The world’s saddest person has finally crawled out from under the sad bajillions of dollars she’s made over the years, clawed her way through the sad memories of the last decade of middlingly famous, questionably talented dudes who’ve rejected her and her sad self and at last trapped a man into filling the hole in… READ MORE »
Last week, an interracial couple showed up for their wedding cake tasting at a small, family owned bakery in Colorado. But when the shop owner caught sight of the together-for-two-years pair, he turned them away because he doesn’t believe interracial couples should get married.
In a statement to the local television station, Jack… READ MORE »
You know how the worst kind of parent will be all, “Oh, you couldn’t possibly understand what it means to truly love another human being until you have a child of your own?” And you are all, Oh word, you’re right, I must be the emotionally crippled jerk here because I don’t go around conducting… READ MORE »
In a couple of weeks, I’m going to be living it up in beautiful South Dakota. The occasion: my new grandma-in-law’s octogenarian birthday and combination family reunion. I hear there will be picnics and jet skis involved.
I am petrified.
But Andrea, how can you be petrified when there are jet… READ MORE »
What are you doing right now? Is it after noon? Actually, I don’t care if it is or not: go pour yourself a glass of something cold and boozy and join me in a toast to Katie Holmes, free woman.
I don’t much keep up with celebrity goings-on, certainly not beyond the two-month-old… READ MORE »
The amazing thing about life is how many complete assholes manage to find someone willing to put up with their bullshit and marry them. When I was a single person, the thing that crushed me the most when I was feeling lonely wasn’t that I thought I’d never find a spouse. It was that Donald… READ MORE »
I didn’t know how bad I was at being a wedding guest until I had my own wedding. I was bad about gifts and good about stiffing bartenders. Worst of all, I was terrible about crying on the dance floor when the DJ played “All The Single Ladies” because I was fresh off a breakup. READ MORE »
Last week’s Hitched column was all about the “myth of the happily married woman,” challenging the idea that marriage is some kind of natural state of being for women, who are biologically and culturally destined to need a man to complete their happiness.
Whether you believe in the Man Jesus or the Flying… READ MORE »
Wouldn’t you feel like shit, and wouldn’t I look like a jerk, if I sat around with this huge pile of adorable kittens and was all, “Oh man, my pile of adorable kittens is so great, I can’t get over how wonderful this pile of adorable kittens is, how can you not have a pile… READ MORE »
Miley Cyrus, pop star and heir to the “Achy, Breaky Heart” fortune, has announced that, at 19 years old, she’s engaged to marry her boyfriend of three years, actor Liam Hemsworth. I have this to say: Don’t do it, girl!
And when I Googled “Liam Hemsworth” to find out who the hell this… READ MORE »
If you are currently in the process of planning an elaborate and public marriage proposal to your intended, please consider not doing that, not doing that even for a minute, and instead consider just stopping everything you had planned and not ever doing that, and even if you still want to do it a little… READ MORE »