I can still remember some of the quieter moments of my pregnancy: laying on the couch, my fingers trailing over my ever-expanding belly, wondering about the baby inside and if everything would be okay. During our first ultrasound appointment around 20 weeks, the tech had been concerned about the size of the baby’s kidneys and some fluid that surrounded them. He pointed it out to me on the screen, and later on the printed pictures we were given to take home. To me, the blurry image looked no more like a baby than a Rorschach inkblot test, but I so desperately tried to see what the tech saw. In the weeks that followed my anxiety shot through the roof. Was this a random anomaly? Was it something I did? Was it something I could have prevented? Keep reading »
Growing up, I thought the perfect host was a combination of Betty Crocker and Donna Reed: perfect clothes, perfect hair, perfect food, and perfect personality all coming together to ensure her guests are well taken care of.
However, Steve Martin, a Republican State Senator from Virginia, has a different take on the what it means to be a good host. He recently received a Valentine’s Day Card from the Virginia Pro-Choice Coalition asking the state Senator to protect women’s reproductive health options — everything from raising healthy children to having access to safe, legal abortion. Martin took it upon himself to reply publicly via his Facebook page. His response originally included the following:
“…I don’t expect to be in the room or will I do anything to prevent you from obtaining a contraceptive. However, once a child does exist in your womb, I’m not going to assume a right to kill it just because the child’s host (some refer to them as mothers) doesn’t want it to remain alive.” Keep reading »
Within our group of friends, my husband and I were the first to get pregnant and have a kid. More than seven years later, I can now look back and see how much my friendships, particularly with my child-free friends, changed. I may not have realized it at the time, but in retrospect we experienced a few growing pains, so to speak.
When there’s any big life change — whether it’s marriage, a big move, or switch in jobs — friendships can be impacted. But there’s something about having kids that adds a little extra something to the equation. Sometimes it can be good, other times not so much. But what I’ve found to be true — both for myself and from talking to friends — is that most friendships post-baby tend to follow the same sort of pattern: Keep reading »
When it comes to disciplining your children, there’s no end to the opinions you’ll receive. Be strict! Be gentle! Give them free reign! Allow them to fail! Time outs! No time outs! Punishment! Allow them to experience natural consequences! It’s enough to make any parent’s head spin. But what happens when somebody goes beyond offering discipline advice and goes straight to disciplining your child themselves?
Over on xoJane, Sydney Scott took on the unpopular opinion, “I Think It’s OK To Discipline A Stranger’s Child,” writing:
Being reprimanded by strangers isn’t anything new to me. … The rule was that as long as an adult wasn’t creepy or trying to kidnap you, they were an authority figure, and their word was law. So, it’s kind of weird for me to encounter parents who don’t want anyone else ever disciplining their child.
I get where Scott is coming from. She brings up the “It Takes a Village” mindset as part of her argument, and you’re not going to find a bigger proponent of that mindset than me. Having an only child, my husband and I intentionally made the decision to build up a solid community made up of other families with children of all ages, as well as child-free adults But there is a big difference between intentional villages that support each other in a variety of ways and strangers coming up to my child and disciplining him out of the blue. Keep reading »
If there was one thing Piers Morgan got right in his interview with writer Janet Mock last night, it was when he called her, “brave, frank, and honest” about coming out as transgender. Sadly, the interview sort of falls apart after that.
From almost the start of the interview, the header “Was a boy until age 18” ran across the screen, insinuating that Mock wasn’t truly a girl or woman until she had genital reconstruction surgery. That is not only incredibly reductive regarding gender, but missed the entire point of Mock’s new memoir, Redefining Realness: My Path To Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More about her road to girlhood, which began far earlier than one moment in Thailand at age 18.
Instead of treating the topic of disclosure with the nuance and sensitivity that it deserves, Morgan went straight for the sensational, wanting to know how the various men Mock has dated have reacted when she finally told them about being trans. He treated Mock, her body, and her past as a spectacle, rather than with respect as befitting the lived experiences of a fellow human being. (You can read the transcript here, although Morgan’s responses on Twitter are a better illustration of his blowhard behavior.) Keep reading »