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See Which States Last The Longest In The Sack (Spoiler Alert: Nobody’s Breaking 10 Minutes)

See Which States Last The Longest In The Sack (Spoiler Alert: Nobody's Breaking 10 Minutes)
According to the data collected from 10,000 users of the Spreadsheets sex app, which allows you to track various aspects of your sexual performance including thrusts per minute, duration and orgasmic decibel levels, the United States is not actually all that amazing at keeping the party going for much longer than your average commercial break. Congratulations (I guess) to the fine people of New Mexico who managed to pump for an average of 7 minutes and one second. And our condolences to the Alaskans, who came in dead last. Does it even count if you go for less than a minute and 30 seconds? I say no. See how your state ranks in sex duration, but prepare yourself to be mildly embarrassed. [Nerve]

Finally! Science Explains Why You Can’t Ever Remember Your Dreams

As a dream analysis enthusiast, I’ve shared my tips for recalling your nightly adventures more easily. While I still think a few simple tricks can help you remember your dreams more often and in more detail, it turns out that there is a scientific reason why some of us remember our dreams more regularly than others. In a study published in the journal Cerebral Cortex, researchers studied the brain patterns of “high dream recallers” and “low dream recallers” and found that the “high dream recallers”showed stronger brain activity, both while awake and while asleep, in the part of the brain responsible for attending to external stimuli. Keep reading »

Kate Upton’s Zero Gravity Bikinis Are Floating To A Target Near You

Kate-Upton's-Zero-Gravity-Bikinis-Are-Flying-To-A-Target-Near-You

I know, I know. The moment you saw Kate Upton’s zero gravity Sports Illustrated photo spread, you were like, Where can I get a teeny tiny gold bikini that would be appropriate to wear in space and kind of makes me look like a more vapid Barbarella? Wonder no more because Target has teamed up with Sports Illustrated to create an exclusive line of swimsuits based on the 50th anniversary issue. You can purchase an exact replicas of Kate’s two zero-G bikinis for a mere $35. Boobs that defy gravity are not included. [People]

Kate Upton’s Boobs Survived Zero Gravity — Plus, That Time Miley Cyrus Ate A Pair Of Panties

Do Not Want: Fifty Shades Of Grey Teddy Bear

This must stop. “Fifty Shades Of Grey,” be it the book or the movie, must stop ruining the world. I know that it’s natural to want to sell merchandise related to a phenomenon because MONEY. A Fifty Shades sex toy kit? I can make a snarky remark about the Twitchy Palm Paddle. I can wonder if it might bring someone more pleasure/pain than a regular paddle. And then I can call it a day. But a Christian Grey teddy bear? I must draw the line at a kinky teddy bear. Keep reading »

Cloppers Rejoice: Tasha Reign’s “My Little Pony” Porn Is Here (NSFW)

Cloppers Rejoice: Tasha Reign's "My Little Pony" Porn Is Here (NSFW)
Tasha and friends seek centaur love juice

We knew that former Reality TV star, Penthouse model, adult film star and sex columnist Tasha Reign had gone so far as to create a line of Reignbow Pony butt plugs, but we had no idea she was hard at work on a “My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic”-inspired porn. “Tasha’s Pony Tales” is about four girls who drink a magic potion at a sleepover (because that’s TOTALLY what happens at sleepovers!) and are transported via children’s playground to Magic Pony Cloud Land where they are transformed into ponies (read: outfitted in pointy ears and Tasha’s line of butt plugs). Once in Magic Pony Cloud Land, the four phillies are on a mission to obtain “centaur love juice “so they can stay ponies forever and ever and live happily ever after. Ah yes, the magic elixir: centaur sperm. Keep reading »

Watch One Woman Sing “Let It Go” In The Voice Of 13 Divas

Watch-One-Woman-Sing-'Let-It-Go'-In-The-Voice-Of-13-Divas
A Diva Who Channels Divas

Vocal chameleon Christina Bianco, who sang “Total Eclipse Of The Heart” in 19 different voices, is back with an encore performance of “Let It Go.” This time she sings in the style of Idina Menzel, Demi Lovato, Britney Spears, Alanis Morissette, Celine Dion, Kristin Chenoweth, Adele, Julie Andrews, Barbara Streisand, Christina Aguilera, Kelly Clarkson, THE GREAT Liza Minnelli and herself. Let us all bow down to her, the vocal diva, channeler of divas. [DListed]

Science Says Porn Addiction Is A Bunch Of Cockamamie

Stop Masturbating
sign for teen boy masturbating on towels
A mom left this not for her 13-year-old son. Read More »
Weird Masturbation
The weirdest places one woman has masturbated. Read More »
Masturbation Flowchart
Is now a good time to masturbate? Read More »

According to a piece published in Springer’s journal Current Sexual Health Reports, clinical psychologist Dr. Ley would like to remind us all that there’s no strong scientific research that proves “porn addiction” actually exists and that slapping a label on the healthy practice of wanking to visuals is counterintuitive to helping patients who struggle with doing it too often. In fact, Ley believes that the positive benefits of looking at porn far outweigh the negative. He sites that, when used in a healthy way, porn improves attitudes about sexuality, increases pleasure in long-term relationships and provides a legal outlet for illegal sexual behaviors or desires. Keep reading »

Nice, Nice Baby: Vanilla Ice Is An Outstanding Citizen Of The Year

In addition starring in his own DIY reality show and creating a line of chandeliers and wall sconces, Vanilla Ice aka Rob Van Winkle, has been really busy being a stand-up citizen since his rap career fizzled. In fact, he’s been such an upstanding member of his hometown for the last decade, that The Chamber of Commerce in Wellington, Florida, has named him their Outstanding Citizen Of The Year. They’ve chosen Van Winkle to receive this town’s highest honor for  his “spirit of giving and dedication” to the village and his “wide open” heart. “He’s the ambassador of Wellington and a family man, puts kids in school here, among community, well-known, friendly,” said Wellington Chamber of Commerce Executive Director Michela Perillo-Green. Gone are his days of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle raps and clandestine shtups with Madonna. But seriously, word to his mother. He turned out real nice. [Broward/Palm Beach New Times]

The Sports Illustrated 50th Anniversary Swimsuit Issue Is All About Ass

Final Frontier?
Kate Upton's Boobs Conquer The Final Frontier
Will Kate Upton's boobs conquer the final frontier? Read More »
Her Self-Esteem
Kate Upton's Sports Illustrated Cover Was Bad For Her Self-Esteem
Kate Upton says her SI cover was bad for her self-esteem. Read More »
Kate's Boob Tricks
Kate Upton Boob Trick
Kate Upton is the most creative with her boobs. Read More »
The Sports Illustrated 50th Anniversary Swimsuit Issue Is All About Ass

Today we learned that not one, but THREE bums — Nina Agdal’s, Lily Aldridge’s and Chrissy Teigen’s — will be gracing the cover of the Sports Illustrated 50th anniversary swimsuit issue. We get the hint. Ass is in for 2014 and Kate Upton’s boobs are out. Actually, I don’t think it’s possible for her boobs to go out of style. They’ll also be in the issue, which is due out next week. Just not on the cover. [What Would Tyler Durden Do]

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