Zergnet: Simply Irresistible
Profile for Jessica Wakeman
“It’s only a matter of time until Malia gets her learner’s permit so I’m hoping to see one of those models that gets a top speed of 15 miles an hour and the ejector seat any time boys are in the car. So, hopefully you guys have some of those in the pipeline.”
—President Obama joked in a speech to the auto industry that 13-year-old Malia Obama will be getting her learner’s permit in a few years, so they’d better get cracking on a daddy-approved vehicle. Hey, lots of parents would like this idea, actually. Hmm, has he stumbled upon a way to save the auto industry? [Essence] Keep reading »
As you read this, I’m on a beach with my toes in the sand and a trashy novel on my lap. Jealous? You should be. Anyhoo, Today’s Lady News will be a reader submission edition! Submit your own links to news articles and blog posts about women, girls, trans-identified people, gender roles, feminism or sexism in the comments. Just write a sentence or two summary explaining what the link is about and give everyone a heads up if it has language or imagery that’s NSFW. Be back on Monday! Keep reading »
See, this proves everything is better in France! American ads about STD prevention are, like, “Have unprotected sex and your penis will turn black and fall off.” France is at least kind enough to show us sexy Frenchies in their panties skipping through a field.
- “Jersey Shore” is back tonight! Those of us with little else going on in our lives are immensely excited. Will Sammi and Ronnie stay together? Will The Situation learn any Italian phrases beyond “smush”? Will there be more in-house girlfighting? So much to look forward to! The folks at MTV have gotten us pumped with this handy charticle on “Jersey Shore” by-the-numbers. Pity the poor intern who had to count each and every one of Snooki’s leopard print accessories. [MTV.com]
- Prince Harry is vacationing alone in the Mediterranean island of Majorca and is “reportedly keeping close company with an unnamed, bikini-clad female.” Harrumph. [People]
- Sarah Michelle Gellar will return to “All My Children” for one last episode before it goes off the air in September. [NYmag.com Vulture]
- Air France may have had an unofficial policy to only allow men to work in first-class when ex-IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn flew on the airline because he may have sexually harassed female flight attendants, according to the French newspaper Le Parisien. DSK was accused in May of sexually assaulting a housekeeper at a New York City hotel. Even on the day he was arrested by NYC police, DSK allegedly barked at an Air France stewardess “What a nice ass!” as she prepared the cabin for take-off. Lawyers for his alleged victim are soliciting testimony from Air France employees who experienced “inappropriate behavior” from DSK in the past. Well, that’s just lovely, isn’t it? [New York Post]
- The American Psychological Association voted unanimously today to support legalizing same-sex marriage as “the policy that the country should be moving toward.” [Think Progress]
First Resort, a so-called “crisis pregnancy center” in San Francisco, has until the end of the month to change its advertisements misleading women about abortion-related services — or else. “Crisis pregnancy centers” often look like women’s health clinics and advertise about pregnancy counseling and services; they claim to help women pay for prenatal care and give them free diapers and other baby supplies. However, CPCs are frequently run by religious organizations and don’t have actual medical professionals on staff; instead, they “counsel” women to not have abortions. Thus, the SF city attorney sent First Resort a cease-and-desist letter warning them about its ads that “appear to be designed to confuse or mislead consumers.” The SF Supervisor Malia Cohen also introduced an ordinance on Tuesday that would punish CPCs for using misleading statements in their ads that make it seem like they provide abortion or counseling for abortions. Keep reading »
The Frisky has kept you up-to-date on what Bill O’Reilly and other conservatives think about health insurers being told to cover women’s birth control without co-pays — i.e. will Blue Cross/Blue Shield cover mani/pedis next? Thankfully, Stephen Colbert has also weighed in and it’s a good thing, too. How else would we know that birth control is exactly what killed the dinosaurs? [The Colbert Report] Keep reading »
It’s a competitive market out there: Sum Poosie is not the only energy drink named after your vagine. P*ssy, a “100 percent natural” energy drink out of the UK, is another ode to nature’s sweet nectar of womanhood. Just what does P*ssy taste like? “A blend of fresh white grape juice from Southern Italy, pressed Mexican limes and lightly carbonated water. These are then mixed with Grenadilla and Lychee flavours, infused with six selected botanical herbs,” according to the drink’s NSFW web site. Oh so classy. Oh so fancy.
What I can’t understand, though, is why my ladyflower is such a fountain of inspiration for ultra-caffeinated elixirs, yet the Tucker Maxes of the world couldn’t eat box if their life depended on it. Ever heard the phrase “the lady doth protest too much?” I’m onto your tricks, p*ssy-themed energy drinkers. [P*ssydrinks.com via Jezebel] Keep reading »