no one is interested in “Keeping Up With The Abrahams,” really. [New York Post]
  • Lauryn Hill has been sentenced to three months in prison for tax evasion. [Hollywood Reporter]
  • The “Ender’s Game” trailer is here, nerds! [YouTube]
  • A drunk Tiger Woods supposedly embarrassed girlfriend Lindsey Vonn by swaying and stumbling at last night’s Met Gala. Well, that will probably be the least of the embarrassment you will get from him, Linds. [US Weekly]
  • Also, BellaSugar has a roundup of all the Met Gala nails! [BellaSugar] Keep reading »

Turkish Airlines Bans Crew From Wearing Red Lipstick, Nail Polish

Miniskirt Ban
Indonesia to thoughtfully ban miniskirts so women don't "invite" rape. Read More »
Uggs Banned By School
Uggs were banned at one middle school, but it's not why you think. Read More »
Another Miniskirt ban
Italian town considers a miniskirt ban to "restore urban decorum." Read More »
red lipstick
  • Turkish Airlines has banned stewardesses from wearing red lipstick and nail polish, claiming bright makeup “impairs visual integrity.” Critics say the restriction is a sign the moderate Islamic country is becoming more conservative, in particular towards women’s sexuality. [Guardian UK]
  • According to the Chairman of the Senate Armed Services Committee, Carl Levin (D-MI), there are over 70 sexual assaults involving military personnel every single day. This comes following the news that 26,000 service members had reported “unwanted sexual contact” in 2012, up from 19,000 the year before. In response, President Obama sharply rebuked those who are “betraying the uniform.”  [Yahoo, Salon]
  • A Fox News host asked, hella inappropriately, if 14-year-old Malia Obama is on birth control. [Madame Noire]
  • A history of smear campaigns against politicians centered around abortions. [Feministing] Keep reading »

Some Feminists Are Upset About The Onion’s Piece On Chris Brown Beating Rihanna To Death

the onion rihanna

Yesterday, we, and many, many others, breathed a sigh of relief when Chris Brown told a radio station that he and Rihanna had once again broken up. (They’re both too young for him to be “wife”-ing her, he said.) Humor site The Onion did their spin on the story today, penning the story “Heartbroken Chris Brown Always Thought Rihanna Was Woman He’d Beat To Death,” in which Brown (obviously, not really Brown) laments he’ll never get to murder her in a domestic violence incident. Here’s a sample:

After revealing yesterday that he had recently split up with longtime girlfriend Rihanna, a heartbroken Chris Brown tearfully told reporters that he always thought the 25-year-old singer was going to be the woman he’d beat to death one day. “Despite all the ups and downs, I was so sure Rihanna was the one I’d take by the throat one day and fatally assault, and even toward the end I continued to hold out hope that we’d be together until the day she died at my hands from blunt-force trauma,” Brown, 24, said in a radio interview this week, telling DJs he still has abusive feelings for his ex-flame and is hopeful that he might punch her again one day.

Simply, I thought the piece was cringe-inducingly hilarious — it’s supposed to make you viscerally uncomfortable about how far domestic violence can go. Not everyone agrees, instead seeing it as mocking violence against women of color. Keep reading »

Color Of Domestic Violence
On Kasandra Perkins and the color of domestic violence. Read More »
I Witnessed DV
domestic violence
Jessica watched a man commit domestic violence on the street. Read More »
Domestic Violence Advice
court room
... from a prosecutor who has seen it all. Read More »

No, Just No: Teens Now “Proposing” For Prom

Anti-Gay Prom
Special ed teacher joins students to create straights-only prom. Read More »
RuPaul At Prom
You won't believe what RuPaul werk-ed to prom. Read More »
Trans Kid's Dress At Prom
Tony Zamazal
Texas school allows trans student to wear a dress at prom. Read More »

The New York Post, which, granted, pulls complete bullshit out of their ass, reports on the apparent trend of ever-more-elaborate “prom proposals.” One kid asked his date over the school PA system, another brought a message of cupcakes to the classroom spelling out “P R O M ?”,  and yet another guy asked his girlfriend to prom on top of a gorgeous bridge in Florence, Italy. Let me repeat: his girlfriend. Like, the person who already had good reason to assume she would be his date to prom. Yankee Stadium also said seven kids so far this year have rented out the centerfield videoboard for $100 each to ask someone to prom; other (insane) kids are renting plane banners.  Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: 12 Things To Know About Dating A Musician

Dating Don'ts: In Bed
Don't ever say these things in bed. Read More »
Anal Sex Songs
anal sex songs
We think these supposedly clean pop songs are actually about anal. Read More »
Dating Don'ts: Money
These bad money habits are bad news. Read More »
dating musicians

