I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT TODAY, JUNE 28, 2012, IS INTERNATIONAL CAPS LOCK DAY. A SPECIAL CAPS LOCK MEMORY FOR YOU IN HONOR OF THE DAY: I ONCE WORKED FOR SOMEONE WHO DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THE EXISTENCE OF THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON AND SHE SENT AN URGENT E-MAIL TO OUR IT GUY SAYING THAT HER COMPUTER “WAS BROKEN” BECAUSE IT “WOULDN’T STOP TYPING IN ALL CAPITALS.” WE DIDN’T HAVE THE HEART TO DIVULGE THE SECRET OF THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON TO HER BECAUSE A) SHE WENT TO AN IVY LEAGUE COLLEGE AND PRIDED HERSELF ON BEING VERY SMART AND B) BECAUSE IT WAS TOO MUCH FUN. ENJOY YOUR DAY AND FEEL FREE TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS UNTIL MIDNIGHT TONIGHT IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT.
If you’re unsure of your partner’s ability to remain faithful, there’s a solution for you. TheCheeky.com is selling an anti-cheating wedding band that imprints the words “I’m Married” on your partner’s finger. So, should they try to slip off their wedding band to appear unmarried, they’ll be caught. How diabolical. Bwahahaha. Actually, no. Let’s review a few things here. If you’re concerned about your partner cheating, you might want to reconsider the relationship, or try couples’ counseling before you resort to ring-finger branding. Also, as evidenced by Rielle Hunter, knowing someone is married doesn’t necessarily deter everyone from engaging in extra-marital affairs. Save your $550. May we recommend the 5-minute rule instead? [death and taxes]
The third season of TLC’s “Strange Sex” is back this Sunday and will include a segment about a man with a breastfeeding fetish. Yep. Jeff is sexually aroused by getting his wife Michelle pregnant and drinking her breast milk. He has been “feeding” off of her for the last year-and-a-half and claims that milk straight from the source cured his erectile dysfunction. (Wait. What!?)
“The first time I breast fed from Michelle, I just latched on and the milk started flowing and it was just such a huge turn on that I had to stop because I would have just finished right then and there,” Jeff confesses. Keep reading »
I was scared to hear Lykke Li’s cover of Fleetwood Mac’s “Silver Springs” on the soon-to-be-released album Just Tell Me That You Want Me — A Tribute to Fleetwood Mac as it is my favorite song of all time. I know I like to exaggerate, but I am not exaggerating this time. It is seriously my favorite song. Hence, my expectations were ridiculously high. Honest reaction: I don’t hate it. OK … fine … I like it. It’s good. But Stevie Nicks is still my woman music goddess of life and all others will pale in comparison. You can listen Lykke Li’s version of the song here. After the jump, you can hear some other tracks on the album, which drops on August 14, from Best Coast and The New Pornographers. [Gorilla Vs Bear] Keep reading »
I am writing this post at the request of my co-workers. This morning when I came into the office, my co-workers were talking about how our video server was being obstinate. My reply was, “You must romance it into submission.” This was met with confused looks. So, I was obliged to present my Theory Of Technology Romance. My hypothesis is as follows: The more adversarial and impatient you are toward technology, the more problems it will present you. Shower your technology with love, kindness and affection, romance it, and you will have your technology eating out of the palm of your hand. Well, not eating, but printing out your copies, sending your epic text message when you have one bar of service or generally submitting to your will. Love your technology and it will love you back. After the jump, some tips for how to do this. Keep reading »
In light of Nora Ephron’s passing yesterday at the age of 71, I felt a desire to pay tribute to the journalist/writer/director in some way. As a female writer it’s important to honor the careers of women who you admire, who inspire you in how to craft your own career. Click around the web and you’ll find it saturated with life lessons, quotes from her books and movies, scenes we should remember. I could give you another roundup like that. There are at least 10 lines from “When Harry Met Sally” that come up in my conversations regularly. Baby fish mouth, anyone? But that doesn’t feel sufficient to me. What specifically do I want to thank Nora Ephron for? For giving me permission to order my dressing on the side? For being one of the first women to write a personal essay about her breasts? For launching a writing career using autobiographical material? Yes, but still, it’s more than that.
Last night, after hearing news of Ephron’s passing, I was unable to think of anything else. I was finishing my second glass of wine at a birthday dinner for a good, male friend. I looked across the table at him. He smiled at me in this way that only he can, in a way that feels really comforting. A new thought came automatically.
He could be the guy I end up with. Keep reading »