“One time I was at the net — one of the few times I come up to the net — and I hit a volley and my earring hit me in the eye and I couldn’t see. I eventually had to take them off. Now I practice in my jewelry before I play. You know, you’re on the court, you’re grunting, you’re sweating. It’s not your best look. So I just try to accessorize a bit.”
Profile for Jessica Wakeman
Oh, joy: HBO is developing a comedy about a young woman’s quest for an orgasm, based on the memoir Thanks For Coming: One Young Woman’s Quest For An Orgasm, by Mara Altman. To be completely honest with you, I didn’t get very far into Thanks For Coming because I have a queasy stomach reading about the human body. But the book — and presumably the show — tells how Altman (the daughter of sexually liberated parents) lost her virginity at 17 and slept with a bunch of guys, but had still never experienced “the big O.” In her quest for an orgasm, she visited an “orgasm commune” and masturbated for doctors inside an MRI machine. “I’m very excited about the prospect of HBO adapting my book for a comedy series,” Altman, a former staff writer for The Village Voice, told Deadline Hollywood. “It’s not everyday that a dysfunctional vulva gets to move out of marginalization and into the limelight.” [Deadline Hollywood] Keep reading »
Yesterday, while 16-year-old sailor Abby Sunderland and her boat, Wild Eyes, were getting rescued in the Indian Ocean, her father, Laurence Sunderland, told The New York Post he signed a contract for a reality TV show, “Adventures in Sunderland,” about his kids. “The show might be about family, it might be about Abigail’s trip. It’s something that was shopped around,” Sunderland told the Post.
But then Laurence Sunderland announced he had cut ties with Magnetic Entertainment, the California production company behind the show. “There is no show at this time, nor will there be,” Sunderland said, acknowledging the company did some initial filming. “They were assuming Abigail was going to die out there,” he said. “They were relying on her dying, and so we cut the ties.” Keep reading »
It’s the only time you’ll see Victoria Beckham not wearing five-and-a-half-inch heels, so of course it’s a cartoon. Posh Spice lent her voice to her kids’ favorite TV show, “SpongeBob Square Pants” as the mermaid, Queen Amphitrite.
Just as we suspected! Bravo officially confirmed today that Michaele Salahi, one of the White House party crashers, will star on “The Real Housewives of D.C.,” debuting August 5. Michaele, a blond socialite straight out of Central Casting, and her husband, Tareq Salahi, grabbed headlines internationally when they breached security at President Obama‘s first official state dinner. It turns out Bravo cameras were following the couple that night for the “Real Housewives” TV show. (The Salahis insist they were invited to the event). It was an embarrassment for the White House and Obama’s Social Secretary Desiree Rogers later stepped down. But no matter! Crazy people make for entertaining TV and that’s what matters, right? [People] Keep reading »
Margaret Cho, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. There’s your 1994 show “All-American Girl.” Your stand-up comedy concerts like “I’m The One That I Want” and “Notorious C.H.O.” Your shows “The Cho Show,” and most recently, “Drop Dead Diva.” I could go on, but I don’t want to embarrass you with your own awesomeness.
Whether you caught her in the ’90s or in the aughties, Cho is inescapable — and undeniably funny. This summer, she’s releasing her first album of “comedy music,” Cho Dependent, on which she got to perform with the likes of Fiona Apple and Ani DiFranco. Lucky bitch!
Cho was kind enough to take some time out of her busy schedule to talk to us about stand-up comedy, writing songs about homicidal ex boyfriends and camel toe. Keep reading »
Lord have mercy, The Situation has released a “rap” song. Titled “The Situation,” the verdict is clear — he should stick to fist-pumping on the boardwalk.
Alas, this “Jersey Shore” juicehead isn’t the only reality star with musical aspirations. Who could forget Countess LuAnn DeLesseps from “The Real Housewives of NYC,” who recently released her single, “Money Can’t Buy You Class”? (We’d prefer to forget about “Tardy For The Party” entirely.)
After the jump, I generously sacrifice my eardrums to investigate which reality show single sucks the hardest. Keep reading »
- Jarretta Hamilton, a fourth grade teacher in St. Cloud, Florida, was fired for getting pregnant while she was engaged. When Hamilton’s boss at Southland Christian School asked her when she conceived, she answered honestly that she got pregnant three weeks before her wedding and was then fired for “fornication.” Now Southland Christian School is facing a discrimination lawsuit, arguing that pregnant, unmarried women would be fired under such rules while unmarried men who “fornicate” would not get caught. [ABCnews.com]
- South African officials estimate 40,000 sex workers are on hand for the 2010 World Cup. Condoms, people. [TheGrio.com]
Co-host: “Pat, this is from Anne who says, ‘My husband has always been a flirt and loves to talk with other women he finds attractive. He says he would never cheat on me but his actions are starting to get to me. What should I do?’”
Pat Robertson: “Anne, first thing is you need to make yourself as attractive as possible and don’t hassle him about it. And why is he doing this? Well, he’s doing it because he wants affirmation that he is still a man, that he is attractive — and he gets an affirmation of himself. That means he’s got an inferiority complex that’s coming out. And he’s not gonna cheat on you. He’s just playing. But you need to not drive him away or start hassling and hounding on him, but make yourself as beautiful as you can [and] as fun as you can.”