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12 Life Lessons From Maury Povich

12 Life Lessons From Maury Povich

During summers spent with my parents, my mother and I would snuggle up with a cup of joe and watch Maury re-runs. Maury, Jerry Springer and other shows like it or “trash tv” are completely fascinating. This is America, not all of it, maybe not even most of it, but they are people in America who exist and lead this strange, bizarre and sometimes tragic lives. They volunteer their dignity for a little bit of fame. I wonder if they think Maury will actually help them? You can get paternity tests at pharmacies these days, so there’s no need to go on national television to find out who the father of your kid is. The show exposes a part of the American underbelly where teenagers have sex for food, men gladly walk away from their children, women are regularly called “whores” and teenagers are “out of control.”

It’s trash tv but it has to be amoral because the people on it volunteer to be on and the people who watch it volunteer to watch it. It wouldn’t exist without an audience. I think the word for it in German is  schadenfreude, the act of taking pleasure in other people’s misfortune. I have no idea why the guests are willing participants, I don’t believe they get paid to be on the show, just flown out to its location. I do know is that I enjoy watching the show, it’s insane, bizarre and I can turn my brain off. Why do you watch trash TV? Read more on College Candy…

The 10 Best Masturbation Scenes In Pop Culture History

The Best Masturbation Scenes In Pop Culture

May was national fapping month, I sort of dropped the ball on this post but hey, does one ever stop fapping? I certainly don’t contain my fappetry to a single month of the year. Masturbation is healthy and funny. People make funny faces when they are aroused, so if you aren’t participating with them, that shit is hilarious. On the flip side, sometimes it’s sort of disturbing and uncomfortable. The 10 following scenes are all of the above. Read more on College Candy…

The Reality Of Being A College Grad, As Told Through GIFs

What It's Really Like For A College Grad

We all know how much being a college grad sucks, right? We’ve reached that level of reality, I hope. It’s been a couple months, and here we are, unemployed and bored out of our damn minds. No more keg parties, no more 2 AM pizza, no more lectures (So I guess there’s one good thing). Sometimes, I miss college so much that I yearn to write a paper or read over a syllabus. The reality of being a college grad is a heavy one to accept, but somehow, we handle it.

If you’re still not content with the reality of being out of college, I’ve decided to finally get it through your head using some amazing GIFs! Enjoy! Read more on College Candy…

10 Life Lessons I Learned From Reading Young Adult Novels

As is true for most aspiring writers, I was first a reader. I think I learned to read at like 4 and completely devoured The Babysitter’s Club series, and then the Hardy Boys, there were some kids in a boxcar that were really entertaining. And then Harry Potter happened and I literally wrote myself a Hogwarts acceptance letter and left it in my parents room. Needless to say, I was a weird child. In any event, through my preteen years, young adult novels were my jam. I learned like all of my important life lessons via teen novels. I mean, really, Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret taught me everything I needed to know about dating and love and relationships and the importance of getting boobs.

Here are the top 10 life lessons we’ve gathered from the best young adult novels. If you haven’t read any of these yet, you should. With your big grown up college brain, you’d get through them in like a week. Read more on College Candy…

10 Moments No Woman Wants To Relive

We’ve all had those good, bad and ugly moments in our lives. We all love the good ones, and take the time to reminisce with our best friends. But then there are those bad and ugly incidents. The ones you don’t want to talk about or even think about ever again. The ones where you wish you could erase from your memory because just thinking about it makes your cringe.

Here are 10 moments no girl wants to relive. Read more on College Candy…

Farrah Abraham’s Oral Skills Were A Fail, So Let’s Talk About How To Really Get It Done

So I watched “Teen Mom” Farrah Abraham’s sex tape/porno/whatever with James Deen (yes, I’m part of the problem) and I, like others, couldn’t help but notice Farrah was having difficulty getting James completely erect via oral. That is … embarrassing, to say the least. It’s one thing to be blowing the flaccid mass of a guy who’s wasted or high or whatever because that’s out of your control. But when you can’t get a dude whose job it is to get hard on command excited … it’s a bit of a problem.

