Profile for Jessica Wakeman
2009: The Year Of The Real Girls
If you came of age in the early 2000s, like I did, pop culture was strange—strangely plastic, that is. Britney Spears had the hottest body on earth, but she married a skeezebag and shaved her head. Paris Hilton had a sex tape, then a TV show and then everyone wanted to be her best friend. Hugh Hefner‘s bunny-girlfriends got their own show and then two of them spun off and started shows of their own.
All the way up to 2007, things were looking weird, when “Gossip Girl” debuted and Blake Lively‘s cleavage co-starred in every scene. Yes, indeed, the 2000s were the decade to be conventionally pretty, blonde, silicone, slick, PR-laden, lawyered up, and above all, fake.
Yes, 2009 sucked and we’re all glad that it’s over. But in 2009, pop culture had mercy on our souls. It couldn’t run on fumes anymore. People, one hopes, got bored. And so, against all odds, 2009 became the Year Of The Real Girl. Keep reading »
What We Really Want To Know About Na’vi Sex
If the sex scene in “Avatar” disappointed you, you’re not alone. James Cameron spent a quarter of a billion dollars on special effects, but there wasn’t even a hint of damn Na’vi peen. (Apparently, they screw by sticking their tails together?) Zoe Saldana, the actress who played Neytiri, has a little explanation:
“…Because [Cameron] was shooting for a PG-13 rating, we couldn’t move in certain directions. The motion would look a little too past the PG-13 rating standards. So it was really funny for Sam [Worthington] and me. We had a lot of giggles there.”
Fortunately, Saldana hinted we might get what we’re looking for in an unrated, special-edition DVD.
But let’s not forget there were an awful lot of curse words in “Avatar,” as well as bombings, death and cruelty. This is America today, folks: 13-year-olds can watch a movie with a lot of colonialist carpetbombing and S-bombs, but no Na’vi sex. [New York Magazine] Keep reading »
Poll: How Will You Be Ringing In 2010?
Loading ...Today’s Lady News: Hillary Clinton & Sarah Palin, The World’s Most Admired Women
- I’m not surprised that according to a recent Gallup poll, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in the world (16 percent), but I am surprised that she nudged ahead of Sarah Palin for that position by just a hair (15 percent). Three women in the top five are all African-American—Oprah, Michelle Obama, and Condoleezza Rice. For reasons totally beyond my comprehension, scorned golf wife Elin Nordegren not only pops up in the top 10 but is tied with former poet laureate Maya Angelou. [Gallup]
- A woman born in South Africa is more likely to be raped in her lifetime than to learn how to read. The mistaken belief that sex with a virgin (even if that virgin is a child) will cure HIV/AIDS is partially responsible for the “rape epidemic.” [BBC]
“How To Lose Your Virginity,” The Documentary
Oooh, cool: filmmaker Therese Shechter is making a documentary about all things virginal, aptly called “How To Lose Your Virginity.” Shechter posted a trailer online and it looks like “How To Lose Your Virginity” covers virginity pledges, the purity ring iPhone app, those creepy “purity balls,” and even Miley Cyrus’ alleged abstinence pledge. Please tell us Kevin Jonas’ glorious princess wedding / inaugural cherry-popping will be featured prominently, too? Keep reading »
If You Want Midgets To Teach You Sex Moves From The Kama Sutra …
… then you’re in luck! MyKarmaSutraBuddy.com has got it all covered for you. Pick a male and female partner—choose from a bigger person, a model, or a midget—and then choose a kama sutra position you’d like to see them demonstrate. The Wheelbarrow, perhaps? The Bent Spoon? The rape-y sounding Prison Guard? I think the fake boinking is pretty cheesy, but Amelia is giggling her head off. Just don’t blame us if you try any of these and hurt yourself. [MyKarmaSutraBuddy.com] Keep reading »
Shocker! Employees Say Tyra Is A Tyrant
Now that Tyra Banks has announced this season of “The Tyra Show” will be her last, disgruntled employees are bitching to the gossip rags about their “difficult” supermodel boss. “There had been high turnover of employees for years,” a source told New York Daily News, dishing that the show allegedly had a lot of unhappy employees during the five years on air. “She and the higher-ups on the production staff could be extremely brutal … She really is a diva.” Another source added, “Everything had to be done Tyra’s way.” Somehow we don’t find these shocking allegations too hard to believe. Keep reading »
