Profile for Clarisse Thorn

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True Story: I Can Be A Kinky Feminist & A Messy Human Being

Misunderstanding Kink
Some folks don't understand kink is not sexual abuse. Read More »
Dominant Sex
I just want to be dominated in bed! Read More »
First Time: Spanking Party
spanking photo
This is what happens at a spanking party. Read More »
Fat Mike On BDSM
Fat Mike of NOFX
NOFX's Fat Mike talks about his BDSM lifestyle and persecution for kink. Read More »

A few years ago ….

Today, in 2012, I avoid him as much as I can. But my friend (?) Richard used to joke (?) that I only called him when I broke up with my boyfriends. Kinda true, kinda false. Regardless — a few years ago — I don’t even call him this time, I just end up at his apartment for some small party.

He scents the pain in me, and suddenly we’re in a back room, alone. One of the reasons he’s so good at this is that he smells vulnerability like a shark smells blood. I don’t remember whether I ask him to hurt me, or he just grabs me. “Something’s close to the surface,” I tell him, while he leaves bite-shaped bruises on my upper arm. He knows me; he doesn’t leave bruises in places I can’t cover with a t-shirt.

“What is it?” he asks, and I choke on it. I’m already starting to cry. We’ve only been doing this for a moment.

“Red,” I say. The safeword. I’m sobbing. “Red.” Richard stops immediately. “Tears,” I say. “Tears were close to the surface.” Keep reading »

Girl Talk: My Date With A Porn Star

Poor Sex Etiquette
10 things that are rude to do in the sack. Read More »
Likin' It Rough
A woman tries rough sex for the first time. Read More »
What Men Want In Bed
Do these things and he'll be a happy man. Read More »

So, a male porn star walks into a bar. I’m going to call him PS for short, to keep things simple. I’ve seen PS around Chicago before; a couple years back, we ended up at the same karaoke event until 6 a.m. But we hadn’t talked much until I ran into him at the aforementioned bar, attending a fundraiser for sex workers’ rights. See, I write about sex with a focus on S&M and I do activism around it as well, so I end up coordinating with sex worker activists a lot. Plus, sex workers totally know how to put the ‘fun’ in ‘fundraiser.’

As we sipped on drinks, PS and I chatted about sex education, work/life distinctions, and that sex toy demonstration at Northwestern that landed a professor in the center of a controversy. Keep reading »

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