Profile for Contessa Schexnayder

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Girl Talk: I Got My Ex Back By Bettering Myself

“Oh god, mom, he broke up with me!” I blubbered over the phone, I was crying so hard my face resembled a marshmallow.

I had decided to stay in bed for two days and was starting to become very ripe and slightly unhinged. Needless to say I was not taking this well at all.

“Should I call him? How do you just leave someone? I really needed him and he dumped me!” I said between sniffles.

My relationship with my now ex had taken a turn for the worse over the past five months. I was stressed out at my job, and had decided without much consideration to go back to school full-time. My mood had changed adversely, and I had proven to be very difficult to be around. I became needy and mean, all at once. It had come to the point where I barely even recognized myself. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Date Outside My Race, So What?

My boyfriend has a messy red beard and blond hair. He cooks me vegetarian meals just to make me happy. He takes his glasses off when he dances, and he can usually be found cutting a rug to dance hall or reggae. He was the Hamburglar for Halloween last year. When we’re out, he holds my hand. He walks me home from work. Every Sunday, he invites me to supper with his family.

After meeting my boyfriend for the first time, my co-worker muttered in a voice that I’m sure was meant for an internal monologue, “I didn’t expect him to look like that.” Keep reading »

7 Rules For Dating An Older Man

Yes, there will always be something slightly appealing about young, wide-eyed struggling artists and beer pong-loving frat boys with hearts of gold. But sometimes you want someone a little more settled and refined—someone who prefers a suit to a backwards hat and The New York Times to Maxim. Whether you have already snagged yourself a silver fox, or you are on the hunt for one, there are a couple of things you’ll need to take into consideration. Like all relationships, this could be long or short-term, but it is always nice to know how to act or behave when dealing with the majestic creature known as the older man. After the jump, seven rules. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Sabotaged A Great Relationship To Have A Drink With An Ex

The evening started out harmless enough. My self-sabotage was not premeditated—more like a white lie that got carried away. I was on my way to class to take a test I hadn’t studied for, and I realized I just couldn’t do it. On a whim, I decided to ditch. I needed a drink, stat. I was supposed to meet up with my new guy, Kennedy, after class but he was working late and wouldn’t be ready until later. I went through my mental contact book of friends I had in the area and remembered that my ex-boyfriend Justin worked down the street. As soon as I sent him a text message, he responded. I wrote Kennedy to let him know I was skipping the test and meeting a friend for a drink.
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Girl Talk: I Won’t Be Another Notch On His Bedpost

It’s 12:30 a.m. on a Saturday night, and Matt—who you may remember as the guy who slept with 150 woman, but wouldn’t sleep with me—asks me back to his house to watch a movie. Although we’re not officially together, he’s become my non-boyfriend—we see each other at least twice a week. Dinner was lovely and after a few glasses of wine, I’m drunk and giddy. We don’t see eye-to-eye on many things. I’ll never understand his preference for 20-year-old waif models who could care less about his blasé attitude towards their hearts and emotions, and he doesn’t get my love of cute hipster nice guys who allow me to be careless with their feelings. But we always agree on this: we enjoy each other’s company. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: My First Attempt At Casual Sex

I always change after I’ve slept with someone. It’s a subtle metamorphosis, but one I can count on—after sex, I feel emotionally attached. Even if the sex was boring, or painful, or just plain eh, afterward I always start to picture myself in a relationship with the person—sitting on the couch watching a movie, walking the dog we’ll no doubt adopt, sometimes even walking down the aisle. As such, casual sex is just something I’ve never considered. How exactly does one detach their feelings for one night of sexual fervor?

Thus, you could imagine my surprise when Jack offered to be my “pal with privileges.” Keep reading »

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