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#OnlineDatingFail: The Broke, Newly-Married, Cheating Narcissist

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 44, Male…

Anonymous / May 7, 2014

My Reaction To ABC’s New Drama “Black Box,” As A Person With A Bipolar Loved One

Leading up to last week’s pilot episode of “Black Box” on ABC, I’d seen a bunch of previews for the drama centered around Dr. Catherine Black, a talented neuroscientist harboring a secret diagnosis of her own. The series premiere aired right after “Grey’s Anatomy,” which I had been watching, so I decided to give it

Anonymous / April 28, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: It’s Called Punctuation

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 26, Male…

Anonymous / April 26, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: Let’s Have An Introductory Pee-On-Each-Other Meeting

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.

Sender: 32, Male…

Anonymous / April 3, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: Sometimes Honesty Is Not The Best Policy

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.
Sender: 29, Male
Receiver: 26, Female
Site: OKCupid
Tip: Whe…

Anonymous / March 9, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: Let’s Get Acquainted, Have A Threesome … You Know, The Usual

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.
Sender: 30, Male
Receiver: 28, Female
Site: Tinder
Tip: If…

Anonymous / March 8, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: Assholes Love Company

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots.
Sender: 32, Male
Receiver: 26, Female
Site: OKCupid
Tip: Like…

Anonymous / March 6, 2014

#OnlineDatingFail: Your First Message Shouldn’t Be About Panties

The online dating scene is rough. Sure, it’s a great way to meet people, but we use the term “people” loosely, as some of the individuals we’ve come in contact with still seem to be in their primitive forms. Obviously, first impressions count … but not to these idiots. 

Sender: 34, Male…

Anonymous / February 20, 2014

A Picture Story: My Leftover Lingerie

I have this weird thing about lingerie. As soon as I decide to wear something sexy for a guy I’m seeing, I find myself both mentally unwilling and physically unable to re-wear that schoolgirl uniform, teddy, or what have you, for anyone else. For starters, I feel like it’s a form of sloppy seconds, a…

Anonymous / February 14, 2014

On Woody Allen, My Father & Darkness

(Trigger Warning: Discussion of incest and childhood sexual abuse.)

The greatest gift my father gave me was a passion for art. As a pianist and composer with a Master’s degree in Musicology, he infused our home with creativity throughout my childhood. He encouraged me to find my own outlet; instead of sports team…

Anonymous / February 3, 2014

We Test It: The OhMiBod Lovelife Adventure Triple Stimulation Vibrator Is Perfect For Foreplay

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, my pals at GoodVibrations delivered something ten times better than a bouquet of flowers or box of chocolates: the OhMiBod Lovelife Adventure Triple Stimulation Vibrator. YES to sex toys.

I must admit, at first glance, I was slightly intimidated by the vibe’s unusual, sword-like appearance, which feature…

Anonymous / January 22, 2014

Life After Dating: The Death Of Discussing My Sex Life

So you’ve finally found The One (or at least The One For The Foreseeable Future) and you’ve committed to a serious relationship. Now what? In our new weekly column, Life After Dating, we’ll discuss the unique joys and challenges of coupledom.

When I was single, I spent a lot of time talking about my…

Anonymous / January 13, 2014

Girl Talk: The Truth About Blowjobs

When it comes to giving oral sex, or as one of my friends calls it, sucky sucky, women seem to fall into two camps: LOVE IT or HATE IT. When gossiping about sex, I feel this overwhelming pressure to declare that I go hog wild for head or loathe it so much that I’ve take…

Anonymous / November 14, 2013

True Story: I Only Use The Pullout Method

According to New York magazine, sexually active hetero women in their 20s and 30s are heretofore dubbed the “pullout generation.” We’ve earned this moniker because, for various reasons, we’ve turned up our noses at “conventional forms of birth control,” from the the Pill to condoms, and started relying on the withdrawal method to avoid pregnancy. The…

Anonymous / September 6, 2013

6 Mistakes Not To Make When Getting Set Up

A few months ago, my love life went through a dry spell. It wasn’t that messages weren’t coming in on Match.com or that guys wouldn’t chat me up when I hit happy hour after work. I just wasn’t connecting with anyone.  I felt really blah about the men who I went on dates with (usually…

Anonymous / May 23, 2013

True Story: I Worked As A High-End Stripper

“What do you feel about going topless?” he asked me over the phone. I hesitantly replied, “Well, I guess I’m okay with it. But will they be able to touch my boobs?” There was an awkward pause on the other end of the line. “Yes, but you’ll never have to do anything more. I promise.”…

Anonymous / April 2, 2013

Girl Talk: I’ve Started Disclosing My Rape On The First Date

Nearly four years ago, while I was on a third date with a man, I was raped. For a long time, I wouldn’t have been able to write that sentence. I would have equivocated. I would have quickly followed it up with minimizers like, “I was drunk.” Or, “I’m OK. It wasn’t violent.”…

Anonymous / March 21, 2013

Dealbreaker: His Penis Made Me Cry

At the tender age of 19, I had only seen a total of four penises: the guy who got into my bed naked after a rave in high school; my boyfriend who I lost my virginity to senior year; the balding dorm mate who I gave an unfortunate blow job to while a James Bond…

Anonymous / March 19, 2013

Girl Talk: Confessions Of A Nude Model

The flash went off with a “pop” and the photographer patiently told me to loosen up. My hands were sweaty and my heart was beating a mile a minute. Trying my best to concentrate, I twisted into an elegant pose and took a deep breath to soften my expression. The resulting photograph was beautiful but…

Anonymous / March 8, 2013

First Time For Everything: Using A Vibrating C**k Ring

The other weekend I was at brunch with some friends and the topic of our conversation was cock rings. Not your average brunch convo, but a lively one nonetheless.

“If you haven’t already, you girls have to get a vibrating cock ring. It changed everything.”

I know, this sounds like one…

Anonymous / March 7, 2013