Profile for Jessica Wakeman

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Adele’s Infamous Ex-Boyfriend Finally Speaks!

Meet Slinky Sunbeam
Adele's actually fell in love with this clown. Read More »
Still Friends
Adele says she has a friendship with her infamous ex she sang about. Read More »
Adele's New Dude
Adele and Simon Konecki photo
Meet Simon Konecki, Adele's new boyfriend! Read More »
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They could have had it all! But instead of rolling in the deep, Adele’s ex-boyfriend (this goofball) is releasing an album of his own called Dan 21 featuring sure-to-be-chart-topping hits like “Someone Like Me” and “You’re Welcome.” Sigh. It has just occurred to me that I could have monetized my breakup with Ex-Mr. Jessica much, much better. [Mirth Mag]

Lindsay Lohan Bares Her Butt For Terry Richardson

Kim's Butt
Kim Kardashian butt photo
Kris Humphries is supposedly claiming that Kim's booty is fake. Read More »
Lindsay Lohan poses for Terry Richardson photo

Oh, to be a fly on the wall at a photoshoot with Terry Richardson: “Now, bend over the railing and show me your panties … ” Ick, ick, ick. Oh well. She may be a hot mess everywhere else in her life, but at least Lindsay Lohan still remembers her ass is her best asset. [Terry's Diary

Women On Afghan TV Told To Wear “Less Makeup, More Veil”

Killed For Baby Girl
baby girl photo
An Afghan woman was killed for bearing a baby girl. Read More »
Today's Lady News
Today's Lady News
An Afghani rape victim has been ordered to be released. Read More »
Abuse Victims
abused woman photo
NGOs estimate 90 percent of Afghan women are victims of abuse. Read More »
TV presenter photo

Your daily reminder that as screwed up as our government’s attempts to control women’s bodies is sometimes, it could be worse: female TV presenters in Afghanistan have been warned by the government to lay off the makeup and wear veils more frequently. The Information & Cultural Ministry asked TV networks to require women to wear a veil and forgo “dense makeup” in respect to “Islamic and Afghan values.” The ministry was reportedly pressured to make this advisement by a council of Islamic religious scholars. The continued policing and controlling of women’s bodies is just another example of how misogyny is still very much afoot in Afghanistan. [AFP]

Morning Quickies: Chris Brown Tried To Pickup Woman With “I Promise I Won’t Beat You”

Chris And Rihanna
A timeline of Rihanna and Chris Brown's relationship. Read More »
Chris Brown's Abuse
On why our culture must take domestic violence more seriously. Read More »
Jay-Z Hates Him
Jay-Z didn't clap for Chris Brown's performance. Read More »
Chris Brown photo
  • What? No. Just no. A woman in the Grammy gift lounge tells Us Weekly that Chris Brown approached her and asked, “Can I get your number? I promise I won’t beat you.” Then his friends started laughing and one cried “That’s his new line!” The woman says she “wanted to throw up.” Us, too. [Us Weekly]
  • Bobby Brown won’t be attending his ex-wife’s Whitney Houston’s funeral at her family’s request. Also, Aretha Franklin, Whitney’s godmother, is set to perform at the funeral. [Fox News, Starpulse]
  • Who is Carly Rae Jepsen and what does she have to do with the Biebs? [PopCrush]
  • Classic period scenes in TV and film. [Crushable]
  • A woman with a double uterus carried “twins” — one baby in each womb. Oh, the wonders of nature. [The Stir] Keep reading »

Evening Quickies: Meet Malachy, Winner Of The Westminster Dog Show

Dog Shuts Up Baby
This dog tells an annoying baby to shut up. Watch »
Morning Quickies
Amber Riley on "Glee" photo
You have to listen to Amber Riley's cover of "I Will Always Love You." Read More »
  • Meet Malachy, the Ewok — I mean, the Pekingese — who took the Best In Show top prize at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. [The FW]
  • Megadeth’s frontman Dave Mustaine has endorsed for president — wait for it! — Senator Rick Santorum. [Daily Beast]
  • The “Waiting To Exhale” sequel will still happen sans Whitney Houston. [PopCrush]
  • Would you be freaked out if your OB/GYN was selling sex toys? I wouldn’t. I would be, like, yeaaaah buddy! [Betty Confidential]
  • I’ve seen two different women wearing maxi skirts in the frigid February weather here in NYC, so there must be an art to this “wearing maxi skirts in winter” thing. [Wander With Style] Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: Ban Proposed On Abortion After 20 Weeks In Washington, D.C.

Today's Lady News
  • Utah Sen. Mike Like, a Republican supported by the Tea Party, has proposed a ban on abortion after 20 weeks in the District of Columbia. This “fetal pain” bill is based on the anti-abortion argument, unproven by the medical establishment, that five months is the point at which a fetus can feel pain. (You can read more in-depth on “fetal pain” laws here.) Oklahoma, Kansas, Idaho, Nebraska and Alabama have similar fetal pain bills in effect.  [Salt Lake Tribune]
  • I have instructed Amelia to drink some cold medicine and watch this unintentionally HILARIOUS video from the American Life League about the evils of Planned Parenthood, which include “penis balloons,” “vagina cupcakes,” and “vagina macarons.” Actual quote from this video: “Planned Parenthood’s gateway drug is masturbation.” Oh my word, the comedy is priceless! (Priceless and scary.) [The Stranger via Feministing] Keep reading »
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