Zergnet: Simply Irresistible
Profile for Ami Angelowicz
Why am I so addicted to “The Real Housewives?” I’m still trying to unpack that. I’ll give you the simple reason. For starters, at the end of a long day, it makes me happy to watch women fighting over hangers. I know, no matter what, “The Real Housewives” will always make me feel better about my own existence. Maybe they are intended to have the opposite effect, to shame me for all I don’t have. It didn’t work. The housewives always remind me that money really can’t buy you class, as the Countess Luann deLesseps would say. Click through to see some great “Real Housewives” moments caught on gif.
A team of Japanese scientists have invented a virtual pregnancy suit to help men understand what to expect when their partner is expecting. The suit, which simulates the many sensations of pregnancy, using water balloons which expand and contract, can replicate nine months of pregnancy in just two minutes. Now dudes can know what it would feel like to have a fetus kicking and wiggling inside their uteri. Question: why does everyone in this video appear to be having such a jolly good time? From what I’ve heard, pregnancy is no holiday. What about the morning sickness? The swollen ankles? The sweating? The pressure on your bladder? The contractions? I don’t know. This looks basically like a Wii worthy pregnancy video game. [Neatorama]
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Hollywood these days is all about positioning and spin, and—what can we say?— it’s made us more than a little jaded. In this new column, we will share some of our most out-there theories about what’s really going on in the celeb-u-verse. Now, keep in mind that none of this is based on fact or even on the testimony of anonymous sources. They are purely hunches, and we could be totally and completely wrong. That said, we would not be super surprised if, some day, it came out that a few of our theories were right.
I believe I’ve uncovered the hidden agenda of this season of “The Bachelorette.” Ashley Hebert doesn’t give a fig about finding love. And she doesn’t actually want to become a dentist, even though she’s in school for it. It seems to me that she’d be more interested in becoming a contestant on “Dancing With the Stars.” The evidence after the jump. Keep reading »
You may want to think twice about becoming an intern for the Clintons. We know what became of Monica Lewinsky, but apparently Hillary Clinton also had a notorious intern. The star of such porno hits as “White Bubble Butts #4″, Sammie Spades once dreamed of a career in politics. In the summer of 2006, she managed to land an internship in Hillary Clinton’s Buffalo office. I guess it didn’t go so well considering that Sammie went from sporting power suits to sporting lamé bikinis in just a few short years. So what happened? Sammie says she learned that “having sex on tape was the best way to pay the bills.” Words of wisdom if I ever heard them. Hillary must be kvelling. [TMZ]
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Dolphins are peaceful creatures, my ass. According to scientists, violence among young male dolphins is on the rise. A gang of bottleneck dolphins in the Pacific Ocean have been wreaking havoc on porpoises that invade their turf in the Monterey Bay. “Porpocide” by “dive-by” in that area is three times higher than it’s ever been. The bottlenecks surround their porpoise victim, ram it to death with their noses, and use the carcass for a game of catch. That’s hardcore. Why the senseless violence against the porpoise population, you ask? Simply put, the bottlenecks are sexually frustrated. What is our natural world coming to? [OC Weekly] Keep reading »
Carey Mulligan has a new man on her arm. The actress is reportedly smitten with Mumford & Sons singer, Marcus Mumford. I mean, have you heard the album? How could she not fall for him with a voice like that? I very much approve of this match. Shia LeBeouf can go crawl back into his mother’s womb. [E Online]
Every sweet starlet dreams of snagging her very own bad boy rocker. Many have accomplished the feat, but few have survived the coupling long-term. But, hey, dating a rocker is all about having fun while it lasts. Click through to see the actress/rock star couples who are making beautiful music together, at least for the moment.
I wasn’t sure at first why Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries were inspired to rush to the altar. Now I know. The expensive gifts! I took a gander at Kim and Kris’ Gearys Beverly Hills registry and found that, for the same cost as the items with which they wish to grace their home, they could feed an entire third world country. Recession? What recession? [Celebitchy]
Click through to see the most ridiculous items on the couple’s wedding registry.
I thought the only time I’d ever see a Cabbage Patch Kid again was if I worked up the nerve to clean out the stuffed animal and doll section of my parent’s garage. Ironic that they would end up buried in a dusty box considering the herculean effort exerted to adopt all eight of them from Babyland General Hospital. Thanks, Mom and Dad for waiting in line at K-Mart for most of 1984! Good news, children (and parents) of the ’80s! The lovable kids with the yarn hair may be making a comeback. A film company purchased the screen rights the brand and are developing an animated TV film special starring the kids. This news excites me very much. [Guardian] Keep reading »