Profile for Jessica Wakeman

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Jessica Simpson Is Talking About Her Body. Again.

Jessica Simpson really fails at this setting-a-good-example thing. I know “The Price of Beauty,” her VH1 reality show, tries to impart the idea that beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and colors. She’s even referred to the show as being like “missionary work” for her. But Jessica certainly doesn’t further her own “cause” when she makes comments like this:

“I have a white girl booty. I don’t have a big butt. I’d rather have a happy medium and take some off my chest and put it towards my butt so I could balance out a bit.”

Really, Jessica? Way to go on that “accept your body, everyone is beautiful!” thing. I guess you could say she’s honest to a fault about her body image issues. Or you could ralph at the galling inconsistency of the various things that come out of her mouth at various times. [E! Online] Keep reading »

Calling All Bad Poetry Submissions!

Calling all Frisky readers! Tomorrow, August 18, is Bad Poetry Day and we need your worst adolescent scribblings for our most epic, embarrassing post ever.

Don’t worry, we Frisky staffers will humiliate ourselves for your entertainment by sharing our terrible poems in a separate post. But it’s time for you readers to do your part, too. Send your baddest-of-the-bad poetry and the estimated age you penned this masterpiece to {encode=”jessica@thefrisky.com” title=”jessica@thefrisky.com”} by noon (EST) on Wednesday for inclusion in a very special post of poetry by our dear Frisky readers. Your identity will be kept totally anonymous. Simply include your commenter handle or the name/pseudonym that you’d like us to publish. (All submissions that don’t clarify what name to use will by default be credited to “Anonymous.”)

Your privacy may be protected, but your dignity will be hung out to dry with the rest of us. Keep reading »

Democratic Women Will Raise Your Taxes AND They’re Ugly

This is pretty terrible: The Republican Party’s website for a state Senate race in Minnesota published this YouTube video of “hot” GOP women like Sarah Palin set to the song “She’s A Lady” and then “ugly” liberal women like Hillary Clinton set to “Who Let The Dogs Out?” Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: M.A.C. Makeup Cancels Controversial Juarez Line

  • This is crazy: After our post about a Juarez, Mexico-inspired makeup line created by the designers Rodarte for M.A.C. blew up, the company has canceled the Rodarte line entirely. In a statement on their Facebook page, M.A.C. said:
    Out of respect for the people of Mexico, the women and girls of Juarez and their families, as well as our MAC Mexican staff and colleagues, MAC has made the decision not to ship the MAC Rodarte limited edition makeup collection. This decision will have no impact on MAC’s commitment to donate all of its projected global profits from this collection to local and international groups that work to improve the lives of the women and girls of Juarez. We are currently conducting due diligence to ensure we donate to organizations with a proven record of directly supporting the women and girls of Juarez.”

    We would have just been satisfied with changing the offensively named products — nail polishes called Juarez and Factory — and donating some proceeds to charities. We’re happy the company will still do the donation thing. But their decision for the entire M.A.C. collaboration comes as a complete surprise. What do y’all think? [NYMag.com]

Keep reading »

Quotable: Taylor Momsen Picks A Fight With Rihanna

“People think pop is rock, and the lines are getting blurred. Now Rihanna‘s wearing f**king leather jackets and it’s really annoying.”

— Miserable raccoon Taylor Momsen in the September issue of SPIN magazine. Taylor, you are on “Gossip Girl.” Rihanna wears clothing covered with spikes. Who should be lecturing whom here? [MTV.com] Keep reading »

Quotable: Audrina Patridge Has A $5,000 Chanel Surfboard And You Don’t

“The most expensive thing I bought recently was a $5,000 Chanel surfboard. I’m using it as décor in my bedroom until I get really good at surfing. It’s too pretty to risk chipping it.”

Audrina Patridge, on what you too can have if you eat a Carl’s Jr. hamburger in a gold bikini and spend years of your life alongside Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. [Mirror UK]
Keep reading »

Should Jessica Alba’s Untamed “Va-Jay-Jay” Be A “Vagina”?

“Untamed Vaginas.” Now that‘s a cover line — one you’ll never, ever see on the cover of a mainstream magazine. So the September issue of Cosmopolitan went with this big splashy cover line over Jessica Alba’s crotch: “Untamed Va-jay-jays: Guess What Sexy Style Is Back.”

This is too much for blogger Leah Chernikoff at Fashionista. Railing against the use of “va-jay-jay” from “Grey’s Anatomy” to “Oprah,” she now has a “desperate plea” for a “moratorium” on the word. “When I hear people say it out loud I am a little embarrassed,” Chernikoff wrote. “What’s wrong with saying ‘vagina’?” For what it’s worth, Khloe Kardashian, of all people, agrees with her. Keep reading »

Flowchart: Should You Masturbate Right Now?

Click here to see larger image.

It’s “Love Yourself Week,” so of course we are going to channel our inner Oprahs for schmoopy listicles on the 30 things we love about ourselves. But usually when we talk about “loving yourself” here in the Frisky-verse, there’s something else we mean: masturbation.

Whether it’s with a vibrator, a dildo, fingers — or, heck, the contents of your produce drawer! — we are big fans of rubbing one out. As Woody Allen famously said, “Masturbation is sex with someone I love!” In the spirit of loving yourself in this very special way, we’ve constructed a helpful flowchart to help you decide whether you should masturbate right now. (Quickie answer? If you are reading this at the office, the answer is “no.”) Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: China’s “Fake Virgins” Are On The Rise

  • The lengths women will go through to seem “pure”: an increasing number of sexually active young Chinese women are getting a surgical “hymen restoration” so they appear to be virgins on their wedding night. A “hymen restoration” costs about $700 and involves a half hour of surgery. [Washington Post]
  • Miss Universe contestants caused a stir posing topless in body paint in promotions for the pageant. Because, you know, beauty pageants aren’t supposed to be about people’s bodies or anything. [Huffington Post]
  • Health experts say low-income immigrant women are using the abortion pill RU-486 illicitly, because they can purchase the pills for as little as $20 off the street when they cannot afford a doctor’s visit to have them prescribed. According to the February 2010 of the journal Contraception, the median cost for a first-trimester abortion is $430. [ABC News]

Keep reading »

What Is Ella, The Morning-After Pill That The FDA Just Approved?

Woot, woot! On Friday afternoon, the FDA approved ella, a new emergency contraceptive that can be taken five days after unprotected sex, for prescription-only sales. If the condom breaks, you are a victim of sexual assault, or any number of numerous situations where you’re doing the “No babies! No babies!” dance, you now have more morning-after pill options than ever before.

What do you need to know about ella — and Plan B, the existing emergency contraception? All the deets are after the jump. Keep reading »

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