Zergnet: Simply Irresistible
Profile for Amelia McDonell-Parry
Last night was the premiere of “No Strings Attached,” Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman’s sure-to-be completely unrealistic rom-com about two friends who try and have casual sex. So did the stars dress like they were looking to get lucky? Keep clicking for the good, the bad, and the meh. There were two WTFs this time around.
After much thought and Advil, I have decided I am going on a sex/dating and drinking sabbatical. I went on a six-month sex sabbatical after my breakup from my fiance a few years ago — or, rather, I announced I was going on a six-month sex sabbatical and then it lasted for, I think, around two. It wasn’t a complete failure, in other words. Hilariously, I went on a sex sabbatical because all of my efforts to get laid were being thwarted and I figured I might as well decide to NOT have sex with a purpose.
Meanwhile, I have never taken a significant break from drinking. I didn’t start drinking until I was in college — I believe most people start in high school, so I was a late bloomer in more ways than one — and I remember the night I got drunk the first time as well as you can possibly remember a hazy night 13 years ago. The amount and frequency of my drinking has gone up and down over the years, but I generally consider myself to be a responsible boozer. I don’t drink and drive (easy when you don’t have a car!), I don’t say things I don’t mean, and, for the most part, I don’t do things I actually regret. Keep reading »
Apparently, when I just walked to the deli to pick up a Diet Coke (the only one I’ve had all day, as I am trying to kick the habit), my outfit — which includes striped leggings tucked into Uggs — communicated to my doorman that I’m a trendy and spendy slut who forgot to put on pants. Oh wait, he knew that already. [I Love Charts] Keep reading »
I caught the tail end of Matt Lauer’s interview with Snooki on “The Today Show” this morning and cringed as he sort of scolded her for being such a drunk. (She swears she’s just a wastoid during the summer.) But I apparently missed the best part of the interview, when Snooki taught Matt what a “weenis” was. Now, before you watch the video, let’s see if you can guess the definition:
- A contraption a woman can use to pee in public without exposing her backside.
- The wrinkly bit of skin on your elbow.
- Snooki’s male alter ego — full name, Weenis Sambucco.
For the record, I was clueless as to the definition of the word “weenis” and I never thought I would learn something new — except maybe dance moves — from Snooki. Keep reading »
I would like to start this post off with an apology, to you and to all of Hollywood. I have been so focused on my unabashed love for Ryan Gosling, I have been completely remiss in my responsibilities. I have not been paying close enough attention to who the stars of tomorrow shall be. I haven’t been sussing out who will walk in the perfect footsteps left by The Gos. All that changes now. I am casting him aside for today and focusing my sights on the men who will rock your world in 2011 on the big and small screen.
Baby, it is cold outside. What we wouldn’t give for that mythical garment that both keeps us warm and enlivens our wardrobe with a little imagination. Does such a thing exist? Why yes! This crewneck’s red and gray stripes will go great with any of the neutrals in your closet, the snuggly wool with banded sleeves is sensible and warm, and that red unicorn on the front? She takes this sweater from basic to majestic.
[$75.00 Pixie Market]