I think I am recovering from a disease that I didn’t even know had a name. When I read about Failed Potential Syndrome in the Daily Mail, the symptoms sounded disturbingly familiar. FPS is characterized by peer envy (check), failure to launch (check), and a general feeling that you haven’t quite achieved what you had expected to by a certain age (double check). Well, at least it’s good that I can finally diagnose myself?
See, I was a superstar kid. You know—the one who gets good grades and the leads in all of the community theater plays. The one whose parents may have made her feel a little bit too special. The one who might have been a little bit awkward, but was banking on her smarts and talents to catapult her into all-around adult greatness and mega-success.
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Here’s the plot of my new favorite blog, 50 JDates: A 26-year old Jewish girl is in love with her boyfriend, who’s a goy (aka, not a Jew). The two lovebirds are considering marriage, but because her family is super religious and it’s important to them that she marries a Jewish man, she asks her boyfriend to convert. He says, “No.” Now she is torn—her mother doesn’t want the marriage to happen, and she’s not sure what to think. So how does she deal? She does something that I can only describe as my worst nightmare—she joins JDate, a Jews-only online dating site and pledges to go on 50 dates, writing about each and every one. At the end of the 50 dates, she’ll decide if she can accept her non-Jewish man, refuse her family’s wishes, and get engaged. Or who knows, maybe her beshert will come along. I can’t say I’d have the chutzpah to take on such a daunting task—but this girl is doing it with an open heart and an open mind. L’chaim, lady!
P.S. Don’t tell my mother about this social experiment. I don’t want her to get any crazy ideas. Keep reading »
Want to know everything there is to know about Leonardo DiCaprio
? Well then, you’ll want to watch this unauthorized documentary “Hangin’ With Leo!!” With totally sketchy footage and contradictory interviews with people who don’t seem to be experts on anything, this doc takes you deep inside the mind of Leo. Here’s what I learned about Leo … Keep reading »
In her Salon piece, “A Nation of Attention Whores,” Mary Elizabeth Williams asks why everyone in this country seems so starved for fame. I think that very question is on everyone’s mind after the recent “Balloon Boy” incident. As Falcon Heene vomited on national television, you couldn’t help but feel sick about being taken for a [balloon] ride by his fame whore papa. And that’s just one of many examples of how people are doing crazier and crazier things to get their 15 minutes. Others: Meghan McCain’s boobs, Jon and Kate, Susan Boyle, OctoMom, Real Housewives, Perez Hilton—the list goes on and on. Ever since the evolution of reality TV and the internet, it is easier than ever for anyone to get famous for just about anything. No talent, intelligence, or hard work required. But why are we so obsessed with fame? Keep reading »
I have seriously had enough of playing voyeur to Carnie Wilson’s ultra-public weight struggles. I liked her in Wilson Phillips and on her short-lived talk show. But then came the live broadcast of her gastric bypass surgery (gross!) and her appearance on “Oprah” to talk about it. Next was “Celebrity Fit Club,” two autobiographies, a spread in Playboy, and a gig hosting “The Newlywed Game” on the Game Show Network. But that’s not all, folks. In a move that I can only describe as seriously tacky, Carnie will be starring in her very own reality TV series on GSN called “Carnie: Wilson: Unstapled.” The show will follow her life as a working mother trying to lose 50 pounds of baby weight. Carnie, noooo! We’ve already seen the inside of your abdominal cavity—what else do you want from us? We get it. You have battled with obesity and come out the victor. We are happy for you. You look great! Please move on with your life. You no longer need to use your weight as a gimmick for success. [Google News] Keep reading »
Who can forget Christian Bale’s haunting portrayal of yuppie serial killer Patrick Bateman in “American Psycho”? I swear, after I saw that movie, I went out on a date with a hot Wall Street suit-and-tie who told me he was a Genesis fan. I bolted out of the restaurant, convinced that he was planning to dissect me and play with my blood. In a recent Blackbook interview, “American Psycho” director Mary Harron revealed Christian’s true inspiration for the role was … none other than our favorite Scientologist, Tom Cruise. She says, “We talked about how Martian-like Patrick Bateman was, how he was looking at the world like somebody from another planet, watching what people did and trying to work out the right way to behave. And then one day he called me and he had been watching Tom Cruise on ‘David Letterman,’ and he just had this very intense friendliness with nothing behind the eyes, and he was really taken with this energy.”
Thank you, Christian. I’ve had a sneaking suspicion for a while that Tom is really an alien. Hey, you don’t get to be a higher-up in The Church of Scientology for nothing. After the jump, some more celebrities that have used other stars as inspiration for roles. [Celebitchy] Keep reading »
So maybe I would go to former sitcom star Suzanne Somers for advice about how to shape up my thighs (remember the Thigh Master?), but certainly not for tips about how to help cure cancer. In her new book, Knockout: Interviews With Doctors Who Are Curing Cancer And How To Prevent It In The First Place (it’s her 19th book … I know … what the heck is she writing about?), Suzanne is making some outrageous claims that are making people at the American Cancer Society outraged. Keep reading »
“La-di-da,” said Diane Keaton in “Annie Hall,” sticking her hands in her menswear trousers and fiddling with her fedora. “La-di-da.”
I was in my early 20s, a naïve actress who had just moved from New York City to Los Angeles to jumpstart my career, the first time I saw the classic, semi-autobiographical movie about the relationship between Woody Allen and Diane Keaton. I watched as Diane/Annie described her Midwestern childhood, met with her analyst, and made out with Woody Allen before moving on to a Hollywood record exec. I rolled my eyes. “Ugh,” I thought. “What’s wrong with this crazy woman? I will never be like her. She’s a men’s tie-wearing ditzy, clumsy, neurotic mess with a series of failed, overwrought relationships. No thank you.” Keep reading »
OK, this story is literally a nightmare. Nick Walker, a 21-year-old student at The Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts in London, went out drinking with some friends, including a 21-year-old girl who was visiting for the weekend. As the night wound down, they all passed out at the friend’s apartment where she was staying. This poor girl woke up in the middle of the night when she felt a “weird sensation.” She found that all of her clothes had been removed and that Nick was on top of her. Nick has no physical memory of any of this—he left the next morning without a word to the victim and later friend-requested her on Facebook, as if nothing happened. When she pressed charges, he was shocked and says that if he did rape her, he must have been sleepwalking. He admitted that this has happened to him before with his own girlfriend. Ack! How awful for everyone involved. Still, whether it was a conscious act or not, the fact remains that this poor girl was raped. Who pays for the crime? Is it fair that this guy should have been cleared of the rape charges? [Daily Mail] Keep reading »