Profile for Jessica Wakeman

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Frisky Reader Revealed: Delilahgem

Hands down, the best thing about working at The Frisky is our amazing readers. We so heart all of your witty, thoughtful, and informative comments—heck, we even appreciate the mean ones. Sometimes, we can’t help but wonder about the faces behind the avatars. So we decided to launch a weekly column where we learn all about a Frisky reader. After the jump, meet Delilahgem, one of our most prolific commenters.

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Quickies: Meet Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dog And Enema Man & Matt Damon Going Into Politics?

  • You can’t make this stuff up: Alan Simpson, the former senator of Wyoming (i.e. an old white dude), was on Fox News and called rappers Eminem and Snoop Doggy Dogg by their it-is-hereby-decreed-new-names, Enema Man and Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dog. DYING. [Dlisted]
  • Father Of The Year Michael Lohan plans to divebomb his daughter Lindsay at court tomorrow with a host of “Celebrity Rehab” cameras in tow. [TMZ]
  • You knew this was coming: Bobbi Kristina Brown allegedly has a sex tape. Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown’s daughter is going balls to the wall with bad decisions lately, isn’t she? [Media Takeout]

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Today’s Lady News: Happy Feminist Coming Out Day!

  • In addition to today being International Women’s Day, today is the also first-ever National Feminist Coming Out day! If you’d like, please share with us in the comments why you’re proud to be a woman and/or why you call yourself a feminist. [Feministing, Feminist Coming Out Day]
  • Meet the five most pathetic female film characters of all time. Prepare to lose your s**t, fans of “The Princess Bride.” [Guardian UK]
  • Bisexual and lesbian women are more likely to have tried anal sex than straight women. So now you know. [Slate]

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Lily Allen Used To Be Bulimic

“I used to vomit after meals. It’s not something I’m proud of. But, I tell you what, a lot of people came up to me telling me how great I looked and I’d be on the cover of every magazine. I thought I looked good and it was great to be able to try on clothes and feel a million dollars. But I wasn’t happy, I really wasn’t. I would love to be the skinniest minniest person in the world but I can’t do that without being unhappy — I like food. I’m a pop star, not a model. Don’t make me feel s**t for not being really skinny and having an eating disorder.”

Lily Allen opened up on her forthcoming British docu-reality show, “Lily Allen: Rags To Riches” that she used to have an unhealthy relationship with food. I knew there had to be something more to that song, “Everything’s Just Wonderful,” where she sings, “I wanna be able to eat spaghetti Bolognese / And not feel bad about it for days and days and days.” I’m glad you’re recovering, Lily! [Daily Mail UK] Keep reading »

Nesting: How Do I Decorate A (Very) Small Bedroom?

Good news, critters! While living with my nearly-70-year-old parents in the ‘burbs has been a “Fox News”-laden blast for the past three months, it’s time for me to leave the nest. Yes, your girl Jessica is packing up her Louboutins and moving back to New York City. Yay! Keep reading »

Fox News’ Megyn Kelly Tweets Punched Woman Maybe “Deserves” To Be In A Coma

Megyn Kelly, WTF are you thinking? Regarding a tragic news story in which a NYC man punched and put a woman into a coma over a disputed parking space, the Fox News correspondent posted the tweet above this afternoon.

Maybe she deserved it? Maybe violence against women is OK? Maybe violence against strangers on the street is OK? Maybe putting someone in a friggin’ coma is OK? Let’s all pray to God this was the ill-conceived tweet of a stupid Fox News intern, not grown-ass Megyn Kelly who should know better than to speculate someone “deserves” to be beaten into a coma. Shame on you. [Twitter, Gothamist] Keep reading »

Texas Politicians Want Rape Victims To Hear Description Of Fetus, Get Ultrasound Before Abortion

Texas, you are rivaling South Dakota in anti-abortion suckitude: the state’s House of Representatives approved anti-abortion legislation that many would call downright cruel. A woman who is a victim of rape or incest, or one whose much-desired fetus has dangerous fetal abnormalities, would be required to get an ultrasound and listen to a description of the fetus and then wait 24 hours before an abortion. But don’t worry, ladies. These kind politicians agreed that you can look away or put on headphones during this rigamarole so you don’t have to hear a fetal heartbeat. A doctor who doesn’t perform a sonogram before giving a woman an abortion could lose his or her license.

Disgusting. Keep reading »

Decorate With A Woman’s Severed Head!

Straight from the Kanye West book of severed heads in home decorating, here’s a vintage ad for a “stuffed” woman’s head to mount on your wall. (Click here to see the full ad!) It’s only $2.98, boys! The copy below would be funny if it wasn’t so creepy:

“One of the nicest qualities is that they don’t talk back! Accurately modeled to three-quarters life-size of real gals and molded of skin-textured pliable plastic, these heads are so lifelike they almost breathe. Saucy glittering eyes, full sensuous mouth and liquid satin complexion, combined with radiant hair colors, give astonishing realism to these rare and unique trophies.”

Um, EW. [Huffington Post via DangerousMinds.net] Keep reading »

Girl Talk: Just Because I’m Kinky Doesn’t Mean I’m Easy

woman in handcuffs photo

I’ve been off and on various online dating sites for, oh, four years now. By far, the stupidest part of online dating is the utter futility of most of the things one could say about oneself and how unimportant they can be. For instance, I’m a brunette who loves to read and has a sweet tooth. Same goes for probably three million other single women. Even personality qualities — loyal and generous, demanding and impatient — don’t mean much until you’re in the thick of it with someone. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that most guys probably check out my photos to see if I’m hot, scan my profile to see if I sound crazy, and if I pass both checkpoints, they message me something like, “hey u whatz up babe.” (And then I delete them.) In other words, it probably doesn’t matter to the majority of men if I say I’m a brunette or my hair is highlighted, or any of a number of other things, so long as I’m not obviously a psycho troll.

But there’s one thing personality trait, if you will, that I’ve advertised because I really do think it is important and I do want men to know about it. And perhaps unsurprisingly, it attracts a fair amount of attention from guys: I tell them that I’m kinky. Keep reading »

Quickies: Britney’s Ex-Bodyguard Claims He Has Sexy Pics & What’s LiLo Bitching About Now?

  • Britney Spears’ lawsuit-happy ex-bodyguard, Fernando Flores, claims he has explicit photos of Brit-Brit that he can prove she sent to his phone. He also claims Britney used to expose herself to him until he brought her cans of soda. Dude, I can relate. Amelia totally does the same thing for Diet Coke! [The Superficial]
  • In other sexy pics news: you might be interested in looking at nude photos of Chris Brown, though I am not. [I looked. He is extremely well-hung. -- Editor] [PopEater]
  • Brad Ferro, the juicehead gym teacher who punched Snooki in the face on the first season of “Jersey Shore,” has joined the army. Some of this guy’s father’s quotes about how his pooooor son’s life have been ruined are downright hilarious. [NY Post]
  • Kanye West has allegedly applied to a master’s degree program in fashion at Central St. Martin’s, a prestigious fashion school in London — though his rep denies it. [Styleite, PopEater]

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