Cracked

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health

I have insomnia — the “I haven’t been able to sleep regularly in 25 years” kind. It’s extremely hard to talk about, because most people attach the term to any random night that they had trouble sleeping. “Sorry, I’m kind of loopy today. I had insomnia last night.” Mara Wilson can back me up when I say… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Everyone knows that having a newborn baby is a hellish, sleep-deprived ordeal that is quickly forgotten when your baby grows into a “TV newborn” who smiles and laughs and melts your heart every time he does something, also known in the real world as a 3-month-old. Many kind people attempt to offer words of consolation to the… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Think of your favorite on screen couple. Now, think of your favorite on scene couple’s sex scene.  Sexy right? Think again. The creation of a sex scene must be the unsexiest way to get it on. Learn why on Cracked…READ MORE »


Love & Sex

There is no job so interesting that you cannot tell a boring story about it. Here are some things that will help you bore the hell out of people when you talk about work. Read all six on Cracked…READ MORE »


Love & Sex

The Internet loves hating on “the friend zone,” because the Internet sees friendship as the highest form of torture. I’m not here to explain that “being in the friend zone” says less about the person who “put” you there than it does about the skewed way you view relationships (although, yes, someone should teach you… READ MORE »


News

It’s a new year, and that means after a month of effort, you’re ready to quit your New Year’s resolutions. Since you’re reading this in English, I assume you resolved to lose weight, or possibly to learn good the spelling for make much big dollars in email schemes of confidence. Either way, I can help… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Orgasms. I invented them when I was 12. I was alone in the shower, my bar of Irish Spring was looking really good, I was warm, damp, and feeling adventurous. It was magical and only slightly shameful, the way I insist on all my orgasms being to this very day. Later I found out other… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

It can be hard being a lady in comedy, and that’s not a recent phenomenon. Ovaries have long been known to sap our joke-making powers. In 1695, a famous playwright came up with what might well be the first “women aren’t funny” line, only he said it in an old-timey way:
“I must confess,… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

I was diagnosed with clinical depression about two years ago. Sadly, this didn’t lead to me beginning a wacky romance with a free-spirited girl who taught me to embrace life and love myself for who I am. I just started taking prescription drugs, made a few lifestyle changes, and felt smugly justified about listening to… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Meeting new people sucks. Well, at least it does for people like us — people who would rather eat a bar of soap than endure the awkward juggling of social rules and misreading of body language that comes with human contact. Confident, practiced people will tell you it’s as easy as walking up to a… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Everyone seems to have a pretty good idea of what marriage is like right up until the honeymoon anesthesia wears off and they can start to feel life’s groin shots again. Sometimes that takes a few years — sometimes it happens right out of the gates. But it eventually does happen, and how you handle… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

January seems to be the worst time of year for realizing how screwed up your life is. Everyone is talking about resolutions. You’re recovering from all the money you spent on the holidays. Taxes are coming up. It’s the month your parole gets repeatedly denied. It’s the month that says, “Here’s a shitload of enormous… READ MORE »



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