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Mom Accused Of Putting Beer In Her Kid’s Sippy Cup

A Phoenix mother has been arrested after authorities say she put beer in her 2-year-old son’s sippy cup.

Phoenix police were called to a pizza restaurant Tuesday night after witnesses say they saw 36-year-old Valerie Marie Topete pour beer from a pitcher into her son’s cup and then the child drank some of it.

Phoenix police say Topete admitted pouring the beer in the cup because the child kept reaching for the beer pitcher. Read more …

14-Year-Old Girl Urged To Get Breast Implants By Her Mother

Bras, braces, makeup are all rites of passage for many teen girls. But if you’re a member of the Marshall family, so are boob jobs.

Britney Marshall, a 14-year-old from Nottinghamshire, England, is the youngest girl of the Marshall family and the only one without breast implants. Her mother, Chantal Marshall, told the Sun, “Britney is going through a funny phase at the moment and saying she doesn’t want to get her boobs done.”

And Marshall really wishes she would, telling the Sun:

“At the moment she doesn’t really have what I would say are boobs — but I’d like her to follow in her sisters’ footsteps… I really love the fake look of my girls and I know Britney will go that way when she’s a bit older.” Read more…

Man Accused Of Performing Sexual Act With A Teddy Bear For Fourth Time

Once, twice, three times a lady. But four times with a teddy bear?

Charles Marshall of Cincinnati is accused of having sex with a teddy bear for the fourth time in the past two years, according to the Smoking Gun.

Marshall was arrested Wednesday after employees at a health clinic saw him masturbating with a teddy bear in an alley, according to a police report obtained by the Smoking Gun.

Marshall has three previous convictions for either public indecency or disorderly conduct with a teddy bear. This latest time he was hit with a disorderly conduct charge. Read more …

Shoplifter Shoves Prawns Up Skirt At Costco

While there’s no shortage of creative ways criminals try to steal loot from stores, shoving prawns up your skirt apparently isn’t the best strategy.

But Krystal Douglas, 26, and her accomplice, 68-year-old Charles Simboyan, clearly thought otherwise before they were caught shoplifting from a Costco on Monday, State Island Live reports.

According to the report, security guards approached the woman in the parking lot after noticing her awkward walk.

But what first tipped them off was the $5,000 worth of missing polo shirts, which they traced to the duo thanks to security footage, according to Staten Island Live.

Their arrest brought an end to a two week shoplifting spree at the Staten Island store, police told the New York Post. Read more …

Zombie Apocalypse: Singer Maynard Keenan Weighs In On Wine Pairings For Human Flesh

Everybody’s talking about the “Zombie Apocalypse,” and even those in fine dining are having a laugh with it.

Take Maynard James Keenan for example. To the public eye, he’s the frontman for the rock bands Tool and A Perfect Circle. In his off time, he’s a winery owner — and today he answers the age-old undead question: What wine goes best with human flesh?

He recently offered wine recommendations to would-be zombies who want to wash their down their brains with something besides blood, at the behest of the Miami News Times. Read more …

PAM, Sex Led To This Woman’s Arrest

She was lubed up, then locked up.

A Florida woman was fine with bringing olive oil, and even PAM cooking spray, into the bedroom. But when her boyfriend brought up his former fling named Pam, she wasn’t having it.

When Barbara Hall, 60, asked her 45-year-old boyfriend to go to the kitchen for some “sexual lubricant,” he obliged, according to police reports obtained by TC Palm.

Then things got slippery.

“Barbara asked if he had also brought the PAM cooking spray,” the report states. “Barbara believed [the victim] misunderstood what she had said, and commented on a girl named Pam. … [He] admitted to having sex with Pam recently on her boat.” Read more …

World Burping Championships: Tim Janus Wins With 18.1 Second Burp

By most accounts, burping is considered a sign of bad etiquette, but to a small group of people, it’s an actual athletic endeavor.

They are the stout-hearted and full-tummied members of the World Burping Federation, an organization that aims, according to its website, to promote “belching best practices” while “also seeking to remove the stigma that has become associated with belching in recent centuries.”

To that end, five founding members recently met in New York to participate in what was billed as the first annual World Burping Championship, with burper Tim Janus coming out on top with an 18.1-second burp. Read more …

Man Cuts Off Own Penis With X-Acto Knife (Police Believe Bath Salts Not Involved)

If you watched, or hosted, a late night TV show at any point since the mid-1990s you probably remember the story of Lorena Bobbit. Bobbit captured the national imagination when she used a kitchen knife to cut off her husband’s penis while he slept. That one incident alone paid for at least three of Jay Leno’s very expensive cars.

What happened in the typically sleepy San Francisco suburb of Fremont this week was a little different. Fremont police report they responded to a 911 call early Thursday morning to find a 20-year old man who had cut off his own penis with an X-Acto knife.

“Whether it’s paper, wood, cloth or any other material, X-Acto knives let you cut through almost anything with precision and ease,” X-Acto’s website reads. Read more …

Woman Accused Of Choking Her Boyfriend Because He Wouldn’t Marry Her

Some marriage-phobic guys get cold feet. This one got a wrung neck.

Nikoleta Karoly of East Naples, Fla., is accused of choking her boyfriend because he refused to marry her for the purpose of getting a new Visa, according to an arrest report filed earlier this month and sent to The Huffington Post.

As first reported in the Naples Daily News, Karoly’s boyfriend told police that she had been getting increasingly violent with him, after he kept refusing to tie the knot.

The boyfriend said Karoly choked, scratched and slapped him so hard on his ear that he thought he was going deaf, the report states. Read more …

5 Bizarre Acts Of Cannibalism In One Week

When a single act of cannibalism is reported, it is as unfathomable as it is unsettling. To have five such incidents dominate the news cycle — as was the case this week — seems almost unprecedented.

All but one of the following cases are alleged crimes. They range from an international manhunt for a suspect accused of chopping up and eating his male partner to a chef who severed and served his own testicles.

HuffPost Crime offers a round-up of the murder suspects and alleged flesh-eaters who captivated our readers this week with tales of horror. Read more …

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