A few years ago, I had to swear off dating musicians. I’d been dating them since high school, both casual guitar-noodlers and career musicians who had songs on CW shows and their faces on T-shirts. Again and again I’d fall for the sensitive guitar player who wears eyeliner … and again and again the same patterns would repeat themselves that led to us breaking up. I have nothing but the nicest things to say about most of them as people. Don’t take my swearing-off musicians as a warning, per se. On the contrary, my loss is your gain — the more for you! Just make sure you know these 12 details first. Keep reading »

8 Crappy Ways A Masturbation Session Can Be Interrupted

Songs About Masturbation
18 songs about masturbation in honor of Divinyls singer Chrissy Amphlett. Read More »
Mom's Vibrator
Why Amanda is buying her mom a vibrator as a gift. Read More »

There I was, minding my own (lady-)business, happily masturbating with my Laya Spot, when the cat hopped up on the bed. He rubbed against my leg, purred, made eye contact with me. Held eye contact with me.

That’s it: the moment is killed. I can’t get it off when the cat is in my bed, certainly not while we’re making eye contact.

Unfortunately, domesticated animals are not the only ways Nature conspires against us from enjoying some very special alone time. Ranked from tolerable to worst, here are all the crappy ways to end a masturbation session:

Keep reading »

“Girls Gone Wild” Founder Joe Francis Convicted For Assault

Joe Francis Dumped
Joe Francis' wife dumped him after 2 long months of marriage. Read More »
"GGW" Tell-All
Allegations from the "Girls Gone Wild" tell-all. Read More »
"Girls Gone Wild" Suit
Should women suing "Girls Gone Wild" be allowed to stay anonymous? Read More »
  • Sleaze master “Girls Gone Wild” Joe Francis has been found guilty of assaulting a woman at his home in 2011. Three women accused him of refusing to let them leave his Hollywood home and attacking one of them by “choke-slamming her head into his tile floor.” He’s been convicted on three counts of false imprisonment, one count of assault, and one count of dissuading a witness from reporting. [TMZ]
  • DYING. DYING! “The IT Crowd,” the British comedy which made me obsessed with Richard Ayoade and Chris O’Dowd, will film a finale to the series sometime in the next three weeks, series creator Graham Lineham announced. My heart is this right now —-> !!!!!!!!!!!! [Bleeding Cool]
  • Kreayshawn is pregnant. Mazel tov! [PopDust]
  • Here’s where you can stream the new Vampire Weekend album. [NYMag.com] Keep reading »

Prince Harry Supposedly Telling People Kate Is Pregnant With A Little Prince

Perfect Polka Dots
A maternity look we want to steal! Read More »
Kate's Cute Belly
Aww, she's finally popped! Read More »
It's A Girl (Maybe)
Kate Middleton seemed to indicate she was having a daughter. Read More »
  • Prince Harry is supposedly telling everyone Kate Middleton is carrying a boy. I shudder to think what kind of trouble Uncle Harry and the little prince will get into 18 years from now. [Dlisted]
  • Keira Knightley’s tulle wedding gown — which she wore when she married James Righton of the Klaxons this weekend – is possibly a Rodarte gown she already wore back in 2008. Hey, celebs can shop their closets, too! [Telegraph UK]
  • Vogue editrix Anna Wintour had Kanye West and Kim Kardashian over for dinner at her place last night — no doubt burning sage afterwards to cleanse all the bad energy. [US Weekly]
  • Oprah actually asked newly-out-of-the-closet NBA player Jason Collins if he ever played with Barbies as a kid. Facepalm. [Vanity Fair]
  • “The Office” held a wrap party in Scranton, Pennsylvania, this weekend and it was kind of adorable. [HyperVocal] Keep reading »

Rhode Island Legalizes Same-Sex Marriage!

France Legalizes Gay Marriage
France becomes the 14th country to legalize same-sex marriage. Read More »
NZ Passes Gay Marriage
And parliament breaks into song to celebrate! Read More »
Nancy Reagan Loves Gays
nancy reagan
Hey, GOP: even Nancy Reagan supports marriage equality. Read More »
lesbian brides
  • Rhode Island became the 10th state in the nation to legalize same-sex marriage last week! The state House and Senate both approved marriage equality and the governor signed it into law on Thursday. Congratulations, Rhode Island! [Feminist.org, Salon]
  • Today In Irony: the Air Force’s chief of Sexual Assault Prevention and Response has been arrested for allegedly sexually assaulting a woman. [HyperVocal]
  • The cost of birth control is higher in some low-income neighborhoods than in wealthy ones, according to a small study done in Florida. [Huffington Post]
  • Will this TED talk turn every man who watches it into a feminist? [Upworthy]
  • Meet Holly Jacobs, 29, who stood up to an ex-boyfriend who posted private pictures of her on revenge porn websites. [BetaBeat]
  • Good news, gays! You can change, just like rapists and murderers, according to Christian wackadoodle Pat Roberson. [Think Progress] Keep reading »