Profile for Ami Angelowicz

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Enter This V-Day Haiku Contest

In honor of the impending holiday (the one that starts with a “V”), Breakup Girl, the superhero whose domain is love or the lack thereof, is sponsoring a relationship-themed Haiku contest. Her blog, which combines comics, observations and dating news with classic advice letters, would not be complete without some love poetry. If you want a real challenge, try to communicate all of the lust, anguish, heartbreak, joy, and sorrow of your last relationship in 17 syllables. That breaks down to five-seven-five, math wizards. Team Breakup Girl and celebrity guest judge Joel Stein will pick zee winner from the top five entries, and the 2010 Haiku Master will be announced on Monday, February 15. After the jump, check out some our favorite entries, plus my own. [Breakup Girl] Keep reading »

10 Bitter Celebrity Custody Battles

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I guess Levi Johnston’s peen isn’t bringing in as much money as he had hoped. Or at least that’s what he’s saying in court, in order to get out of paying the $1,760 a month that Bristol Palin is requesting as child support for their son, Tripp. Why can’t he pay up? He says his income is erratic. Translation: his penis is unemployed. Bristol just wants him to get a job, see his son, and keep the child support flowing. Ruh-roh. Do I see a bitter custody battle in their future? [RadarOnline.com]

These two should quit while they’re ahead. They can learn a thing or two from celebs who have gone before them. After the jump, some more really messy custody battles. Beware, Bristol and Levi. This could be you.

Optimal Proposal Age Equation: Mathematical Genius Or BS?

Forget about love, romance, or following your gut when it comes to choosing a mate. Instead, rely on math. Scientists in Australia have developed an equation to predict a man’s “optimal proposal age.” They believe they have cracked the code to calculating when a dude should start ring shopping. And the most common age is … 27. But don’t fret if your 20s have come and gone … you’re still in the running. The equation is based on the age that a man is when he decides he wants to settle down versus the oldest possible age he is willing to be when he walks down the aisle. Geez. How romantic. Once a guy figures out his “optimal proposal age,” Tony Dooley from the University of New South Wales recommends that he should not propose to anyone before that age. After that age, he should be prepared to pop the question to the very next girl he gets serious with—as long as she’s the best he’s ever met. Yeah, because relationships are always so neat and predictable. What if she says “no” or he’s a douche? Is that part of the equation? After the jump, the simplified version of the equation. [Daily Mail] Keep reading »

Frisky Reader Revealed: AnitaBath Doesn’t Need A Bath … She Cleans Up Real Nice

Hands down, the best thing about working at The Frisky is our amazing readers. We so heart all of your witty, thoughtful, and informative comments—heck, we even appreciate the mean ones. Sometimes, we can’t help but wonder about the faces behind avatars. We decided to launch a weekly column where we learn all about a Frisky reader. After the jump, meet AnitaBath, one of our most prolific commenters. Keep reading »

What The Heck Is “Hypnosex”?

Alrighty folks, this is a new one for ya. Apparently, the sexual mash-up of the moment is called “erotic hypnosis” or “hypnosex,” i.e., a person performing hypnosis on another for sexual gratification. It’s essentially about mental control rather than physical. So how does this work? An erotic hypnotist (they’re called “hypnodommes”— you can find plenty of them on the interwebs) meets a client for an in-person session where they hypnotize them and talk them through a sexual fantasy. Hypnodommes also sell sexy mp3 recordings that claim to do the same. A hypnodomme can also supposedly help the “hypnosub” (I just made that word up) break through sexual blocks and barriers. Keep reading »

10 Celebrity Couples So In Love That We Want To Punch Them

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While most Hollywood couples are fleeting, flaky, or just using each other to promote their latest ventures, some couples are so into each other that they ooze love out of every freaking pore. The poster couple for celebrities crazy in love has to be Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis. What they have just seems so true and so real that I can’t help but be overwhelmed by jealousy. Vanessa said of her relationship with the sexiest man alive, “I love him, and I don’t have to say I like this and I don’t like that. When you love somebody, you take them as they are. I would not change him. He makes me happy. We are many things—we are together and, in a way, one person.” Yeah … so … Happy Valentine’s Day you two! I guess they are not breaking up anytime soon. It’s so sweet … almost like binging on a pint of Ben & Jerry’s. [People] After the jump, some more couples who are so in love that we want to hurt them.

10 Suggestions For How Jennifer Aniston Can Save Her Career

Has anyone else noticed that Jennifer Aniston‘s career has been at a standstill for like … um … since she left “Friends”? Yes, she is good at romantic comedies, but homegirl needs to move on. Whatever happened to growing as an actress and expanding your horizons? Jen seems to be forever stuck in the “Brad’s ex-wife, rom-com queen” niche. Basically, Jen, we’ll die if we have to see you play the same part one more time. Since we care so much, we’ve decided to make some suggestions for Jen to jump-start her career again and save her from celebrity super-boredom. Here’s what we think Jen should do to spice things up … Keep reading »

An “American Idol” Contestant Gives A Straight-Up Homage To Paula Abdul

“American Idol” hopeful Andrew Garcia made us straight-up miss former judge Paula Abdul last night with his amazing rendition of “Straight Up.” So what did the judges think? They couldn’t help but imagine how apes**t Paula would be if she were there. Even ultra-annoying Kara DioGuardi said, “Paula would be screaming and yelling.” She also might be drooling or slurring her speech or wearing a crazy outfit. OK … I love Ellen DeGeneres to death but I’m having a moment of Paula nostalgia. [PopEater] Keep reading »

12-Year-Old Girl Seeks Divorce From Her 80-Year-Old Husband

It’s the best possible ending to the most disgusting marriage I’ve ever heard of. A 12-year-old Saudi girl is seeking a divorce from her 80-year-old cousin-turned-husband. That was not a typo. She’s 12; he’s 80. And yes … they are related. She was sold … err … married to him for $30,000 against the wishes of her mother. How is this even legal, you ask? Saudi law does not specify a minimum age for marriage. But the Saudi Human Rights Commission thinks the marriage is wrong and has decided to take a stand and help the little girl obtain a divorce. Thank God! Here’s hoping that the ruling in this case will set a precedent which will make Saudi officials reevaluate the law when it comes to legal marriage age. [Newser] Keep reading »

The Science Of Love

Some of us need proof in order to believe in the existence of life’s elusive mysteries. Call us skeptics if you like, but aren’t we really just being rational human beings? Take this so-called “love” thingy for example. Why are we all wasting our money on chocolates and roses this Valentine’s Day for an intangible, irrational feeling? You can’t see it, or touch it—there is no scientific way to quantify this crazy little thing called love. Or is there? After the jump, some recent scientific findings about love, for those of us who prefer fact over fancy when it comes to our hearts’ desires. See if these findings make you a believer. Keep reading »

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