Profile for Anonymous

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#OnlineDatingFail: The Broke, Newly-Married, Cheating Narcissist

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 44, Male
Receiver: 32, Female
Site: Plenty of Fish
Tip: Don’t do anything that this doucher does. NOTHING. Not only does this self-proclaimed “player” list his profession as “lying and cheating on my wife,” but he tells us he’s not ambitious, calls himself a “narcissistic ass,” and goes on to explain that he lies to women to sleep with them before running home to his wife of only five weeks. If you ask us, it sounds like this guy is the perfect candidate for herpes … and maybe a marketing class.  Keep reading »

My Reaction To ABC’s New Drama “Black Box,” As A Person With A Bipolar Loved One

black-box
I Have Bi-Polar Disorder
I Have Bi-Polar Disease
A personal essay from a woman who is bipolar. Read More »

Leading up to last week’s pilot episode of “Black Box” on ABC, I’d seen a bunch of previews for the drama centered around Dr. Catherine Black, a talented neuroscientist harboring a secret diagnosis of her own. The series premiere aired right after “Grey’s Anatomy,” which I had been watching, so I decided to give it a whirl.

Big mistake. Keep reading »

#OnlineDatingFail: It’s Called Punctuation

Online Dating Don'ts
Guys need to stop doing these things online. Read More »
Outsmarting Online Dating
Meet Amy Webb, The Woman Who Outsmarted Online Dating
Watch a TED talk from a woman who hacked online dating. Read More »
Online Dating No-Nos
Take these five phrases off your profile immediately! Read More »
Online Dating Lies
Here's some of the whoppers people use in their profile. Read More »
#OnlineDatingFail: It's Called Punctuation

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 26, Male
Receiver: 28, Female
Site: OKCupid
Tip: While this guy refreshingly refrained from mentioning panties, masturbation and the suggestion to pee on each other in his initial message, he’s forgetting a little thing called punctuation. What gets me is that there’s one solo period just hanging out in the middle of his 54 various thoughts. Why even use a period at all? Run-on sentences are not a turn-on, so next time you message someone, you should probably watch this. Keep reading »

#OnlineDatingFail: Let’s Have An Introductory Pee-On-Each-Other Meeting

#OnlineDatingFail: Let's Have An Introductory Pee-On-Each-Other Meeting

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 32, Male
Receiver: 28, Female
Site: OKCupid
Tip: I don’t care how kinky we say we are. Talking about “pee on me, fruit fuckin’” sex the first time you message someone is a surefire way to stay out of their pants. And think of something more original than “multiple partner havin’”… that’s just pure laziness. Keep reading »

#OnlineDatingFail: Sometimes Honesty Is Not The Best Policy

#OnlineDatingFail: Sometimes Honesty Is Not The Best Policy

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 29, Male
Receiver: 26, Female
Site: OKCupid
Tip: When the second message someone sends you (after you haven’t responded to the first message) is about how badly they want their tongue between your legs, you should reply by telling them how badly you want absolutely nothing between theirs, because assholes should not be allowed to procreate.

Did someone send you a creeptastic or WTF message on a dating site? Take a screenshot of the message/your interaction and send it to us at onlinedatingfail@thefrisky.com. Include the info in the post above. (Don’t worry … if we choose to use it, it’ll be anonymous and we’ll make sure to guard all identifying information!)

#OnlineDatingFail: Let’s Get Acquainted, Have A Threesome … You Know, The Usual

#OnlineDatingFail: Let's Get Acquainted, Have A Threesome, You Know, The Usual

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 30, Male
Receiver: 28, Female
Site: Tinder
Tip: If this hadn’t happened in the first 24 seconds after “meeting,” it might actually be kind of funny. Inappropriate, but funny. Unfortunately, this is frowned upon.

Did someone send you a creeptastic or WTF message on a dating site? Take a screenshot of the message/your interaction and send it to us at onlinedatingfail@thefrisky.com. Include the info in the post above. (Don’t worry … if we choose to use it, it’ll be anonymous and we’ll make sure to guard all identifying information!)

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