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Love & Sex

Humans love sex, and humans love toys. Sex toys are a thing. We tend to think they’re alright, too.

But here’s the thing about sex toys: All the really cool (and really frightening) gear tends to cost you a big ol’ pile of cash. Have you ever wondered what an inquiring mind could achieve… READ MORE »


News

Euphemisms are words and phrases we use when we want to avoid saying something naughty or unpleasant to think about. For example, “choking the chicken,” which on the surface sounds like a beautiful, natural act, is actually a description of something that is pretty disgusting. But even though we use a euphemism so we don’t have… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Doctors — especially surgeons — are expected to maintain a sense of decorum and professionalism at all times. I’m a board-certified neurosurgeon at a major American academic center, and while medicine is an incredibly rewarding career, it puts you in contact with a lot of people doing dumb, terrible things to their bodies. So, on… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

One of the few criticisms of Game of Thrones is that it relies too much on gratuitous sex scenes. But some fans look at the franchise and decide that there isn’t nearly enough inappropriate boning. These special people write fan fiction that will make it impossible to ever read the books or watch the show again without feeling dirty in… READ MORE »


Style

Sure, you can buy all sorts of crazy crap online, but when it comes to walking into a store and making a purchase, America just doesn’t hold a candle to what other countries are packing. Find out what crazy products we here in the U.S. are missing out on Cracked…READ MORE »


News

Until recently, you probably thought that the “men’s rights movement” was just a weird fad on the Internet for sad, depressed guys who wanted to vent about their sexual frustrations, no more or less important to your day-to-day life than, say, people raging against bad movie reviews or complaining that their favorite video game company… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Genitals are perhaps the only thing in the world that everyone loves and most people don’t mind sharing with others. That’s why they also tend to be fairly well-maintained, be it by rigorous daily training using the … um, workout material we find on the Internet, or by flat out gluing our junk full of Swarovski crystals.
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Celebs

In 2006, “The Biggest Loser” was in its third season. This hit reality show focused on a group of 14 people sent off to live in a complex together, with the goal of losing weight via the fastest possible methods that weren’t amputation or amphetamines. However, behind the hasty weight loss, trumped-up drama, and dramatic music,… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

When that one kid back in high school told us that he’d heard that you could get pregnant from blow jobs or that the chlorine in hot tubs means you can’t catch STDs, we were smart enough to call bullshit. But it turns out that we probably shouldn’t have been so quick to laugh and tell him what a… READ MORE »


Celebs

A lot of people have been watching the melodramatic political series “House of Cards” on Netflix (which I believe is a remake of the highly acclaimed “How a Bill Becomes a Law” episode of “Schoolhouse Rock”), and many of these viewers are complaining about how silly it is. They’re not wrong, but they’re failing to see… READ MORE »


Celebs

Some lies are obvious. If a homeless person approaches you and says that he can predict your future in exchange for a dollar, you’ll probably realize that he’s not telling the truth (personally, this only took me $4). If your parents raised you to believe that punching a pack of wolves to death is the… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

We all have pet peeves. We all have rage triggers. For some people, it’s loud chewing. For others, it’s people who point when they talk. But sometimes, even though our hearts race and our fists clench, we know we’re wrong. Or if not wrong, we know we’re overreacting. And it just doesn’t matter. We can’t help… READ MORE »


News

My name is Hannah Ettinger, and I was raised in the Quiverfull movement. The term is taken from a verse in Proverbs, which says: “Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of arrows.” We interpreted this to mean: “Blessed is the man who dies with the most kids.”

In the Quiverfull movement, children… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Sales of urban fantasy, erotica, and romance books are growing faster than the engorged manhood of a vampire whose lack of blood circulation has mysteriously not left him impotent. Maybe this is because society has become more accepting of sexuality overall. Or maybe it’s just because ebooks have finally fulfilled humanity’s long-held dream of being able to… READ MORE »


Entertainment

I live in the perpetually repressed Midwest (feel free to use that as your goth-rockabilly band name) where jobs are as scarce as its citizens’ political debates that don’t use the N-word. The area is basically town, corn, town, corn, corn, corn, town, corn … so unless you’re made of fertilizer, there’s not much available… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

The stereotype goes that when it comes to sex, men are as simple-minded as dogs. (“Come on, we all know guys are only after one thing!”) Well, as someone with a few years’ experience as a dominatrix and phone sex operator, I’m here to tell you that could not possibly be more wrong. Male desire… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

As a father of three children, it takes quite a bit of teeth-gritting for me to admit that parents can be the most eye-roll-inducing shitbags on the planet. We don’t mean to be. The problem is that we’ve lived life before kids and we’ve lived life with them, whereas our counterparts have only experienced the… READ MORE »


Love & Sex

Disclaimer: I’m no prude. Anyone who knows me will spit out a thousand creative insults about me before landing on “prude,” and even then they’re just probably misspelling something more interesting. Yet sometimes when I sit in front of the fire in my smoking jacket, idly sipping Scotch and browsing through the latest issue of Sexy… READ MORE »



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