If you watched Farrah’s performance and didn’t even bat an eyelash upon seeing that James was only semi-hard, this post is for you. While there are guys out there who genuinely don’t care for oral, I think it’s a pretty safe assumption that most do. Luckily, giving enjoyable head to a guy is a fairly easy-ish endeavor. (Though, ladies with sensitive gag reflexes/jaw tension, I totally feel your pain). Every guy is different, but if you’re new to doing it or want a refresher, here are some general guidelines to experiment with (no scrunchies required). Read more on College Candy…

5 Things I Learned From Last Night’s “Mad Men” Episode

With the merging companies, there is trouble, tension and transition everywhere. Merging clients and jobs, dealing with logistics of job security and office space — the office is in turmoil, and so is everyone’s life around it. And this is all before the assassination of Bobby Kennedy. Unlike the MLK Jr. assassination, ”Mad Men” chose to put this assassination at the tail end of an episode that centered on the chaos of the character’s lives, rather than the chaos associated with this tragedy.

When did Ted become such a bad ass? Loved, loved, loved Ted this episode. It took him a little bit to find his groove—but you’d be hard pressed to find someone who wouldn’t act this way at first when becoming business partners with Don Draper. I mean, DON DRAPER. Ted feels insignificant, I think he feels a little bit like a phoney—as a fraud. He can’t drink like Don. He doesn’t have the same confidence. But once he is reminded that, yes, he owns half this building. He’s a goddamn pilot and he is the only chivalrous man that works at this ad agency, he gets his swagger back. Don put it best: “No matter what I say, you’re the guy who flew us up here in his own plane.” Period. Read more on College Candy…

10 Things Guys Shouldn’t Do On The First Date

They don’t say, “First impressions are the best impressions,” for nothing. It’s very true! How a person behaves with us the first time we meet them definitely sets the tone for our future interactions, especially if it’s a first date.

I feel like I am always being bombarded with magazine articles about what women shouldn’t do on the first date, so today, I decided to turn the tables around. I have compiled a list of 10 things guys shouldn’t even think about doing on their first dates.

Checking Your Cellphone. This is our first date. Your attention should be on me. Not on your phone. Actually, this is a pet peeve of mine in general. Even when I am just with my friends at dinner, it annoys me to the millionth power when we make all this effort to have dinner plans and all my friends spend doing during dinner is checking their phones!  Read more on College Candy…

13 Things Guys Do But Are Embarrassed To Admit

13 Things Guys Do But Are Embarrassed To Admit

It’s no secret we all omit some of the grittier and less pleasant details of ourselves. Nobody wants to let it be known on a first date about their flossing rituals or what exactly their browser history looked like last night (before he erased it, of course).

These are tiny experiences and habits that make us all the same, that actually are universal and connect us, as the late-and-great George Carlin spent a career pointing out. So…why so embarrassed? Why must we hide the clauses in the fine print when asking someone else to sign the terms and conditions form? Well, lets run down a few of them and maybe we’ll answer that together. Read more on College Candy…

The 10 Best Lord Tyrion Quotes To Celebrate His New Book

George R. R. Martin has announced a new book about Lord Tyrion called, The Wit And Wisdom Of Lord Tyrion. According to BookSeller.com, “The hardback title will gather together ‘clever and naughty quips’ from the popular character from A Song of Ice and Fire series, played in the HBO series by actor Peter Dinklage.” I don’t know if we need an entire compilation of Lord Tyrion’s quotes when we all have Google and are absolutely obsessed with the show but, hey, why not? In case you were wondering what kind of “wit and wisdom” you might find in the new book, we’ve rounded up the 10 best Lord Tyrion quotes to get you in the mood for some “half-man sass.” Read more on College Candy…

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