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Carnival Cruise Ship Full Of Raw Sewage Returns With “Vacationers” Full Of Rage

The Carnival cruise ship that’s been powerless and stranded in the Gulf of Mexico, AKA the SS Vacation From Hell, has finally made its way back to land. Last night, at around 10:15 p.m., passengers began to disembark the Carnival Triumph in Mobile, Alabama; the last “vacationer” exiting the ship at 1:00 a.m. Some people were seen kissing the ground after they arrived in the U.S. Others, understandably, are still reeling from the ordeal.

And, um, kind of can’t blame them. Sleeping in a tent and raw sewage running down the walls — not exactly a rejuvenating getaway. Read more…

Burned Body In Cabin Believed To Be Fugitive Christopher Dorner

Christopher Dorner, the fugitive accused of killing four people on a rampage across California, is believed dead in a cabin in Big Bear Lake, California. The former officer of the LAPD was angry about his dismissal from the force following a situation in which he accused a fellow officer of police brutality.

After a shootout with police, a charred body was found inside a cabin in which Dorner had been holed up. They have reason to believe the body is that of Dorner. This ends a more than week long hunt for the fugitive believed to have shot Monica Quan, 28, the daughter of the lawyer who defended him against accusations of lying and her 27-year-old fiance, Keith Lawrence. He then killed two more officers of the law during his run. Read more…

I Seriously Regret Taking My Husband’s Last Name

When I let it slip to people that I sometimes regret taking my husband’s last name after we were married, a panicked look crosses their face. They’re expecting, I can only guess, a diatribe about a good-for-nothing bum of a husband. I’ll give you the good news now. We’re 12 years in and going strong.

It’s not the marriage I regret. It’s the name.

I never expected to be here. Twelve years ago, I was excited to dump my 10-letter mouthful of amaiden name for one that was half as long. I was ready to say goodbye to years of having to correct the spelling and the pronunciation of the very German name passed down through my father’s family for generations. Read more…

Couple Who “Can’t Live Without” Coffee Enemas Needs To Wake Up

Hey, I’m the first person to admit my complete and total addiction to coffee. A day without coffee is like … a day without prolonged periods of wakefulness, in my case. Meaning: I depend on the stuff to function. Or at least I thought I did, until I heard Mike and Trina’s story. Because this St. Petersburg, Florida couple really does depend on coffee to function, to a shocking degree. No joke.

I know what you’re thinking: How much coffee can these people possibly drink? But that’s just it — neither Mike nor Trina actually drinks coffee at all. They believe that drinking coffee is “bad for their health.” So they give themselves (brace yourself) coffee enemas. At least 100 coffee enemas per month. Each. Read more…

Sandy Hook Movie Plan Causes Outrage

Too soon? That’s the question comedians ask themselves when they make a joke about a tragedy. The same could be asked of filmmakers who decide to take on sensitive topics like 9/11, the Holocaust, or the Titanic. One director has discovered that coming out with plans for a Sandy Hook-themed movieisn’t such a great idea right now. Or maybe ever.

The French-born film director Jonathan Bucari, who has directed nothing anyone has ever heard of, announced plans on fundraising site Indiegogo to direct a film about a young boy with a mental illness who was severely affected by the Sandy Hook shootings. He said he planned to shoot the film in Ridgefield, Connecticut, a town near Newtown.

Almost immediately, the backlash began on Twitter, with people calling the director “opportunist slime” and telling him to “stay away” from the people of Connecticut. Bucari had told a local TV station that he planned to shoot in Ridgefield because it looked like Newtown. But Ridgefield local leaders said they wouldn’t allow it. Read more…

6 Different Kinds Of People You’ll Meet At A Super Bowl Party

Got a Super Bowl party to go to today? Cheering for the ra-ra home team, are ya? Chances are, whatever football get-together you’ll attend, you’ll encounter those who are really into the game, those who are really into the food, those who are really into talking about the food, but not eating it, and three other types of individuals you can’t help but mingle with come Super Bowl Sunday. Read more…

Miss America Contestant Says She’ll Get A Double Mastectomy Even If She Wins

For all the talk about Miss America being a “scholarship program,” we all know that at its essence, it’s still more a beauty contest than anything else. And even though the definition of beauty has evolved in so many ways over the years, some notions of it have not changed. Which is why current Miss District of Columbia (and former Miss Maryland) Allyn Rose has received hate mail over her plans for a double mastectomy. It turns out some die-hard pageant fans feel that a woman without breasts can’t meet the requirements of the title.

Allyn is planning to get a double mastectomy after her year of service as Miss DC or Miss America is over. Her mom, grandmother, and aunt all died of the disease and she feels as though this is her best chance of beating it. The preventative mastectomy has long been a controversial choice for women. Some people bristle at the idea of removing your breast before there is a confirmed problem. But for Allyn, it’s the safest option for a healthy future. “For me, breast cancer is not a matter of if. It’s almost a matter of when,” she told “Today.” Read more…

10 New Ways To Be That Obnoxious Facebook Friend

Let me ask you something. When was the last time you took a bubble bath? How many minutes did you work out at the gym today? What exactly went into making your breakfast smoothie this morning? Do you find it weird that I’m asking? Well, I find it weird that you tell me. Every single day. On Facebook.

Look, I’m not really your friend. That term is used very loosely on Facebook. Odds are we met in elementary school and I only really talked to you once or twice during recess. That said, I don’t need a play-by-play of your oh-so-fascinating life.

That obnoxious Facebook friend. We’ve all got them — we hate them, but we don’t defriend them. They’re like a car crash: you just can’t look away. Read more…

Anne Hathaway Says She’s Too “Vanilla” To Have Sex Appeal

Guess who probably won’t be starring in the Fifty Shades of Grey movie? In a recent interview Anne Hathaway described herself as “very vanilla.” She doesn’t think she has a whole lottasex appeal – at least when it comes to her onscreen presence.

I was seen as this bizarre-world good-girl cartoon that I in no way identified with — very vanilla, very sweet, very accessible, and not interesting. I had no grit, no sex appeal.

Aww, Anne. No sex appeal? No way! Let’s talk about this. Read more…

10 Sex Don’ts That Should NEVER Happen In The Bedroom

No matter how you put it — knock boots, smush, do the deed, get dirty — everyone has certain things they love during sex. Maybe you’re into girl on top. Maybe you’re a missionary kind of lady. Heck, maybe you get off when your guy wears a monkey suit. To each her own.

However, there are some things that are just absolute no-nos between the sheets. Yeah you may not like a dirty talker, but that doesn’t mean it’s an absolute don’t. They do exist, though. Check out 10 of our biggest sex don’ts here…

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