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Nick Offerman Reciting Reddit “Shower Thoughts” Will Help You Get Your Philosophy On

Nick Offerman
Do You Feel Wiser Yet?

Nick Offerman, who brings us the beloved Ron Swanson on “Parks And Recreation,” teamed up with Mashable to read some of the most brilliant tidbits from the subreddit r/ShowerThoughts and raise money for charity: water. Watch and expand your mind. The shower is, after all, the place where we come up with our most (useless) profound thoughts. [Mashable]

Pageant Mom Feeds Her Daughter Tapeworms To Slim Her Down For Beauty Pageant

Well, That's Disgusting

Today in terrifying parenting: on an upcoming episode of “Untold Stories of the ER,” we hear the tale of a Florida pageant mom who fed her teenage daughter tapeworm eggs to help her lose weight for an upcoming competition. When the girl arrived at the hospital with a bloated stomach and severe pain, the nurses first thought she might be pregnant. An ultrasound didn’t show a baby, but it did show a bizarre growth in her intestines, and a trip to the bathroom revealed a toilet bowl full of wriggly tapeworms. Nurse Maricar Cabral-Osorio told UPI, “some of the worms were very long and wiggling around trying to get out of the toilet bowl.” Gag! The girl’s mother turned white as a sheet. According to Cabral-Osorio, ”The mom was apologizing to the girl. It’s like ‘I’m so sorry. You know, I did it just to make you a little skinnier. You needed some help before we went on to the pageant.” The mom bought a pill of tapeworm eggs in Mexico and forced her to ingest it. The show’s over-the-top reenactment of the scene is actually pretty funny, but I can only hope that in real life the mother faced some kind of legal punishment for endangering her daughter. This is all kinds of screwed up and her parenting doesn’t sound safe for any kid. Excuse me while I vom. [Gawker, UPI] [Image via Shutterstock]

Somebody Take Me To A Kitten-Themed Wedding

Kittens
My Invitation Must Have Gotten Lost In The Mail

Happily Wedding, a wedding planning company in California, has opened up a whole new market — cat weddings. In case kitten-themed seating arrangements, feline cake toppers, the “glitter box,” and stationery marked “Furrever” wasn’t enough to make the perfect wedding day for cat-loving couple Kiera and Zach, they were then treated to the surprise arrival of kittens brought in specially to witness their wedding. I hope the cats had fun and didn’t feel too much like props, but if the video is any indication, it looks like their adventure that day was just as epic as the newlyweds’. To support the homeless kitties, Happily asked that anyone looking to adopt contact the Second Hand Souls Animal Rescue and Animal Actors. For cat loving ladies like myself, this ceremony may sound too good to be true, but a day like this can be yours for a cool $25,000. (What, you didn’t just have that laying around for your someday fantasy wedding?) Congrats to the happy couple! [The Gloss]

New Study Says Yoga Sharpens Your Mind

Yoga

Yoga already has lots of known benefits, like better posture, flexibility and physical health, but now we can add something new to the list: increased brain function. According to new research through the University of Illinois, practicing hatha yoga three times a week helps you think more clearly, especially compared to stretching or toning exercises. The study examined a group of 100 people aged 55-79, and found that the 61 of them who practiced hatha yoga at least three times a week for eight weeks showed major improvement in ability to recall information, mental flexibility, and task-switching. The members of the group who did stretching and toning exercises for eight weeks instead of yoga showed no significant change in their cognitive abilities. The researchers controlled for other factors like gender, age or other demographic circumstances, so it’s pretty clear that yoga is the direct cause of the improvements. Keep reading »

Nick Cannon Confirms He & Mariah Carey Are Separated

  • Nick Cannon confirmed that he and Mariah Carey have been separated for the past few months, but denied that cheating is to blame. Cannon says his main focus right now is the couple’s three-year-old twins. They’ve been married since 2008. [Huffington Post]
  • The rapper Talib Kweli got into an on-air argument with CNN anchor Don Lemon over the network’s biased coverage of the protests in Ferguson, Missouri. [BuzzFeed]
  • Lauryn Hill dedicated a version of her song “Black Rage” to those fighting for equality in Ferguson. [Feministing]
  • Hayden Panettiere confirmed her pregnancy via a video of her taking the ALC Ice Bucket Challenge — she challenged her unborn baby to go next. [US Weekly] Keep reading »

Watch This Adorable Jumping Bulldog Puppy

French Bulldog
It's All About The Trust!

Rocky the French bulldog puppy loves to jump, and he’s damn cute at it. Watch him perform the doggie equivalent of a trust fall with his owner. I dare you not to smile when he makes the leap! [BuzzFeed]

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