Yesterday, Will Ferrell’s company, Gary Sanchez Productions, announced that it is launching a female-focused film and television department called Gloria Sanchez Productions. The idea came from Jessica Elbaum, an exec at Gary Sanchez, who will head the division.
This is exciting news, but I think they missed a major point. I believe people are at their funniest, smartest, most moral and most complete when they exist together. Gary Sanchez Productions is like an apartment with no living room. Yes, it’s vital and sanity-saving to have your own room, but all the best stuff happens in the living room, where people congregate and everyone feels like they belong. While I love the new Girls Room of Gary Sanchez Productions, it doesn’t improve what has been going on in the Boys Room at all. Keep reading »
Who CARES if you don’t have a Valentine?! Even literature’s most famous couples failed to celebrate their love without someone being lied to, cheated on, murdered, or worse, emotionally manipulated. The sad truth is, many of our favorite literary characters would be on the giving or receiving end of some pretty bananas valentines. Here are a few examples.
Dear Variety Columnist Brian Lowry,
You wrote a negative review of Sarah Silverman’s new comedy special, “We Are Miracles,” which aired on HBO Saturday night.
And I get it.
The special felt stale, pointlessly antagonistic, and lacked actual jokes. But worse than the program itself was the bizarrely-gendered language you used to smash it.
The title of your piece, which I can only assume was approved by a Victorian-era ghost, was “Sarah Silverman’s Bad Career Choice: Being as Dirty as the Guys.” In the review, you claim Silverman appeared, “determined to prove she can be as dirty and distasteful as the boys.” Keep reading »
“Midwestern nice” doesn’t mean what you probably think it means. Ehem, it actually refers to Midwesterns in the sack! And even if it doesn’t, kindness is very important in a mate, no? Plus, it’s no coincidence that most of the manliest cities in America are Midwestern places. Here’s why you should really date someone from the Midwest. Keep reading »
I hate throwing stuff away, makeup especially, because it’s already superfluous in terms of basic human existence. So throwing it in the actual garbage makes me feel like a reaaaal “who do you think you are?” type of lady.
But alas, my bedroom is overflowing with shit. Shit I can’t use. Shit I don’t need. Shit I wouldn’t wish upon you. Shit forever.
Good God, let’s get rid of it. Here’s what I’ve got on the chopping block: Keep reading »
We all go through dry spells. We all know what it’s like. So let’s give ourselves permission to laugh about those moments when you realize it has been entirely too long since you last had sex. Here are 15 signs. Keep reading »
“The Hunger Games” have officially begun in theaters! GAH! Let’s celebrate with some pickup lines from Panem… Keep reading »